And Drew Them Together...
The Stockholm Syndrome
“I have had it!”, Hwayoung exasperated while leaning forward to rest her hands on her knees. The February summer in Australia her energy. She got herself on a walkathon through the streets of Brisbane with Taehyung who was b with enthusiasm.
With an innocent smile on his face, he handed her a drink which read organic and gluten free on the label. He, then innocently asked, “Isn’t it supposed to rain in here?”
Hwayoung’s glare curbed his smile. “How come of all places… she is here, in my neighbourhood?”
“Fate. I guess…”, he responded grinning.
“Don’t make me laugh…” Hwayoung scoffed. “If it’s a fate, she should have been in YOUR neighbourhood or… at least in a neighbouring country…”
Taehyung cleared his throat and looked around evading her words.
Sighing out loud, Hwayoung sat on a bench and asked, “You came yesterday… you’re leaving tomorrow… With what confidence did you come here? Did your agency really believe your lies… that you’re here for sightseeing? For just two days?”
“I don’t know”, he said taking his seat beside her on the bench.
His single reply to her multiple questions which doesn’t even qualify as an answer triggered Hwayoung. “Walking endlessly… my knees have gone for a sixer… Even I feel my head splitting… At least now, call her and ask about details… like how does your stay look like? Does it have a rooftop swimming pool or not? Is there any park or mall? Any landmark nearby? Find out some relevant clues?”
“Why should we beat around the bush? I can ask her directly…”, he said overflowing with confidence.
Hwayoung’s eyes widened at his courage. “Then do so!”
“I can so… But there is one thing that’s missing?”
“An excuse? We can make up som-”
He shook his head in denial, “Her number…”, his dispirited voice spoke.
“You don’t have her number?!”, Hwayoung riled up. “Have you really come with the idea of sight-seeing?”
“Who knew your neighbourhood would be this big…”, he spoke, with his eyes always on the lookout even while resting on the bench.
On seeing his persistence, Hwayoung said smiling, “But guys like you will definitely win! Coz, luck favours the brave!”
Taehyung gave a quick smile at her comforting words and fiddled with the camera on his hand while Hwayoung had her drink.
Inhaling in the dry afternoon scent of the food street, lending his ears to the breeze that gently brushed off his fringes, his hands that held the camera pressed the shutter which captured the free pet dog under leash. The instant the shutter sounded, he got up instantly which startled Hwayoung.
“What day is today?”, Taehyung asked Hwayoung with a known smile.
“Saturday…?”
“Mm-Hm”, he shook his head in denial saying, “It’s a weekend… means it’s a holiday”
Hwayoung was not pleased with his synonyms for ‘Saturday’ and gave him a straight face saying, “So?”
“Sohyun usually visit pet’s café during her days off… So…”, he said zestfully.
“There are more cafés in here than houses…”
“What about pet café? A famous or a big one in here?”, he raised his brows.
While he started his café hunt, Sohyun who came out to have a breath of fresh air soon found herself among the photoshoot staff gathering. After two weeks of photoshoot, she thought she had her own day with Mongsuk, her pet dog, but it went down the drain. It wasn’t that she didn’t enjoy their company, but she couldn’t hide her disappointment, at the disposal of her plans. Soon, she and Mongsuk got used to the atmosphere and felt themselves at ease. The joy of her dog’s caress at on her feet felt enough for her.
As minutes rolled on, she found herself smiling at their words. Suddenly, she felt a moment which enveloped her like a mother. At the 10 degree turn of her sight, she saw him, smiling through his eyes… so endearingly. To her the emotions that raised at that moment wasn’t uncomfortable but overwhelming to bear. Her chest tightened, heartrate was at its peak and her breath stopped instantly. She shut her eyes tightly and opened to shake off the image of him drawn by her mind, but the reality struck her. Her eyes fell on his dishevelled hair, tired eyes behind the lens less glass and warm smile. Unable to move away from her seat and unable to tear her eyes away from him, she just looked at him with incredulity. ‘If it was our college days, I would’ve rushed to you and inquired about your health…”, the unspoken thoughts shared her concern for him.
Unaware of Taehyung’s presence, everyone except Sohyun were so engrossed in their own world of chitchat.
Their gaze stayed locked for a second longer, before she averted her eyes breaking the gaze on gathering her senses back.
Not making his presence known to others, he stood in the queue trying his best to hide himself in the well-lit room. While the queue faced forward, he angled towards her and stood wearing a smile hesitantly. At that time, Hwayoung who was witnessing his act from a few feet away, rushed towards him and tugged his arm whispering, “Let’s move… before the staff notice…”
Yielding to her words, he looked at Sohyun and mouthed, “I’ll wait outside!”
Seeing him still standing in the queue with his eyes fixated on her, Hwayoung dragged him outside.
As he left her sight, she sat frozen not believing her eyes. Many came and went through the path he walked but his trace stayed inert within her. The short duration of his appearance shook her entire being.
At each tick of the clock, she felt restless. As the noon was about to welcome the evening, the staff started to disperse. Amidst them, Sohyun took her leave with Mongsuk.
As she stepped out of the café into the park in front, she found Taehyung waving at her with a smile in his lips and fear of rejection in his eyes. Looking around to check if anyone is noticing them, she approached Taehyung while tucking her hair behind her ears. Sohyun bowed greeting Hwayoung and in turn got engulfed in an embrace. “So pretty! So glad to see you!”, Hwayoung exclaimed and released her from the hug. “I’m so glad to see you to unni!”, she shared her joy. But, with Taehyung it was a sharp stare. And he immediately evaded her glare by averting his eyes at Mongsuk. With a kind eyes, he crouched down petting her dog and immediately got on Mongsuk’s good side.
Hwayoung cleared reminding him the purpose of his visit.
Receiving her signal, he rose on his feet and directed at Hwayoung saying, “Won’t you leave?”
Hwayoung breathed in the bitterness and went for a walk around the park muttering, “Just say, ‘Why don’t you go for a walk’, instead of coming on strongly with your bare thoughts!”
After Hwayoung left the frame, Taehyung took a step towards her and stood in the silence and stillness.
Sohyun inhaled in deeply and softly muttered, “I can’t believe you’re here… I never knew. So unexpected…” As he conveyed his reply through silence, she asked, “Is this coincidence?”
He smiled and shook his head. And started with the ‘off the timing’ greeting, “Hi, Sohyun-ah…”
With the evident shock in her eyes, she listened quietly with a short smile in the corner of her lips.
“Sorry… I was going mad. Maybe I confessed my love much too fast…”, he spoke carefully. “I knew you’d be surprised. I came searching for you just to apologise… I’m sorry”, his low voice relayed how much he meant every word.
His words took her aback, and all that she could utter was, “Oh…”
Before she could gather herself, a voice calling her name startled them. “Miss Sohyun?”, a weak and wavery voice of an elderly woman sounded. Approaching them steadily and slowly with curious eyes on Taehyung, the grandma asked, “Who is this?”
While Taehyung flustered, Sohyun answered calmly, “Kim Taehyung, my friend back in Korea…”
“I see…”, grandma sang while nodding.
Sohyun turned towards Taehyung, “This is Mrs. Mia… I’m currently staying at her dorm”
Taehyung reached out for a handshake while introducing himself, “Hello Mrs. Mia, I’m Kim Taehyung. You can call me Tae!”
“G’day”, she said and gave him a warm smile. “You look stuffed… why don’t you come home and have dinner?”, she said on seeing his tired eyes.
“Huh?”, Taehyung baffled at the sudden invite.
“Ms. Sohyun, I’m leaving him in your responsibility, so bring him home”, she prompted. And only after receiving Sohyun assuring word, she made her way towards the dorm.
Sohyun pointed towards a building in the corner of the street saying, “That’s the dorm… Come over with Hwayoung unni and have dinner”
“Are you sure? Do you want me to…”, Taehyung asked, worrying that his presence might burden her and raise suspicion.
“No problem. Come for dinner, I’ll take care”, she assured and took off after throwing him a smile.
Rather than her words, her smile was more reassuring to me. There was something in that smile, in her words that told me that she was glad to meet me. The 4 minutes of wait for Hwayoung and those 4 minutes of distance from Sohyun, made me restless. Hwayoung warned me that they invited us only for dinner, but my heart which don’t speak actually told me the otherwise… an invite to be near her for long… or forever if I get lucky.
We got to her dorm and I really don’t remember how I got there. All I saw was the distance between me and that building… Not remote but not approachable… like her.
We were welcomed warmly by grandma and… Sohyun… she welcomed me with, “Do you have difficultly in finding the way?”, with a smile… a short smile in the corner of her lips… the meaning of which is something I could never comprehend till now.
As I expected, the dinner table had the entire dormmates. Except grandma and Sohyun, everyone else were six-footer men in that dorm. While some sat with their cell phones and head phones, few came with interesting stories. Sohyun spoke something too… but nothing went to my mind except her voice and picture.
After the dinner, we got a chance to speak in private. On the widespread grass, she stood with her hands crossed. The glint in her eyes told me to prepare for the war of words.
“With what guts you thought you’d find me?”
“I did… didn’t I? But it took almost two days…”, what mattered to me was being able to meet her, and I thought she’d understand that without being spelt aloud.
“Why did you come here?”, she asked feigning innocence.
“I told you… I came here to apologise… I thought you’re angry”
“I am angry”, she spoke curtly.
“I know… but don’t take it to heart” I also added what I feared the most, “And… Don’t be without talking to me”
“Ok… I won’t take you and what you said seriously…”
I never wanted it and she knew that but… yet she spelled it out. “You don’t have to take what I said last month seriously… Let me tell you now, I’m crazy about you” Her reaction embodied all the synonyms for ‘surprised’ because she never asked for it… yet I gave it, my honesty!
Her silence worried me.
“In a city where I lived for 22 years, I’m not able to live for a moment without you! So, I came here”, I poured out my reason thinking it would be subtle expression of my feelings.
She calmly explained, “Our career will take a wrong turn, if you continue to be like that.”
“It’s not of a great concern now a days… Many idols and actr-”
“It is!”, she said firmly, “…you don’t understand”
The one thing that stopped us was her convictions and it frustrated me, coz I couldn’t refute it.
“Above all these… do you think we will be in a relationship… again?”
“Now, you’re talking sense…”, I told her, but I don’t have the answer for that. I didn’t want to make the same mistake by professing my love. And the only thing that was on my mind was not to lose sight of her. With a lot of thinking, I finally blurted out, “Ok… let’s be friends”
She arched her brows which was soon gonna bend my future.
I tried to convince her and myself, “Let’s not think of love… Let’s meet and talk whenever we find time… Friends, that all!”
“Ok… Friends”, her short agreement sounded.
The smile and the simple words that she threw at me, got me stuttering, “huh?... Oh! Friends!”
We sat down on the couch in the balcony and talked. With the meekness of the short vowel and whiff of the long vowel, she played a love song in my head, though in reality, she just talked. But all I felt was our chemistry, I don’t know if she felt it too. I had my camera with me… the starry night and the night view was tempting to snap a pic, but she before me was more alluring.
Seeing myself with her… Some kind of ecstasy flowed which provided depths. Though I do not belong with those depths, I dwelled in them. I looked at myself as someone else, not with any reason, just naturally, with clarity like that of a sunray.
We shared the changes our lives in the past two years… and our numbers. The fingers that typed in her number and the moment I tapped on the save moment were unforgettable. There was no need to attach any words beside her name while saving, coz she’ll be the only ‘Kim Sohyun’ in my life.
She then asked me something that really took me back. “Why do you still like me?”, she questioned out of nowhere. “You said ‘I’m crazy about you’, why? Is it the way I look? Just that?”
A smirk escaped my lips, and I told her, “Can’t tell you all that. You’ll know when you hear my first very own song”
“I know, it’s weird of me to ask that question. But… one needs courage to confess their love… your perseverance to go to another country…just-”
I didn’t think that it was weird. Actually, I was happy that she asked me such question… not that I had the best answer… it was good to know that she is aware of my love for her. I didn’t tell her that but, “It is the matter of the heart… My heart and mind conspired together and brought me here…”
“So, you write lyrics now?”
“And you look very beautiful…”, I confessed it being one of the reasons.
“That’s a lot of flirting after just a simple hello!”
That was a warning… But I couldn’t stop, “When I saw you in the award function… cross my heart, the moon above faded in its glow. My heart just flipped!”
She laughed at those words… I suddenly remembered how I loved making her laugh. This moment where I made her laugh, after a painful separation, will go down in my history of accomplishments.
“I bet many would’ve flirted with you… I read many articles… You were the ideal type of many celebrities…”
The smile that lingered in her lips as a response gave me the confidence. she spoke, “I read that too… but no one confessed to me…”
“Really?”
“Maybe they haven’t seen me through your eyes!”
“Glad you understand how I see you… And who is writing the lyrics now? Those lines will be in my song…”
She covered her face and laughed. Embarrassment? Shyness? I don’t know, but my eyes refused to leave her. Gathering herself she spoke, “That’s my line… You can’t use it without my permission. You have to pay me for it!”
“Sure… Anything for you.”
“And don’t forget… we agreed to be friends”, she warned again.
“I just wanted to tell you what I felt… but, friends…” But what else can I say? Friendship was not the only thing I looked for in her, but at that time I just wanted an excuse to see her, talk to her and spend some time with her. And I guess, the word ‘friends’, gave it all…
Author’s thoughts:
Hello! How have you been?
Valentine’s day is just around the corner (Should I sigh or smile?)
Please forgive the clichés in here… I tried my best to avoid it but…
Chapter Pic: Credits in the pic.
For taeso shippers:
I found an Instagram account vsohyun12, it has some analysis on BTS’s new song scenery (V’s lyrics it seems). It was amusing :) Have fun reading the post :)
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