Have you ever watched a sunset? When you're happy, all it can ever mean is the promise of a new beginning. But when you're sad you're watching the sun slowly fade into the horizon. You know what's coming and somehow you can't tear your eyes away from the way it's bleeding out completely. Something once so powerful simply fades. Youngjae was the sun and with each passing day his sunsets got a little harder to bear. The solution was simple, it was the only way. Otherwise there may have been no more sunrises.

Not for Ahgases.

"What do you mean 'you love me'?"

Confessions don't always go the way they are portrayed in movies, dramas or even music videos. The moment Youngjae confessed to Jaebum was the moment he messed up a lot of things for a lot of people. Regardless of the fact that he knew Jaebum's heart didn't belong to him, he felt he deserved to know the truth.

Jaebum paled. Once Youngjae explained the ways he had been aching because of his love for Jaebum, the group's leader looked like he was going to be sick. He had overlooked Youngjae’s feelings so blindly he'd allowed one of his group members to feel the need to obliterate himself and run to a place where he could overcome the pain inflicted by the one that was appointed to protect him. Im Jaebum was appointed to lead the boys into a life of happiness and success and had failed to do so for the boy who had the least training. He had caused a sunset where shining rays of light were supposedly ever-existing. For all of that, he would never forgive himself.

"I don't blame you, hyung," Youngjae spoke through his tears, "Trust me when I say that I don't. I don't blame you and I don't blame Jinyoung hyung either. This is something I need to do for myself and I'm sorry to put you through the trouble of not having your group members all in one place." He sniffles, looking off to the side, "I'll work hard not to disappoint you again, so please forgive me this once."

It all started when Jaebum started talking in his sleep. Usually, Youngjae would sleep like a rock, but once his crush on Jaebum evolved into something a little more serious, those days were over. He noticed Jaebum tossing and turning next to him and wanted to help, in any way possible. What started off as random babbling, soon turned into full blown conversations that would make the already confused boy even more helpless. Then Jaebum started calling out Jinyoung’s name in his sleep and the younger boy felt crushed. He knew he’d never have with Jaebum what Jinyoung had with him. They’d spent every waking minute together before they were told to debut with GOT7.

"I'll go get Jinyoung..." Every night, Youngjae’s heart bruised a little harder, ached a little more as he got up from his shared bed with Jaebum, only to walk over to where Jinyoung was sleeping and reuniting the two.

Jaebum was always thankful, always smiling whenever Youngjae offered to help, but the smile never quite reached his eyes in the same way it did whenever Jinyoung walked over and slid into their bed, next to the one Youngjae loved most. Youngjae had come to detest the room he slept in, since it was not his room anymore – not theirs anymore. Somehow so many of Jinyoung's clothes ended up in their closet, the boy had to brace himself for heartache every time he opened it. Living life wasn’t easy when he couldn’t bring himself to open a closet door.

Knowing that Jinyoung lay next to the man he loved was one thing. Youngjae knew they were close. It wasn’t what hurt him most. It was the sneaking around that slowly drove Youngjae to lose his smile. He could hear them. How could he not, when the one he loved most was balls deep inside of Jinyoung, hiding in the darkness of a locked bathroom and giving him all kinds of affection Youngjae could’ve only yearned for?

Youngjae had tried to be attractive to him. He had tried sleeping in the , he’d tried holding Jaebum in his sleep, but the only result that come from it was hearing him whisper Jinyoung's name in his sleep instead of Youngjae’s. There was no use, since all he’d ever be is part of the vocal line in the group, the person Jaebum would go to only when he could make a show out of it on stage. Youngjae knew he wasn’t perfect, but he was confident enough to know that he wasn’t nothing, either. He deserved more than... more than this. He deserved happiness. He needed it, so he could give it back to others.

"Can I come in?"

Youngjae swallowed thickly as he stepped into Mark and Jackson’s room. After they moved into the new dorm, the two had decided to dedicate one room to Jackson’s rubbish and “move back in together”. It was only a matter of time, really.

Both boys smiled up at Youngjae expectantly, but with every word Youngjae uttered, their smiles fell. They were always laughing, making everybody happy. They made each other happy, even if they hadn't quite figured that out yet. Jackson, who was always the one to crack a joke to make any kind of tension disappear, sat across from Youngjae; his face without the trace of a smile and unmoving until he heard Mark's sniffling next to him.

Unlike what most think, Mark would have been a great leader. He wouldn’t ever talk much, but he always listened, compromised, and provided solutions like any leader would be proud