.I.

Sacrifice

Zi Tao's POV

I noticed my reflection in the mirror. I smiled bitterly when i saw several bruises are printed clearly in some parts of my body. When i touched the bruises, i feel pain. Yeah, pain. But nothing compared to the pain in my heart when i thinking about someone who makes the bruises in my body. My own boyfriend. Ah, no. Not my boyfriend. He doesn't think that i'm his boyfriend anymore, right? Maybe, just someone who i cared to much.

My eyes are heating up, probably because i want to crying right now. But, i can't. I can't crying right now, because...

BRAK.

"HUANG ZI TAO!"

Yes, because 'he' will arrive soon. And now, he is.

"Huang Zi Tao! Where are you?!"

The sound was growing louder and louder. I wiped the tears that has fallen slightly. Then, i braced myself and out of the room. 

"I'm here. What happen?" I asked. Trying to hide my feeling behind my bitter smile.

"What did you say to Lay, hah?! WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" He yelled at me. It hurt my heart so much. He never yelled at me before, yeah, untill he change like this. "What did you say?! Answer me!"

"I, I did'nt say anything to him!" I replied, try to not shaking my leg. "And, i have'nt see him!"

"Do not lie! If you don't say anything, then why he said that he want to end our relationship, huh?!" Kris look at me with anger in his eyes. "You said something about our relationship, right?!"

I bite my lips. Trying to not cry in front of my boyfriend. I clenched my hands.

"I really did'nt say anything. I'm not lying," I still try to hold my tears. "I never told him about our relationship. Because you said to me to don't talk everything about our relationship in front of Lay,"

He was silent for a moment. Trying to catch his breath. I clenched my hand more tightly.

"So what?! Why did he end my relationship with him? This is because of you, you stupid! In other way, he definitely know about my stupid relationship with a dumb like you! I shouldn't have been in touch with you!"

I'm speechless. I was trying to hold back my tears that have been begging to imposed. Indeed, perhaps this is not the first time he say this things to me, but, it still hurt as much as usual.

"S-Sorry, i'm stupid. I'm dumb. I'm sorry. Sorry," That's all i could say. I've don't know. It's run out from my mouth.

"Hhh! Shoo! Get in your room! Seeing your face just make me feel sick. Shoo!"

I gave him small nod. Then i hurried back to my own room and locked the door. 

I shut my mouth. Tears began to flow from my eyes.

I cried, for the umpteenth time. And the cause is same. Someone who named 'Wu Yi Fan'.

 


 

"Tao! Omo! Your body is just getting skinnier!"

I smiled weakly when i heard Luhan word's. Is all people aware that his body is get skinnier? But.. why is he didn't notice?

Ah. Yes. I forgot. He is doesn't care about me.

"I'm just don't want to eat, Lu. I always feel my stomach is full. So, i'm not hungry," I lied. Yeah, i lied. I don't want to make my friends worry about me.

"Do not lie, Huang Zi Tao," now Baekhyun times to talk. "We all know the reason."

I looked around. My friend eyes are full of concern to me. Luhan, Sehun, Baekhyun, Kai, D.O, and Suho. They're my bestfriends. 

I'm only chuckle to respond Baekhyun's words. Baekhyun was right. I'm not supposed to lie in front of my bestfriends.

"Tao, why don't you just move away from that house?" Suho voice interrupted my thoughts. "I... just can't stand to see you like this. I feel sorry for you, Tao."

"Yes, Suho was right," Chanyeol stare at Tao. "Where the figure of my sweet panda? Now there's only panda with his bitter smile. There is not joy that used to be."

"S-Sorry, i just.. can't do it," I hesitated a bit. "I just.. love Kris so much."

All sighed. I know, my reason is always like that. 'Love'. But that's it. That's the only reason I survived.

"Tao," Kai took a deep breath. "I didn't mean to underestimate you, but.. i think you're  strunggling in vain."

"Kris would never change. I know that. And i think it will not, if you just, just like this."

"What do you mean, Kai?" Luhan asked, before I can say the same words. I just, don't understand to what Kai mean with his words before.

"I mean, Tao is always weak and being soft in front of Kris. It fact, that is not the right attitude to face someone like Kris," Kai explains. "Tao must make some act. Fight or something. But i'm afraid. If Tao fight, Kris will angry and.. instead of change, he will worse to Tao hyung,"

Yes. That's the problem. That's what i'm afraid if i act against Kris. I'm afraid that he will do anything to make me cry or hurt or something. Maybe he'll do anything worse than what he do now.

"So, if Tao want to get off from all of this, he should..."

"What?" I stare at Suho, with curious face.

"Move away."

Two words from Suho make me quiet. Move away? I can't do that. I can't leave Kris just like that. Just because i don't want to feel hurt anymore. I can't do that. 

I know i'm blinded by love. But love is.. love, right? Love is have a pain on it. And love.. demands sacrifice. That's all i doing now. I feel pain, and i'm, sacrificing for my love.

"Suho," i said without stare at him. "How's Lay?"

Lay is one of my bestfriend, first. But, now.. i don't know. I heard he has a relationship with Kris, and that news just.. break our friendship. Lay choose to get out of my life and then.. there was none.

"Lay?" Suho sighed. "He never called me again after the accident. You know? Accident when he wants to break up with Kris. I think he embarassed or something. Maybe he still love Kris and regreting his decision."

It's no secret than Lay really likes Kris. And i really know, he actually forced to end his relationship with Kris. And that's probably because of.. me.

"Maybe Lay has want to recovering his brain," Luhan said, with a big smile on his face. "I'm suprised. Lay is know that Kris is become like that, but still approached him. Stupid Lay."

Actually i think Luhan is like talking about me. Or maybe it's just my imagination. I don't know.

"What time is it?" I asked. I feel i've been so long here.

"Umm..." D.O looks into his watch. "Ah, 12pm."

"12?!" I jump from my seat. I was shocked. "Kris told me that he would be at home at 1. What should i do?"

"Let me take you to home," Sehun pull out his voice. "Incidentally, i brought my motorcycle."

"Can I?" I stare at Sehun with my panda-eyes. 

"Of course," Sehun took a deep breath. "Come on. I dont want Kris angry with you, because you came late."

"Ah! Thanks, Sehun. You're so kind to me!" I smiled brightly at Sehun. "Emm, everyone. I'm going home, okay? See ya."

"Yap. Sehun, take care of my Tao! If anything happen to Tao, i would kill ya!"

"Hhh, you're so noisy, Baekhyun."

Sehun pull my hand. Shortly before actually leaving our meeting place, i saw the sad look at Luhan's face.

Or that just my imagination?

 


 

"We are here," said Sehun while his motorcycle stopped in front of my house. 

"Ahh, yes. Thanks, Sehunnie. You helped me so much." I smile proudly at Sehun. "I think Kris is hasn't at home."

"Yes. That is. Go into your house." Sehun smiled. "I going back home, okay?"

"Ne, be careful!"

After Sehun go, I hurried get back home. Fortunately. Looks like Kris isn't at home, yet.

"Where have you been, baby panda?"

I stop. I freeze.

Kris is at home. Right now. In front of me.

 

Continue...

 

How was the first chappie? I hope you liked it. I know that's so much grammatical error. Grammar is not into me. Gzz.

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yuuhee
#1
Chapter 1: Oh God !!! I Like this ! No. Love this !!! It's an interesting fict... >o<
I feel sorry to baby panda...
C'mon baby panda, just leave and change and make Kris head over heels to you...
Uhh,, can I request to Sehun to be baby panda's guardian ? Or Suho ? :D right. I want to make Kris regret to neglected baby panda... :D
and Kris, you jerk !

*Uught. Sorry for my bad grammars. Well, English isn't my main language.. So, this it.

Hope you update soon author-nim... Fighting ! :D
lemon-deulop #2
Chapter 1: Leave Tao, LEAVE RIGHT NOW... TT___TT
Baby Tao, Kris is so mean and inconsiderate... A jerk with no feelings, a manipulative, violent and stupid person. T___T I don't want Tao to be hurt some more.

Please update soon, yeah? I know you haven't in a while, but GO YOU c;
/becomes a cheerleader and chants G-O U./ x333
ItsMe_Angel
#3
poor taotao :,( Kris .... I have nothing nice to say to you. Update soon please!
kifalea #4
Chapter 1: Oh no no no ,,, is not love if if there's not mutual respect from each other ...
Baby Tao ,,, how would Kris respect you and valued you if yourself didn't ...
Love yourself before you love someone else ...
Tao darling you should to yourself ,"I'm woth it".
ArianaMaddi #5
This seems nice, I'll be waiting for you to update it ^^
LightOfTruth #6
Update soon, neh?