"Are you sure about this, Heechul?" I heard someone say from behind me. 

I rolled my eyes as I threw on my coat then made my way out the door, not bothering to answer the question i've been asked a hundred times already. Never before have I been so sure of something like this and it was about time everyone quit worrying about me.  

Things are different now. They had no reason to be concerned anymore. It wasn't difficult to see where each of the members concern was coming from, they're my brothers after all. They were there when things turned from bad to worse, but they also saw when things finally started to change for the better. It was a long process, but everything was fine now. This day was a long time coming, and I was ready for it. 

I walked down the street with determination in my step. My hands thrown into the pockets of my jacket, sunglasses covering my eyes. A light breeze brushed through my long dark hair as I went. After a few minutes I rounded a corner and entered the park that wasn't far from the apartment. Just beyond I could see the small take out restaurant and my eyes began to scan those sitting outside. As I got closer I found the face I was looking for. With a small twist in my stomach I kept going until I was seated across from the person I hadn't seen nor spoken to in years. 

He looked at me with a startled expression as I sat across from him, apparently his thoughts were elsewhere. "Heechul.." he said quietly, eyes wide as if not believing I was actually there.

Taking off my sunglasses I looked him in the eye. "Hangeng."

"I wasn't sure if you would actually show up."

"I said I would, didn't I?" I replied lazily. Hangeng remained silent, his eyes lowered from mine. "So why am I here?"

"How are you?" 

I smirked. Once upon a time if asked that question, my world would've been in shambles. Of course, i'd have lied and played off everything as just fine. But back then, Hangeng would've known better. He was never someone I could lie to. Sure, I could try to hide truths from him, but it never really worked. I knew this was a test of sorts; Everything from the words I spoke to the most subtle movements I make would be studied by him. "Since when, Hangeng? Since we broke up, since you left the group, or since you cut me from you life?"

The younger began to frown, but there was no way this was going to be easy for him. "I'm sorry."

"You should be." I replied blankly. 

"Look, I know it's been a long time and I know this isn't easy for anyone, but I can't not try. I miss you and I hate not having you in my life. Things were so crazy when we broke up, I just couldn't handle the pressure from the label and try to keep you happy at the same time. And I left for the same reason, I couldn't breathe anymore. Then walking out of your life altogether.." he paused, massaging his temples with his hands. "I was a fool. Breaking up with you and not keeping in touch with you… Those are the stupidest things i've ever done in my life, and I can't even begin to tell you how much I regret those decisions."

I slouched back in my seat, eyes wandering across the park as I let his words sink in. "You know… I waited a really long time to hear those words. At first everyone tried to convince me everything was just a phase, that you and I would get back together once you got your head on straight and you had your break from the spotlight." I looked back him. "I wanted to believe them, and kept wishing - even after we stopped talking - that someday I could hear those words." 

But you really have no idea what i've been through after all of these years. What I put my brothers through.

"Heechul-ah, I think you've had enough to drink." Eunhyuk said to me as he gathered the empty cans scattered around the living room.

"Oh, c'mon~" I slurred before gulping back the last of my current drink. 

"I'm serious." he said sternly. "Enough is enough. Look at all these empty cans, it's a mess in here."

" off, Hyukjae." I snapped, throwing my empty can at the dancer, making him flinch and drop some of the empty cans he had gathered. A cruel laugh escaped my lips.

"Hyung!" Ryeowook cried, jumping up from the chair he was sitting in. He'd been there for a while, quietly watching me with a sad expression upon his face but as usual I ignored him. It became routine for at least one of the members to keep an eye on me. It was annoying, therefore I simply ignored their presence. 

"What's going on?" another voice asked as a few members entered the living room. Donghae and Kyuhyun stood in the doorway looking concerned. "We heard a lot of noise." Kyuhyun said.

"Hyukkie? What's the matter?" Donghae rushed to his side. Eunhyuk was now kneeling on the floor with tears silently running down his cheeks as he picked up the dropped cans. The blonde just shook his head then glanced my way, his expression was broken. 

I looked at the two, the sight of them being so close irritated me. "Tsk."

Taking in the scene Kyuhyun crossed the room and stood next to me. "Woah, hyung. How much have you had to drink? You reek of alcohol."

"Yah!" I raised my voice, anger growing. "Why don't all of you just back off?"

Donghae glared at me as he helped Eunhyuk clean, keeping one of his arms wrapped around his best friends side. "You've gone too far, Heechul." he spat. "When are you going to give this up? Do you honestly think that getting drunk off your all the time is going to fix things?!" 

"I don't want to be here for this again.." Ryeowook whispered and left the room quickly. 

I stood up from my spot on the couch and wobbled on my feet. "How about this then." I snapped and pointed a finger across the room at each person. "How about all of you~ go yourselves and leave me the alone." I pushed my way past Kyuhyun and stormed out of the room into the kitchen. The only other thing I could recall from that night was grabbing a few more beer from the fridge and taking them to my bedroom where I would be found passed out later.

Hangeng's voice brought me back to the present. "You don't have to wait anymore then, Rella." My stomach tightened at the use of my nickname. I studied his face as he spoke, finding it hard to believe he was right here in front of me after all of this time. While on the other side of things, it was just as hard to imagine just how much time had passed us. How far we've come, how much we've changed. 

"You know, I can still remember when we met so clearly." he said as if reading where my thoughts were going. "I had met a few of the others and each of them warned me about you. I was so afraid to come face to face with the infamous Kim Heechul. You certainly lived up to being the diva they warned me about, yet you took me under your wing. You had my back and took care of me." He smiled.

"You were pretty helpless." I replied, remembering Hangeng's poor Korean and awkward social skills.

"Yeah, but I somehow managed to win you over, didn't I?"

"Mmm.." I hummed. "I guess once upon a time you did."

Silence swept between us, after a moment Hangeng leaned on the table, speaking softly. "I know I hurt you, Heechul, but do you think you could fall for me again?" 

You know you hurt me? I thought as the aftermath memories followed the recollection of the good times we once shared. 

"Heechul. Heechul wake up. Hey, wake up!" I felt someone shaking me, calling my name over and over. I struggled, swinging my arms and legs to fight off the hands touching me. My body shook when my eyes opened wide, a scream caught in my throat. It felt as if someone had cut off my oxygen supply, I gasped for air. "W-what's going on?" I panted.

"You're having another bad dream." I recognized the voice as Siwon. Blinking a few times my sight came in to focus. Siwon was sitting on the edge of my bed, his hands at either side of my shoulders holding me in place. "It's okay, hyung." He spoke softly, brushing my matted hair away from my face. 

"I-I.." I stuttered, trying to shake the dream from my mind. I shut my eyes for a moment, forcing a sense of composure and calming my breathing. "I'm fine."

The younger looked at me with a sad smile. He'd seen this plenty of times before, he knew it wasn't hard for me to put on this act. "You're not fine, hyung." He leaned forward and pulled me into his arms. "It's okay though, i'm here. It was just a bad dream."

I sat still, my body limp as I allowed him to hug me. Seconds later I heard my door creak and looked up to see Leeteuk entering. I pulled back from Siwon and cleared my throat. As if it wasn't bad enough to have one person worrying about me. "I'm fine, Teukie.."

The leader placed a hand on Siwon's shoulder. "Thank you, Siwon." he said warmly. "I'll take things from here, you go back to bed; You've got an early schedule tomorrow."

Siwon nodded and glanced at me once again before getting up and going back to his own room.

Leeteuk grabbed the corner of my blankets and lifted them. "Move over." he said, crawling under.

"What are you doing?" I asked, giving him some room. 

"Lying down with you." he replied, resting his head upon my pillow. 

"I don't want to talk about it." I mumbled. "I don't need anyone to stay with me, i'm okay." The eldest reached out, I felt him wrap an arm around me, pulling me close. "You don't have to hold me, i'm all sweaty. I really don't need comfort it was just a nightmare."

"I know, Heechul-ah." he whispered, ignoring my rejections. "But i'm sad, so I want to be with you. Comfort me."

I remained quiet. Of course Leeteuk was lying, but I was grateful. Without another word spoken I entangled myself in him, eventually falling into a dreamless sleep.

I closed my eyes and shook my head in a feeble attempt to dissolve the clutter of thoughts going through my mind. 

I won't be bitter though. I promised him that if I went through with today, then I wouldn't be cruel to Hangeng. 

I intended to keep that promise. 

My eyes opened when the brunette spoke again. "Please say something." the brunette asked.

Our eyes met. "Hangeng-" I started to speak but was cut short.

"Why do you keep calling me that…" his voice grew sad. "Why aren't you calling me Hannie?"

"Because Hannie is the man I fell in love with, and he's not here anymore." I replied bluntly. 

Hangeng's face became pained while tears finally escaped his eyes. "I miss us, Rella. I miss you. I'm never going to stop loving you, I never could…" 

"That bridge is burned, there is no 'us' anymore." A sigh escaped my lips. It's been a long time, things are so different, but there was no turning back. 

"Why." Hangeng sobbed and took hold of my hand, not caring if attention was drawn our way. "Why, Rella??"

"Because we're different people now. And I honestly don't even know who you are anymore." I glanced away from him once again, the sight of someone walking through the park catching my attention. I looked back at the younger man. "Hangeng, it's been over between us for a long time-"

The brunette raised his voice slightly as he cried harder. "It should have never ended between us!"

"I honestly never thought I could move on… I was truly in love with you." I continued and glanced towards park again, my lips curving slightly as the figure from before came closer. "But Hangeng, i'm not your Cinderella, and this isn't a fairy tale. If it was, we never would've broke up or lost the connection we once had. It took me a long time, but i've moved on; I have someone else, and it's your turn to learn and let go now." I kept my tone calm and softly pulled my hand out of his grasp before standing up.

I felt Hangeng's eyes on me as I walked away, I knew he continued to watch as I approached the other man in the park. "I did it." I said softly. Leeteuk smiled warmly at me. "And I kept my promise to you, too. I wasn't mean, I wasn't cruel, and i'm not bitter."

We walked across the park in silence, the afternoon repeating in my head. As the two of us reached the turn towards the apartment building I felt a hand brush against mine before our fingers laced together. "I'm really proud of you, Chulie. I know this wasn't easy for you."

A small smile came over my lips. "He deserved to have this conversation face to face." I replied. "I just honestly hope that someday he can get to the point i've finally made it to and be happy. He deserves to be happy, Teukie."

"You did the right thing. He has true closure now, and that's not something you could've given him through a phone call or text message. He might not see it now, but in time."

I sighed, content with my decisions made today and stopped walking and pulled the elders hand forcing him to do the same. Leeteuk turned and looked at me, question in his eyes. "Thank you." I whispered, taking the steps needed to remove the space between us. I wrapped my arms around his waste, hugging him closely. "Thank you for everything, my angel."

"You don't have to thank-" 

Leeteuk never got to finish his sentence as I captured his lips with my own. The kiss was gentle and full of emotion, a sigh left his lips as we broke apart. "Just let me say thank you this once, okay?" 

The dimple on his face appeared as he smiled back at me. "Okay, Heechul-ah."

"I love you, Teukie." I kissed him again. 

Affection sparkled in his eyes as he replied. "I love you too."

It took a long time to get to this point. Letting the memories bring smiles instead of tears and to let go of the first man I fell in love with. Hannie was my past, and the reason I was able to discover my future. I glanced at Leeteuk as we continued walking home together, thankful to have this angel by my side.

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Well, there it is! Not overly sad, not overly happy. Like I said in the forward I might try to write a 'prequel' to this. I have a few ideas for it and might give it a shot.

I know the ending to this one was pretty cheesy (well, they always are, aren't they?) buuut I just fail at endings. :3

Anywho, hope you guys liked it!

Ps. Please let me know if you're interested in the prequel. I'll probably post a note on this story when/if I post it. Cheers!

Pss. Seems to be the common reply that people want Teukchul in the prequel, not Hanchul.

Here's my 'plan' (if you want to call it that xD): I want to base the prequel AFTER Hanchul broke up. Basically, it'll be the hard times that our dearest diva has gone through which leads up to this story. Which could only mean our lovely Teukchul couple has to be formed in the prequel, right? ^_^ Now you know.

Also. Some of you are saying I should do a sequel for Teukchul as well - the only thing I can say to that is 'maybe' for now. I'll try my best and will definitely give it my all if the inspiration strikes me, that much i'll promise.

(For those who i'm making sad with my unhappy Hanchul, no worries, i'll write happy fics for them in the future too!)

Okay! Thank you everyone for reading and to those who take the time to comment, it means so much to me! Please keep the feedback coming! <3