Seungwoo walks out the door, tears in his eyes, bags in hand, one last time. He can't believe he is letting this happen, but he can't believe that you are letting this happen as well. He opens the trunk of his car, throws his bags in haphazardly, and slams it shut. Opening the driver's side door he looks at the front door to your building, hoping that you would run out and beg for him to come back.

He slides himself onto the seat, still waiting. Turns on the car. Waiting. Takes it out of park. Hoping. He looks at the door one final time, tries not to let the tears fall past his eyelashes, and drives off.

The sun setting in front of him. 

He makes it to the highway, the sight of you still imprinted in his mind. The breakup replaying over and over and over again. She found someone else, Seungwoo couldn't believe it. She said that she never did anything with the new guy, but, she said he made him happier. All Seungwoo wanted was for you to be happy, so if that meant breaking up and leaving you for a guy who does; he will. And he did. 

A big part of him just wants to turn around, get on his knees and beg to have you back. But he knows it will not change your mind. It hurts him that he won't be able to change your mind. 

Seungwoo can't face the members tonight, not in the state he is in. He gets into another lane and makes his way to a nearby motel he slept in once before--when you two had a huge fight and he threatened to move out. He got his key to his room for the night, flopped down onto the bed, and cried his eyes out. Silent sobs pouring from his open mouth, endless tears streaming out of his tightly shut eyelids. He cried until he fell asleep. 

The sun has set, the moon rises, darkness swallows the sky. 

When he wakes up it is early morning, 5 am. 

The sky still dark, the moon setting slowly. 

He turns his key back in at the lobby and sets off to the dorms. It feels odd for him to actually go to the dorm with all of his things in the trunk and not to just wake them up for the next broadcast they were going to; he's going to live there again. And not live with you. The thought of not being able to see you in the morning hurts him and makes him want to sob at the thought. Not being able to hold you close at night, makes him just want to turn back and beg. 

When he finally makes it to the dorm, after what feels like forever, he uses the keypad to unlock the door and as quietly as possible, move his bags in. In his room, Hanse is sleeping in his old bed. Seungwoo sighs, really not in the mood for the sudden questions he'll be getting from the younger as he wakes him up. He takes a hand and nudges Hanse at the shoulder. Hanse groans lightly and opens his a bit, then a lot, surprised at the sight of the leader standing at the side of the bed. Hanse opens his mouth to say something but Seungwoo silences him as quickly as possible, then points to the door. The younger gets the message and moves as quickly as his sleepy body will let him. 

Seungwoo practically crashes into the bed, and there is where he finishes his sleeping for most of the day. He wasn't going to get out of bed; it was painfully obvious to the members when they all woke up. That day, the most Seungwoo moved from the bed was to change into sleeping clothes instead of the jeans and shirt he was wearing the night you-

Seungsik called the manager and told him that Seungwoo wouldn't make it to practice today because he was sick. The talk amongst the members was about Seungwoo; their strong, dad like leader was down for the count. Subin, Byungchan, and Chan thought it was because he was actually sick. Seungsik, Hanse, Sejun knew that it had to have been because of you. Hanse and Sejun think that you two probably just had a huge fight which resulted in him leaving for the day. Seungsik knew it was far different than any fight you and Seungwoo have had. 

Seungwoo looked more melancholy and sullen than he ever had. Seungsik noticed the tear streaks that were left on his face, the puffiness of his eyes, his whole demeanor had changed since the other day when he had seen him. Seungsik is not well versed in love, but he knows a heartbreak when he sees one. 

After a whole day of moping around the dorm for Seungwoo, and a whole day of practice for the other members, it was time to sleep. Except Seungwoo. All he did the whole day was sleep, eat, use the bathroom, or cry (not necessarily in that order). Seungwoo couldn't sleep, it felt too weird. 

It felt weird to not have the blood circulation in his arm being cut off because you liked to use his arm as a pillow most nights. It felt weird to have 1 pillow instead of two (you either used his arm or no pillow at all, thus giving it to Seungwoo). It felt weird to not have another pair of legs tangled with his. The sound of the night was different than the other nights he couldn't sleep. No soft snores from you, only Seungsik's train snores that could wake up the neighborhood. No white noise machine, that you use to help fall asleep. The bed felt colder. He felt emptier. The world might as well stop revolving right now because he doesn't have you. That is a bit of a stretch, but, he feels as if nothing matters because he doesn't have you. 

The thoughts kept coming in waves. One moment he's staring blankly at the ceiling thinking of nothing, the next, he is thinking of you and trying not to let a sob crack through his lips. One thought did have a desperate cry ring through the dorm for a split second, he didn't try to win you back. He didn't do anything to prevent this from happening. He let it happen and he let one of the best things to ever happen to him leave him for some other man. 

After the cry rang out, the snores stopped. Seungsik woke up. He looked at the clock by his bunk and saw that it was 3 in the morning, too early to be awake. He heard the sobs then, the frame shaking sobs that had to have been coming from the only person he can think of, Seungwoo. He looked at the singular bed in the room. In the darkness, he can see the lump that is Seungwoo. 

Seungwoo was his side, back towards the other member's bunk beds. His sobs weren't loud, he forced them to not be loud as much as he wanted to scream and let it all out, he didn't want to wake any of the members. They were body wracking. His inhales are ragged, his exhales are broken. The tears turn the light blue pillowcase darker. He brought the blanket up closer to his mouth to block out any sound that may come out of his mouth. His plan of keeping quiet must not have worked because he felt a tap on his shoulder and a quiet whisper. 

"Hyung, I have your shoes and your jacket. Put them on, we're going on a walk." 

It was Seungsik.