I love this fanfiction. It is about mere teenage love story where Siwon and Donghae as main characters. It is beautiful. It is angsty, but it is beautiful. Full of straight words and sense of humor. Full of naive and melting SiHae moments from the awkward, the sweet, until the y ones.

I love this fanfiction. I kind of forget how did I start ship SiHae, but I am positive that this fanfiction was one of the biggest causes. This fanfiction is not perfect. In fact, there are still some grammar errors. But the story, the way the author wrote it, the way the author described Donghae’s point of view, made me irresistibly fall in love with this fanfiction. I could see the sincerity, how genius the author is, and how much the author loved SiHae through this fanfiction.

I know it sounds exaggerate, but this fanfiction has moved me in some ways. I couldn not help but reading all over it again and again and again and again as if I am having cancer and this fanfiction is my routine medicine. I have read other amazing Sihae fanfictions, but I put this one in my heart.

I am tired of reading on PC screen, so I printed it as a eight one-pages novel book. For a couple days I kept holding the book and reading it all the time; while watching TV, eating food and snacks, and even before I got to bed. Yes, I claimed it as a wonderful fairytale so I could have beautiful dreams in my sleep. Not only that. Every time I feel sad and a little disbelieved in love, I re-read this fanfiction and it always succeeded to cheer me up again.

However, I have to be sad for some particular reasons about this fanfiction. I kept praying and hoping that it will turn as I expected, but I think it will never happen. First, this fanfiction is not ended yet (or the author claimed it ON-HOLD) so I can say the story is endless. Second, I doubt the beloved author has desire to continue it, at least in this short time. It is because the author has left the fandom (that is what I heard). The author still likes SiHae, but it is not as much and deep as the author did at the past.

I am not being rude. I am just missing this fanfiction and maybe already too much. Maybe because the story of this fanfiction is getting personal for me. Sounds desperate? Well I am. While holding this yearn, I keep the printing of this fanfiction well and start dreaming again. That is what I best at.

The Bird and the Fish: Losing My Innocence