Chapter 9

arcade

«Small-town girl in a big arcade, she got addicted to a losing game.»

— Duncan Laurence

♫♩ ♫♩ ♫♩ ♫♩

Dahyun hasn’t been to many parties. She knows that drinking games and dancing are involved. And that people go to parties to have a good time, hang out with friends and such. But other than that, Dahyun doesn’t know much.

So when Dahyun asks her older brother, who’s a university student and has been to a number of parties (so he should have some sort of knowledge about them), what she’s supposed to wear, he just shrugs his shoulders, saying a t-shirt and jeans will do fine.

Dahyun frowns, thinking there must be more to it than that. At least, that’s how it is in the movies: Girls get ready by putting on makeup and wearing short dresses, boys style their hair and use cologne. But then movies have never been right — a romanticised version of what real life truly is.

She goes up to her room, sits on her bed, reads for a while to distract herself. Her phone buzzes, but Dahyun doesn’t bother to check it. The sun has set, the moon blooms like a midnight flower above the small town.

Winter is finally here. The air is bitingly cold and frost creeps up your arms. Soon there’ll be snow, perhaps tonight Dahyun muses, and the streets will be covered in white. But the first snow never lasts that long. It usually takes a couple of snowfalls before the town’s completely covered. And Dahyun thinks the only time the town she lives in is beautiful is when the entire town’s covered with snow.

Dahyun gets up from the bed an hour later, her eyes find the keyboard, which is placed in front of the window, she turns it on, plays a chord, then another — and something just happens: Music spills from her fingertips like running water. It continues, Dahyun isn’t really thinking, then, then—

It all stops. Dahyun stares out the window. She only sees the flickering light coming from her neighbours’ houses. Her eyes slowly drift upwards: The sky is almost empty, the moon has little company tonight. Dahyun’s head is empty, or perhaps there’s so much going on that Dahyun can’t focus on one single thing. She sighs.

A loud knock comes from the front door. Dahyun knows just from the sound of the knock that it’s Chaeyoung, and probably Tzuyu. Dahyun’s father answers. Dahyun can hear him talking, and then Chaeyoung and Tzuyu come bounding up the stairs to Dahyun’s room. They fling themselves down onto Dahyun’s bed, and Dahyun smiles at them, shaking her head.

Chaeyoung’s wearing a green sweatshirt with some kind of print on it and black jeans. Her lips are tinted pink, her short brown hair’s parted in the middle, suddenly Dahyun understands why Chaeyoung has so many admirers at school. Tzuyu doesn’t look like she dressed up, but Dahyun thinks she’s still pretty, but then again Tzuyu’s always been like that.

Dahyun goes to turn off the keyboard, she catches sight of herself in the mirror, she thinks she looks a mess. Dahyun turns to Chaeyoung and Tzuyu, asking them if she should change clothes. Chaeyoung shakes her head, eager to go, Tzuyu eyes Dahyun’s red checkered trousers and t-shirt, then shrugs. Dahyun tries not to give it much thought, it’s probably for the best if she doesn’t overthink the entire thing, and grabs her old beige coat from her closet, the one with the really nice collar.

It’s cold, and quiet, and dark, and Dahyun regrets not bringing mittens or something to cover her hands, even sticking her hands in her pockets doesn’t do much. They don’t get a lot of stars in the sky because of light pollution, they’re all hidden away. But sometimes, on certain nights, a few stars come out to dance and play.

She thinks the stars are watching her. And Dahyun wonders what makes them want to watch. There’s not much on earth, just a lot of conflict, indifference, arrogance, but there’s got to be something that makes watching worth while — there has to be.

They walk past the town square to a more affluent neighbourhood where the party is being hosted. The houses there are bigger, the streets cleaner, the cars sleeker, and the people more ignorant of the plight of those who can’t afford such luxurious things.

Dahyun begins to think about the party; who’ll be there, and then suddenly her thoughts jump to Sana. Dahyun panics.

«How’d you get invited?» Dahyun asks, trying to get rid of the thought that Sana might also be at the party (the thought only makes Dahyun nervous, a part of Dahyun hopes Sana’s not at the party, because she won’t know what to do then).

«Mina invited me, she said I could bring a couple of friends.» Chaeyoung shrugs, popping a piece of pink and blue candy into — the ones shaped like little Coca-Cola bottles, the sour ones that make your mouth dry and tingly. Chaeyoung offers the bag of candy to Dahyun and Tzuyu. «You know Mina, right?»

«Yeah, she dances. I played the piano for her solo once, a few years ago. I never really talked to her.» Dahyun says, gaze cast down.

«She’s not much of a talker, but she’s really nice. You’d like her once you get to know her.» Chaeyoung says with a bounce in her step, smiling.

«Do you…» Dahyun begins carefully, «do you know any of her friends?»

Chaeyoung blinks, thinking. «Well, there’s Nayeon, who you know, and Jeongyeon, the girl with the short hair, kind of like mine. Mina says they bicker a lot. And there’s Jihyo, who’s on the student council. Remember her? She ran for president but didn’t win. She ended up becoming VP, though…» Chaeyoung says, then grabs Dahyun’s arm, struck by an epiphany. «Oh! And then there’s Momo and Sana! Momo is in the same dance class as Mina! Sana, wait! Doesn’t she play the cello? Yeah! For the youth orchestra that you’re in!» Chaeyoung eyes Dahyun, raising an eyebrow. «You know her?»

«Who? Sana?» Dahyun tries not to panic. «Kind of, I guess.» She shrugs. «We’re not really friends.»

Chaeyoung stares.

Dahyun’s eyes go wide, she fumbles. «I mean, we talk sometimes, and she’s sweet, a bit shy, but sweet and kind…and…»

«I heard Sana’s really talented in music and that she’s applied for a university overseas.»

«Yeah, I think it was somewhere in Europe?» Tzuyu adds.

«Was it London?»

«Maybe. I thought she was thinking about Helsinki as well…»

«That’s in Finland, right?» Chaeyoung whistles, impressed. «Wow, that’s far away from home. Kind of brave of her wanting to study overseas…»

Dahyun blanches, almost stopping her tracks. A sudden sadness pools in her stomach. She feels heavy, overcome with something inexplicably painful. She looks away, trying not to be bothered by it, because it shouldn’t bother Dahyun — it shouldn’t bother her that Sana’s going to leave town and chase her dreams.

She should be happy for Sana and the opportunities that come her way, because Sana’s kind, and good, and perfect in every way, and deserves happiness and success. But Dahyun doesn’t know what to think. Because she doesn’t really want Sana to leave, but then again, Dahyun barely knows Sana — and who would she be if she didn’t want the best for Sana?

«Oh.» Is all Dahyun can say, rather hopelessly. «Good for her.»

«What’re your plans?» Chaeyoung asks. «You going to study music as well?»

Dahyun shrugs in response, then spots the house in the distance and points at it. She can hear the music all the way down at the bottom of the street where they’re standing. There are more people than she thought there would be. Dahyun’s heart sinks, she can’t stop thinking about Sana. She sighs, then gathers enough courage to follow her friends into the house.

Dahyun’s never really considered herself brave but she has got a lot of guts, she’ll stand for what she believes in with a vigorous passion (that some might mistake for bravery). She hasn’t been to many parties but somehow knows how to mingle (and sometimes she knows how to blend into a crowd as well, which comes in handy at times). What Dahyun doesn’t like, is the taste of Jägermeister mixed with red bull, or gin mixed with fruit-flavoured squash. She doesn’t like Snakebite (because it’s too sweet for her). Its all foreign on her tongue and makes her want to retch, so she sticks to drinking sprite from a red plastic cup, and everybody at the party asks if she’s drinking water, calling her boring.

The air is thick and stuffy around her, Dahyun pulls at the collar of her thin turtleneck t-shirt. She has already lost sight of Chaeyoung, but Dahyun’s more worried about Tzuyu, knowing that this sort of thing isn’t really her scene.

Dahyun’s head begins to throb from the loud music. That’s the thing about being a classically trained musician: One listens to music differently, hears sections that others can’t, sometimes one can’t help but feel the music, and that’s when the sadness comes in waves, or the happiness tickles one’s skin like one’s being touched by sunlight. Dahyun sees things as well, images that just pop into her head. It’s exhausting and Dahyun hasn’t learned how to stop it from happening.

She escapes to the living room where some people are crowded around a plastic table playing beer pong. There’s a couch in the corner of the room. Dahyun sees Nayeon trying to fit onto the couch with four other girls. Dahyun looks away and attempts to sneak out, but then someone’s grabbed hold of Dahyun’s shoulder, yanking her backwards. Dahyun stumbles into Nayeon, who’s smirking at her.

«Hey you, where do you think you’re going?» Nayeon says.

«Hi.» Dahyun breathes, a bit startled, a bit worried. «I was gonna get more to drink.» Dahyun lies.

Nayeon’s not drunk, but she isn’t sober either. Nayeon flings her arms around Dahyun’s neck and drags her over to the corner towards her group of friends. She makes Dahyun sit down in a chair and introduces her to the group.

Dahyun knows all of them: Momo’s sitting with her legs slung over Jeongyeon’s lap. Mina, who’s squished between Jeongyeon and the vice president, Jihyo, smiles shyly at Dahyun and Dahyun waves back, Dahyun’s other hand squeezes the red plastic cup out of nervousness. Then there’s Sana, who’s sitting on the edge of the couch, and Dahyun averts her gaze.

Sana’s stunning. Dahyun downs the rest of the Sprite, then stares at the bottom of her cup. The chair’s too high for her, her feet don’t touch the floor. She swings her legs, not knowing what to do.

«You’re Dahyun, right?» The vice president shouts so loudly Dahyun thinks the walls actually shake. «Nayeon’s friend?»

«She’s also my friend!» Sana exclaims, pouting.

The vice president, Jihyo, lets out a loud laugh, then takes a swig from her can of beer, looking a bit too smug.

Dahyun swallows, feeling like she’s being interrogated. «Hi, I’m Dahyun, I’m a second year.»

«You play the piano, don’t you? Nayeon talks about you, says you’re timid in a cute kind of way. And don’t you play in the orchestra with Sana? Sana here won’t stop talking about you sometimes, sounds like she’s a bit jealous of your musical skill.» Momo says with a smile and sits up straight, pulling her legs off Jeongyeon’s lap. Jeongyeon breathes a sigh of relief and Mina giggles, covering with her hand.

Dahyun steals a quick glance at Sana, but Sana’s not looking at her; she’s not looking at anyone but at the floor with disinterest, almost like she’s shy or embarrassed. Her cheeks are tinted pink and Dahyun can’t help but think how pretty Sana is. Dahyun looks back at Momo, then nods.

«So you like classical music? Do you listen to Mozart? Beethoven? Vivaldi?» Jeongyeon asks, tilting her head.

«Debussy! Clair de Lune! Can you play that? Mina and I danced to it once!» Momo says rather enthusiastically, nodding her head.

«I think classical music is cool, but I listen to a lot of other stuff as well. Pop, rock, jazz, film music is also nice.» Dahyun tells Jeongyeon, then turns to Momo, «I have played it, but it was far from perfect, it’s a very difficult piece to master.»

«It sounds choppy.» Jeongyeon comments.

«It’s because of the time it was written in… The European Impressionism… I like Saint-Saëns, his stuff is good, emotional, and I like Elgar’s Salut d’Amour, those are nice pieces, if you want any classical recommendations…» Dahyun says, biting her lip, hoping to start an easy conversation that she can steer and control, but Jeongyeon looks down into her cup, and Dahyun’s heart clenches in her chest.

Did Dahyun say something wrong? Is the subject of classical music boring?

«Huh.» Jeongyeon shrugs. «I guess that makes sense. Don’t know much about music history or theory, though.»

They continue to talk about music, and Dahyun tries to find a way to ask Sana about studying music but the perfect timenever arrives so the question lingers on the tip of her tongue but it never quite slips out. They talk about school and their annoying teachers, sometimes they ask Dahyun easy questions, like what her favourite subject is and if she likes studying, and Dahyun answers quietly, despite the lump in .

Dahyun knows they’re trying to be polite, but she feels like she’s intruding and tries to leave when the others are busy talking about third year stuff. But then Nayeon grabs Dahyun’s attention, flailing her arms, and Dahyun stays rooted to the chair, eyes wide with shock.

Nayeon’s mouth is open in a wide smile as she points to Mina, wriggling her eyebrows. At first Dahyun doesn’t understand, but then she does, and her stomach drops. Dahyun frowns, irritated, then shakes her head slowly. Nayeon then points at Momo, Dahyun rolls her eyes, shaking her head again. By the time Nayeon has gotten to Sana, Dahyun’s already left the living room.

She finds Tzuyu on her own, watching Chaeyoung playing beer pong with some rowdy third years who are beyond drunk. Dahyun asks if Tzuyu’s all right, if she wants to go outside. Tzuyu just shakes her head, saying it’s fun to watch Chaeyoung fail at beer pong. But then Tzuyu says it’s even more fun to watch her finally get the ping pong ball into the cup. And when Chaeyoung finally does, she cheers, turns and high fives Tzuyu triumphantly.

«Oh! You’re here! Where’d you go?» Chaeyoung yells over the music when she spots Dahyun.

Dahyun shrugs, then turns to point at the couch in the corner of the living room where Nayeon and her group of friends are.

«Nayeon made me— » is all Dahyun manages to say before Chaeyoung’s dragging her back to the couch again.

Dahyun tries not to look at Sana. She knows she’s okay then, she knows she’ll be all right if she keeps away. But when Dahyun does look up, because she’s curious and she can’t fight the feeling tugging at her chest, her breath hitches, goes dry, the room spins, the voices fade out.

Sana’s too pretty, too beautiful, too stunning, and it makes Dahyun’s heart pound. The thoughts raging in her mind threaten to tumble out of . She wants to tell Sana everything: That she has feelings for her, that she just wants to hold her hand, that she wants to caress her cheek and taste her lips.

Dahyun’s chest clenches, and it feels like someone’s wrapped their fist around her heart. She doesn’t understand the physical sensations of being so… so… enamoured of someone. She doesn’t understand that sometimes it can hurt, but then other times it makes her feel good and gives the illusion that nothing can ever touch her — not the flames of a raging fire, not the biting cold — she’s invincible (but Dahyun still feels so vulnerable).

She’s never felt so strongly about someone, and the thought that it might actually be love has hit her so many times that she has started to believe it. 

Dahyun’s in love with Sana.

And Dahyun’s so afraid, so scared, because she knows it might not work, and no matter how kind or understating Sana is, Sana might not… be… the same as Dahyun… and that hurts… more than Dahyun thinks it should.

But then there’s the thought that it might work, that little glimmer of hope, and if it does work out, Dahyun knows she would pour out all of her love just to keep the relationship intact — but that’s not love.

That’s devotion.

(And to love someone without them loving you back is a losing game. But Dahyun doesn’t know that yet. And hopefully she’ll never have to know, never have to play a losing game. Hopefully someone’ll love her back.)

The group laughs, Dahyun looks down at her nearly empty cup. When her eyes flicker up for just a moment, she sees Mina and Chaeyoung a bit too close on the couch, Tzuyu’s sitting awkwardly beside Chaeyoung, eyes cast down and hands folded neatly in her lap.

Then Dahyun’s eyes stray to Sana. Dahyun’s breath catches in when she sees Sana gazing in her direction. And Sana’s got that look, but then, as if by a miracle, Dahyun sees right through it: Sana looks nervous, small, like she wants to run away.

And Dahyun wants to run away as well, and she thinks, like a fool, that maybe they could run away together.

Dahyun’s heart is beating so rapidly it might just jump out of her chest. She gives Sana a small smile, lifting her cup, thinking she’ll look cool, then downs the rest of her Sprite. Sana gives her a small smile, then shakes her head and comes to sit in an empty chair beside her.

Dahyun hadn’t meant for this to happen and panics, eyes wide. Sana carefully plucks the cup out of Dahyun’s hand, then places it on the ground.

«How’re you feeling?» Sana asks quietly, leaning in a bit too close, but Dahyun doesn’t move away. 

Sana smells like flowers tonight, and her eyes are dark like the sky outside, but her irises — Dahyun thinks they shine like the moon.

Dahyun shrinks a little, looking a bit sheepish. «I’m fine.» Dahyun says quietly. «I’m not drinking.»

«Oh.» Is all Sana says, leaning back. «Sorry, I thought, hmm, you were just acting a bit weird.»

«I? What?» Dahyun’s confused. Does that mean Sana’s been watching her for the past thirty minutes? «Sorry, I didn’t meant to, uh, worry you.» Dahyun mutters.

Sana shakes her head, then smiles. «No, it’s all right. I shouldn’t have made any assumptions.»

«What?» Dahyun doesn’t understand what’s going on at this point. Her head’s throbbing, Sana’s words swirl around her like a hurricane and Dahyun’s stuck in the storm.

Sana’s watching her carefully, tilting her head. Her cheeks are slightly red, perhaps from drinking, and her lips are a light pink. And Dahyun wants to reach out, cup her cheek, lean in and—

Dahyun catches herself before she does anything and looks down into her empty cup. «You’re studying overseas?» She says with a sadness that she can’t explain.

Sana blinks. «Who told you?»

«Chaeyoung told me…» Dahyun says slowly, not knowing if she’s actually supposed to know. «You’re thinking of pursuing a career in music?»

Sana nods, ducking her head, looking down shyly.

«I think that’s cool, if that’s what you want to do.»

«Really?» Sana says, breathless, eyes wide, lips parted.

«Yeah, I mean, you’ve got it figured out. I know a lot of people who have no idea about their future, but then again, a lot of those people say they want to be engineers or doctors, but that’s just because they don’t know for sure yet. I mean, that’s fine, but you should choose something you’re interested in, something you can invest your time and energy into without regretting it later.» Dahyun says without looking at Sana. It makes talking easier, but it doesn’t necessarily make Dahyun any braver. «In a way, it’s inspiring to see you make choices based on what you want. It makes me want the same.»

Sana smiles at her, leaning a bit closer. She smirks, a mischievous glint in her eyes. «And what do you want?»

Dahyun’s breath hitches. She swallows, thickly. «I— I don’t know yet.»

«You’ll figure it out, I know you will.» Sana grabs Dahyun’s hand, holding it tightly.

Dahyun tenses, but doesn’t have the strength or courage to pull away. «But what if I don’t?»

«You will.»

«How can you have so much faith?» Dahyun asks, there’s so much confusion in her voice that it makes Sana’s smile slowly drop. «We barely know each other.» Dahyun whispers.

«We’re talking about you, Dahyun.» Sana doesn’t let go, but her eyes drift down, not able to face Dahyun when she speaks. «I think you’re a lot more than you let on or let yourself be. And that’s why I— that’s why I want to get to know you better.»

Sana looks up, and Dahyun does reach out, cupping her cheek. Dahyun’s never been so scared before. Dahyun’s never had so much courage before. Sana’s skin is warm and it sends small electric shockwaves through Dahyun’s body; through her fingertips, along her arm and towards her heart. It makes Dahyun shiver, it makes her breath heavier, thicker.

«You’re quiet, but not shy, you’re kind, but not a pushover, you know a lot, but you’re not arrogant… You’re a lot of things that I admire. Maybe it’s selfish of me but I want a person like you in my life.» 

Dahyun wasn’t aware that Sana knew so much about her, or that this is what she thinks of her. Dahyun’s mind is a blank canvas. Everything fades, the nervousness, the bravery, the tightness in her chest, the dryness in — it all disappears.

The only thing left is a small light. It starts from her chest, crawling towards her fingertips and her toes. And it makes Dahyun’s skin prickle with excitement.

It’s hope, Dahyun tells herself.

«I want you in my life as well.» 

They play a drinking game. And Dahyun accepts a can of beer from Chaeyoung. It’s some dry and bitter European brand that makes Dahyun pull a face whenever she takes a sip.

The music is being blasted at this point. Dahyun’s head begins to throb again, she feels the bass, which she usually likes, but now it’s causing her head to ache.

She downs the can of beer and goes out onto the porch. There are people smoking, someone’s throwing up over the ledge. Dahyun looks away, then goes into the garden. 

Her head’s not spinning yet, but she’s not sober. She’s still here, which is enough, Dahyun knows she’ll make it home. She stays outside, watching the sky, looking for the first signs of snow.

Someone calls her name, and Dahyun goes back inside. The music’s softer, something slower is playing. Dahyun’s cheeks are red from the cold, her hands shaking, legs trembling. She fetches a glass of water, not caring that this isn’t her kitchen, and goes back to where all the people she knows are sitting.

She listens to them speak, sometimes she listens to the music playing in the background. Dahyun reckons it’s nice to be able to filter sound like this, she can choose what to hear and what not to hear. She begins to wonder why she’s still here. Dahyun asks herself if she’s having fun, if parties are worth going to.

But she doesn’t have enough time to reach an answer as suddenly they’re all chased out of the house. Most of them decide to go on to a bar downtown. Chaeyoung tags along with Mina and Momo and Jihyo. The rest are going home.

Tzuyu lives near Jeongyeon and Nayeon, so they walk home together. Sana and Dahyun don’t really live that close, but they’re both going in the same direction, so they go together, much to Dahyun’s fear.

«You like Saint-Saëns?» Sana asks while they’re walking. She’s not drunk, Dahyun doesn’t think Sana’s that much of a drinker. 

«He has nice cello pieces.» Dahyun replies, looking down at the ground. She fiddles with her hands, then ends up stuffing them in her pockets.

«So you fancy the cello, huh?» Sana bumps into Dahyun, playfully shoving her shoulder.

«It has a nice sound.» Dahyun explains, shrugging. «I feel like it’s trying to tell me something.»

Sana tilts her head, then smiles, and she makes this soft sound of excitement that makes Dahyun’s stomach flutter.

«And what about Salut d’Amour?» Sana teases, making a kissy face.

«Oh, that one.» Dahyun blushes. «Come on, it’s a very beautiful piece.» She whines.

«It’s a very romantic piece.» Sana quips, still smiling.

«It’s a love letter.»

«I feel you’d like Henry Purcell’s Rondeau. They used it for the Pride and Prejudice soundtrack, but they managed to make it very romantic.»

«I’ll listen to it.»

Sana suddenly bites her bottom lip, contemplating. Dahyun swallows thickly, then looks away.

«I could also send you other pieces, if you’d like?» Sana says, voice steady but small.

«Sure, that’d be great, thank you.» Dahyun nods, lips drawn in a thin line.

«You’re kind of a romantic, aren’t you?» Sana goes back to teasing Dahyun again, and Dahyun lets out a chuckle.

«I guess,» Dahyun shrugs, «but I’ve never had much luck with romance in life, though.»

«This is a small town, I can’t imagine you having any trouble if you ever get out of here.»

Dahyun blushes, and goes quiet. She looks away, not able to face Sana, not now. All her emotions, everything that she’s ever felt is written on her face.

They walk in silence for a while. The night is cold, and Sana shivers. She’s got a ridiculously thin jacket on. Dahyun’s isn’t necessarily any thicker but it’s long and covers her legs from the chill of the night.

She huffs, accidentally drawing Sana’s attention to her. Dahyun doesn’t exactly know why, but she takes off her coat and offers it to Sana, wanting to make a trade.

«We can switch back when we pass the convenience store.» Dahyun says, offering her coat.

Sana doesn’t reject the offer and carefully takes Dahyun’s coat.

«You know, Dahyun, you put music into words in a way that I never can.» She says after shrugging on the coat. Sana’s a fair bit taller than Dahyun, but somehow the coat still fits on Sana’s shoulders and manages to cover her legs.

«But you play music, you can play the cello, and I’ll… understand.» Dahyun says trying to sound poetic. But it probably sounds dumb, now that she’s said it out loud.

«You think I’m a good cellist?» Sana asks, and Dahyun sees how nervous she is. Dahyun doesn’t want to lie, but she doesn’t want to give Sana false flattery. But the things she wants to say makes her afraid. She considers what to say, until she just goes for it.

«I think you have potential to be a very good one, but you won’t ever reach that potential here. You won’t get the guidance you need in this town, it’s too small, and you won’t get it in the next one, or the one after that. You’ll go far in the capital, but even further abroad.» Dahyun says finally, no matter how much it hurts to tell Sana she should leave the town in order to achieve her goals.

«It’s smart to get away from here, you’ll do better out there.»

«Aim for the stars, isn’t that what they say?»

« And even if you miss you’ll land among them is the rest of the saying. Or something like that.»

«Fortune favours the bold.»

«Nothing ventured, nothing gained.»

They both laugh at that, continuing down the road. They pass the convenience store, and Sana tries to hand back Dahyun’s coat but Dahyun doesn’t accept it, saying she’s perfectly fine with Sana’s jacket (which smells like flowers and makes Dahyun’s heart flutter).

After a few minutes they reach an underpass where they have to go their separate ways. Sana stops and turns to Dahyun, a gentle smile on her face. Dahyun holds her breath, afraid.

«Thanks for walking with me.»

Dahyun nods, looking at Sana, captivated by her eyes. Dahyun doesn’t really understand it; how one can be so spellbound by a person. This feeling swirling deep inside Dahyun isn’t obsession, but it isn’t that forgiving either.

Sana looks at the ground, smiling, then she looks up at the sky.

«The moon looks lovely tonight, doesn’t it?» Sana whispers softly.

«Yeah.» Dahyun breathes. She holds out her hand and a snowflake lands in her palm, then melts away. «First snowfall as well.»

A/N:

you guys are the real MVPs for sticking around for so long! btw I thought I’d let you guys know I’m taking away the ‘completed’ mark as I see it’s not really fair to say it’s finished when I keep continuing it. no more confusion!

also, I completely understand you want more (haha, I also want more), and I really enjoy reading your comments, but I cannot stress how random this story is. idk where I’m going with this, there is no plot, and updates are sporadical. but I promise I’ll let you know when I stop updating, or when we’re nearing the end (we aren’t there yet as I actually plan on Dahyun either going to uni or doing military service, dunno yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

anyway, I appreciate every single one of you and hope you have an amazing day! thank you and stay safe! see you in the next update!

— Despereauxx

(I know nobody asked but some really epic film music I recommend are: the main theme from Mr Sunshine, and Gesture of Resistance from Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo. the entire Star Wars soundtrack is pretty badass, especially Rey’s theme! Violet Evergarden’s soundtrack is also pretty cool, especially the string quartet piece! haha there’s just so much good music out there!!! the pieces mentioned in this chapter are also very nice ♡ )