They were staying at Hyunjung’s summer vacation house. Well, technically it’s her parents’, but Sojung kept going on about how Hyunjung’s going to own everything anyway when she grows up. To be completely honest, it didn’t even look like a summer house, with how modern and luxurious it seemed, and it excites her three friend even more when she said that they’ll be staying there uninterrupted, aside from the guards hired by her parents sitting outside to look after them in case of emergency.

 

It was one of those nights where Jiyeon is restless, anxious for no reason, as she tosses and turns around quietly, trying not to wake Hyunjung who was sleeping so peacefully beside her. She tried distracting herself by tracing lines on Hyunjung’s back, but obviously that bothered the older girl, considering she flinched when Jiyeon’s fingers pressed on her a little too hard. 

 

Darkness was surrounding them, the occasional laughing and yelling from Soobin and Sojung’s room couldn’t be heard anymore, and silence started to engulf them. And Jiyeon hated it. She had been wary at first when Sojung suggested they go on a vacation together, considering she had found it hard for her to sleep in foreign places, places out of the comfort of her own apartment room. But Hyunjung was there, standing beside her, reassuring her that it’s going to be fine while Sojung planned out the activities they would be doing as if she was the one who owned the summer house. Hyunjung had told her on numerous occasions that whenever she’s in trouble, the older one would console her that she’d be there to help her to the most possible extent. 

 

“Hyunjung.” She whispered in the dark of night, uncertainty laced in her breath as she contemplated waking Hyunjung up just for a petty reason like this. Though Jiyeon pushed all those thoughts away, because she would love to believe Hyunjung cares for her that much. That she wouldn’t mind Jiyeon waking her up from her deep sleep at 3 a.m. in the morning, asking for reassurance  and soothing words before nightmares got to her. 

 

“Hey, please wake up.” Pulling her hands out from under the covers, she nudged Hyunjung’s back deliberately, that after a few seconds, she finally flinched,stretching her arms before facing Jiyeon. A sigh escaped her lips as her lids started to flutter heavily, that when she stared back into Jiyeon’s eyes, the girl could see the sleepiness and fatigue from early that evening still lingering around. 

 

“What is it?” Hyunjung  questioned as she blinked slowly, attempting to get rid of the tiredness that weighed her eyelids. For a moment, guilt crept up into Jiyeon’s heart, but she ignored it when she spoke after. 

 

“I’m sorry for bothering you, but I can’t seem to get any sleep.” 

 

That was how they found themselves walking outside in an ungodly hour. 

 

“Hyunjung, are you sure about this?” Her hands gripping Hyunjung’s tightened unknowingly, and a part of her was relieved when the older girl squeezed it back reassuringly. Her fingers slipped around Hyunjung’s perfectly like puzzle pieces that had been assembled completely, and Jiyeon truly loved how Hyunjung’s hands were occasionally a little bit bigger than her. The stones they were stepping on were uneven, and subtle noises could be heard from time to time. 

 

“It’s okay. I’m here with you. We’re not going to swim in the lake anyway.” They reached the edge of the lake, and Hyunjung halted to a stop at a small area where there were wooden chairs and a small coffee table, where they had their modest barbeque party earlier that evening. Hyunjung turned to her and raised an eyebrow.

 

“Or do you actually want to?” Jiyeon couldn’t depict what expression the older girl was wearing at the moment, a mix of playfulness but also genuineness as she stared at her through her lashes, and before Jiyeon could answer, she spoke again.

 

“But it’s too much work to go back and grab our swimsuits.” 

 

“I don’t--”

 

“Unless you want to go bare?” Then Hyunjung grinned at her, a sweet, mischievous grin, and Jiyeon absolutely thought she looked lovely, that was until she realized what Hyunjung just said. In no time, she slapped the older girl’s arm in disbelief.

 

“Hyunjung! You’re so inappropriate!” She half-whispered in disgust, cursing silently that a part of her brain was actually imagining the scenario in her head. Hyunjung’s laughter filled the air, breaking the stillness that surrounded them comfortably a few minutes ago.

 

“I’m just joking. Don’t be mad.” While her eyes were drifting towards the translucent lake in front of them, captivated by the moonlight reflected on the surface of it, she felt warmth enveloped her left hand, cold fingers caressing hers in a gentle manner. 

 

“I’m not.” As Jiyeon turned to look at the person who had been occupying her mind these past few months, she found Hyunjung’s eyes on her, bright and round and pulling her into the comfort she readily provided. The atmosphere was pleasant. Being around Hyunjung was pleasant. She felt her tugging on her hand, and when she raised her eyebrows, Hyunjung pulled her down with her, closely, leaving almost no space between them. She’s coaxing Jiyeon to fall into the soothing atmosphere they had created. The warmth of Hyunjung’s body around her, their shoulders pressed against each other in a shy manner, made Jiyeon think about how attractive she found Hyunjung to be. With her slightly messy bangs that she never bothered taking care of, her naturally red, plump lips and her very, Jiyeon might say, adorable, contagious smile despite her serious demeanor.
 

 

“Thank you for putting up with me.” She spewed out of nowhere, but it didn’t look like it caught Hyunjung off guard, probably considering that Jiyeon had always been that type of person. Always expressing her gratitude for the smallest things. 

 

There was worry laced in Hyunjung’s voice. It was faint, but it’s there. “It’s nothing.I’m glad I'm helping. At least I think I am.”

 

“You’re helping. A lot if I’m being honest.” It was comfortable, the silence that settled upon them after those words left Jiyeon’s lips freely. She slightly leaned her head to Hyunjung’s shoulder, and when the older girl didn’t seem to mind, she took it as a green sign. The comfortable position they were in dissipated the foreign, unsettling emotions that resided inside Jiyeon half an hour ago, and were replaced by a sense of relief as she let Hyunjung’s fingers play with her hair.  

 

“Hey.” Hyunjung’s restrained hum came from deep within , and Jiyeon had to resist from just pulling Hyunjung’s neck and inviting her into a sloppy, wet kiss that she yearned to do so much ever since she discovered these unnamed feelings she labored for the older girl.

 

“Maybe it’s just me being delusional, but I really like the fact that you always pay attention to what I want or don’t want.” Out of instinct, as if she’d done it a lot of times before (and maybe she did), Jiyeon ran her fingers along Hyunjung’s exposed thighs, liking how Hyunjung shivered not-so-subtly beside her. Physical affection was something she enjoyed a lot, and it only appeased her more when Hyunjung didn’t seem to mind her interest in craving for the older girl’s attention.

 

That’s interesting, for someone like Hyunjung-unnie. Or whatever Soobin meant by that, Jiyeon wasn’t sure.

 

Hyunjung purposely interlaced their fingers together, tighter than before and ever so slowly, she pulled Jiyeon along to stand with her. She urged her to stride casually towards the lake. “Really? I didn’t notice.”

 

“You do. Between Sojung, Soobin and you, you’re always the first to ask me if I’m okay with you guys' weird attempts at getting us all suspended or even expelled.” She heard a dramatic gasp beside her, to which she blatantly ignored and rolled her eyes as she carried on to the lakeside, leaving Hyunjung behind who stopped just now.

 

“That’s only two times! And you mean Sojung’s attempt.” Hyunjung retorted, and she was back beside Jiyeon again, surrounding her in that chaotic but at the same time calm energy that only she could carry. 

 

“Well, yes, and yours.” It was dark, with only the moonlight illuminating the whole area. When Jiyeon turned to look at the taller girl, her eyes were glowing, focusing themselves on Jiyeon like how they did in the bedroom a few moments ago, sparkling and attentive to every single word that left Jiyeon’s lips. Hyunjung pouted slightly, but Jiyeon was final with her words. 

 

“I said what I said, Hyunjung.” Said girl chuckled lowly. Her gaze was boring fiercely into Jiyeon’s eyes, as if trying to see through the walls she carefully built around Hyunjung, so as not to accidentally reveal her true feelings for the heir, afraid that all this time their relationship had been simply platonic. It was unforeseen when Hyunjung’s expression turned soft, a subtle grin forming on her lips.

 

“It’s because I care for you.” Jiyeon was prepared to hear another sly remark or a retaliation from Hyunjung, but what came out of was rather unexpected. Their eye contact was broken, but before Jiyeon could sigh in disappointment, Hyunjung pulled her closer by the hips, circling her arms around her firmly, and goodness, the smile that grew on the older's face almost made her heart burst right there and then.

 

“That’s cute.” She said, almost, almost stuttering in the process. She tried to sound unbothered by Hyunjung’s sentence, although it proved to be hard when Hyunjung’s body was too close for her to handle.

 

“Let me talk or I’ll push you right now.” 

 

Jiyeon laughed heartily, and for a moment, the only thing that mattered to her was to prevent herself from falling into the translucent water underneath her. To truly hold onto the lean arm wrapped securely around her waist, hoping that the moment they were having would last for eternity, wanting to cherish the moment for as long as it lasted. She hold Hyunjung’s gaze again, and at that exact moment, she became so aware of how fast the pace of her heart was going at. 

 

Hyunjung spoke then, distracting Jiyeon from the flowers that were blooming uncontrollably inside her chest. “I care for you, more than I care for Sojung and Soobin because you’re so stubborn and so bold sometimes.” Jiyeon must’ve looked at her wildly because she quickly continued, “And before you could say anything, it’s not a bad thing.”  

 

“It sounds bad.” She deadpanned while Hyunjung chuckled gently.

 

 “No no, listen.”

 

“For example, whenever someone tells you you can’t do it, you’re always so driven to prove them wrong. You did good too almost all the time. On top of that, you always know what you want. That’s very fascinating to me.” Hyunjung’s statement made it sound like Jiyeon was so amazing and special to her, and the way she was looking at Jiyeon so affectionately was making the younger girl’s thoughts drift everywhere.

 

“You sound like you’re in love with me.” They were standing ankle deep in the lake, and if possible, Jiyeon just wanted to pull herself into it the moment that particular sentence slipped before she could catch it. She dragged her gaze away from Hyunjung, looking elsewhere that suddenly the old trees seemed more interesting than the person that she had been in love with for the past consecutive months. 

 

It was silent for a few seconds, but to Jiyeon it felt like a whole minute, with her face burning with embarrassment and her arms wrapping around Hyunjung’s neck starting to let loose. At one point she thought that would those words change anything between them from then on? Or would Hyunjung just take it as another excessive joke from her? 

 

“If I actually am? What are you going to do about it?”

 

Hyunjung had whispered so quietly under her breath that Jiyeon almost missed it, but she didn’t. She felt her breath hitting her neck, sending shivers down her spine and when she turned, their noses almost touching each other.  It was as if Jiyeon had got herself into a trance. With how deep Hyunjung's orbs were onto her, her lips parted slightly, her body warm and how soft the material of her loose shirt in Jiyeon's fist, Jiyeon could feel the thrums of their heart beating under their skin. 

 

The tone of her voice was not one that indicated she was playing around, and that scared Jiyeon. The faint change in the look of her eyes, alluring and convincing as Jiyeon struggled to calm the nerves that ran through her veins. She spoke then, uncertainty bound between her trembled lips, daring herself to lock eyes with Hyunjung yet again. 

 

“I’ll tell you that I love you too.” 

 

Everything happened in a flash. Her breath was caught in , her eyes shut tight, her fingers shook as she grip Hyunjung's shirt tighter when she felt soft lips pressed against hers. She was gentle, capturing Jiyeon's lips full of intention, hoping Jiyeon understood the emotions she was trying to convey. And Jiyeon did, and she found herself pulling Hyunjung closer by the neck. 

 

"Jiyeon."

 

"Yes?"

 

"If by chance, we get married one day, would you really stay by my side until we get old together?" 

 

"Are you doubting me?" 

 

"I'm not." Hyunjung laughed, "I'm just asking." 

 

Jiyeon's smile was oddly similar to the sun that was setting in front of them.

 

"Well, if we get married one day, I will. I definitely will. But the question is, will you?" 

 

"Of course I will. Why would I leave you? You're such a perfect human being that I would look insane if I ever leave you." Hyunjung turned her head, averting her attention from the chocolate waffle she was devouring, and smiled goofily at the person next to her. But instead of getting a corny reply from the other, she got a slap on the arm, which almost made her drop her waffle. For a small person, Jiyeon surprisingly had enough strength to make her slaps stung. She was probably stronger than Hyunjung. One time Jiyeon accidentally punched her stomach, and God knows, she felt like dying. 

 

"You're so annoying, you know that?" When she was about to complain about how that slap hurted, warmth spread through her left arm. Jiyeon rubbed the spot she had just hit slowly, with a smile still on her face. 

 

"I'm telling you the truth." 

 

"I know, and I love you for that." She whispered, enough for Hyunjung to hear, while ripping a piece of her snack. They basked in the warm sunlight against their skin, Jiyeon leaning back onto the wooden bench they settled on,  sighing contently as she glanced at Hyunjung who was too focused on eating beside her. Even from the side, she could see the circle that formed around Hyunjung’s cheeks when a giant piece of the waffle was stuffed into . Jiyeon found it silly. How endearing Hyunjung was. How attractive she was to Jiyeon, even though she was clumsy, careless and everything that had a similar definition to those. But truthfully, that was what made Hyunjung. Those traits and an appealing personality were the things that made her fall in love with her in the first place. 

 

“I love you too.” 

 

"Promise me," Jiyeon grabbed Hyunjung's hand and intertwined their warm fingers gradually. It made Hyunjung turn to her completely. 

 

"That you'll stay with me."

 

Anxiousness ran through her veins. Despite the many times Hyunjung tells her she loves her, she's scared of the unsure future. The petrifying reality. There were always those lingering questions in her mind. The unwanted 'what ifs'.

 

A silly pinky promise sealed it all.

 

Jiyeon felt her pinky finger linking with Hyunjung's bigger one. 

 

"I promise, Jiyeon-ah. But you have to promise me the same thing too." 

 

"I promise.” 

 

Those particular sentences resonate in her ear, repeating it again and again, like a broken cassette, an echo, spiraling through her brain loudly, but at the same time, fades so quickly. 

 

She made a promise, amongst the many promises she had told the younger woman. 

 

And most of the time, to which she had just realized, she never really stayed true to her words. Even so, Jiyeon still accepts her, telling her that that's one of her beautiful flaws when one time she apologized to her for coming to their date an hour late.  

 

But this was different. This was a promise made to bind them together. A promise that, if broken, it would leave behind a painful scar. And it seems like her past self didn’t hesitate to break it off. Doesn't have a second thought that it will hurt her, Jiyeon and probably even Yeoreum, deeply. 

 

What more is needed to prove herself that she's bad for Jiyeon and Yeoreum.

 

Gradually, she relents to the fact that she still loves Jiyeon. She probably has always. Even if the younger woman was looking at her with despair and conflicted expression, for a second in their heated argument, she thought about how much her feelings had bloomed for her. It passes, and sometimes stays in her mind on how she still finds Jiyeon ethereal despite the tears running down her face so prominently.

 

But what's stopping her now? What's restraining her from fully allowing herself to be at ease whenever she's with Jiyeon? She finds it ridiculous how distant she has become with the younger woman now, as if they’re strangers again, talking to each other with a hint of awkwardness and wariness in the air every single time. How just a single accidental touch can make them recoil back to themselves, closing off the door’s to each other’s hearts unsympathetically. 

 

Staring at the laptop for hours makes her eyes hurt, despite turning down the brightness of the screen to as low as it could get. She glances at the analog clock hanging on the wall, sighing tiredly when she sees that it's already 6 p.m. No wonder her shoulders are starting to feel sore. 

 

Tilting her head upwards, Hyunjung starts to think about how almost everything in her life is just collectively going wrong. It had been really obvious from the start that becoming a heir to a particularly rich and successful company would already determine that her life would surely be ruined and that it is only a matter of time before she joins those corrupted corporate people that she despises  too much. That Jiyeon brutally hates. Wherever she's alone, it always leaves her with too many thoughts to think about. It has occured so many times that she doesn't bother giving a care about it now. But one thing Hyunjung knows is that those thoughts would, from time to time, always be accompanied by Jiyeon. 

 

Whether it's just for a fleeting moment, or a full hour of heart wrenching memories,  Hyunjung remains stuck in her own melancholy, without knowing if Jiyeon feels the same way as her or actually the opposite. It makes her laugh, that despite her being the one that had broken off their relationship with hurtful words and intent,  she herself gets hurt by her own actions.

 

From that day they signed the divorce contract, she's been feeling rather exasperated. Frustrated by the decision she had made, with her feelings all mixed and her judgement clouded. 

 

The sound of the doorbell ringing as she pushes open the cafe glass door delights her. It feels familiar, that it makes the usual cold surroundings of her office room feel foreign. 

 

Hands in her pocket, she walks up to the barista counter, where she sees a really familiar red hair who's leisurely cleaning the counter top. Hyunjung notices the obvious sign on the door that reads 'CLOSED', but that doesn't stop her from stepping in and goes to greet her best friend. 

 

Standing right in front of the counter, Hyunjung calls for the redhead to get her attention. 

 

"Sojung." 

 

The cafe owner seems to be busy, with her head under the counter, searching through the cabinet, probably counting the stocks of roasted coffee beans she has left.  In the background, Hyunjung can hear the faint sounds of Soobin washing dirty plates and ceramic mugs. 

 

She tries calling Sojung’s name again, yet the younger one doesn't seem to hear her, so she takes slow strides to near the woman, reaching behind the counter and getting a clearer view of what she’s doing. With earphones in her ears and her back facing Hyunjung, the older woman decides to nudge her.

 

She decides that that’s a bad idea to grab Sojung’s attention, because now she’s screaming like her life depends on it. And she hit her head on the countertop by getting startled from Hyunjung’s sudden approach. Soobin comes running in a panic state a few seconds later, only to be disappointed with a familiar and not anything unusual, seeing that Hyunjung’s laughing at Sojung who’s laying on the ground, clutching her head painfully.

 

"So, what brings you here?" The cafe owner asks as she sits down opposite of the CEO and serves her her favourite Ice Americano. The ice pack Soobin had given her is pressed harder onto the top of her head, hoping to ease the pain that’s starting to grow firmly. 

 

“Sorry for that.” 

 

“It’s fine, I’m used to it.”

 

Under the yellow light bulb, Sojung observes every little detail on the older woman's face. Despite being covered by light makeup, the dark circles under her eyes are evident, her cheekbones are starting to rise from not eating proper meals, her lips dry from sitting too long in the air conditioned room, her tiredness visible for only Sojung to see. It makes Sojung realize, no matter how highly she looks up to the perfect, amazing businesswoman Hyunjung, she sees how hard it was for her to get to where she is now. She knows how many people she has let down while she climbs to the top and remains there up until now. She's aware of how much she had sacrificed her time and youth just to be so successful. 

 

Kim Hyunjung doesn't give much care as to what happens in the outside world. It's like her only purpose in life is to become rich and successful. And she already is, right even before she starts working, she was born with a silver spoon in . But because of the way her parents raised her, wealth is the only thing that comes to her mind when someone asks what can make someone’s heart fill with delight and leaves them feeling ecstatic.

 

Even so, behind her cold façade is actually a warm-hearted, kind and caring soul. She knows Hyunjung takes notice of everything. Especially when it comes to her relationship with people. 

 

And she figured it out. 

 

From Hyunjung's fiddly fingers, her awkward sitting posture, her wandering eyes, she comes here with an intent to say something to her. Well, that's at least what she thought, she can never read what her best friend is thinking. 

 

So Sojung tries. Tries to help Hyunjung to form words that can make both of them understand what she's trying to tell her. 

 

"Nevermind. Actually, how have you been holding up?" 

 

"I'm doing fine." 

 

"How's work?" 

 

"Going well. How about you?" 

 

"A few days ago, our old coffee machine broke, so Soobin and I just bought a new one yesterday." She smiles proudly, pointing at the newly bought, shiny coffee machine on the counter top. 

 

"I see." There is a small grin etched on Hyunjung's lips, before she sips on her drink, despite the cold atmosphere during the night. Come to think of it, Hyunjung is only wearing her formal shirt, her suit jacket and tie out of sight, assuming that she has just finished work.

 

"How's Yeoreum?" 

 

"Yeoreum? She's fine. She's still very cheerful and energetic. I don’t know where she gets all that energy from." Sojung is about to say something that will surely be out of the conversation, but she opts to stay on the topic, at least for these few seconds before her insensitive self gets to her. 

 

"I heard she won the kindergarten's coloring contest a few weeks ago." 

 

At that, Hyunjung chuckles. "Yeah, yeah she did. For a six years-old, she actually colors pretty neatly. I have a drawing she made that I hung up in my office." And Sojungs sees then, the way Hyunjung brightens up at the topic they're talking about now. Just how much space she has for only Yeoreum to fill it in. But regardless of that, there is still the remaining nervousness hidden under the older woman's skin.

 

Sojung juggles the thought of bringing her friend's name up. Assuming that her guess is right, she shoots Hyunjung a name that the older woman would preferably avoid to hear let alone talk about, especially if it's Sojung’s the one speaking on her. 

 

"Jiyeon?" 

 

Hyunjung slightly freezes upon hearing the name that just left Sojung's mouth. Which Sojung finds funny actually. Even after a year, Hyunjung is still so awkward when talking about something regarding her ex-wife, who she seems to forget that before being her wife, Jiyeon was her lover and her best friend, the person she goes to whenever the burden of being a heir is too much for her, the hardship of balancing her social life and her insignificantly different life gets a little too hard to handle. 

 

"W-what?" And she stutters!

 

"Jiyeon." Nevertheless, Sojung continues casually. "How is Jiyeon doing?" 

 

"How is Jiyeon doing?" Hyunjung's slender fingers start plucking on the second button of her white cotton shirt.

 

"Why are you asking me?" Folding her legs, Sojung leans back consciously onto the soft brown single couch that she rarely sits on. 

 

"No, I mean--" She exhales tiredly, rubbing her forehead with her thumbs, drawing circles on it. Sojung almost chuckles out of amusement, if not for the fact that the both of them are exhausted. 

 

"Jiyeon is doing fine." She says passively. 

 

"Fine?" Sojung urges.

 

Hyunjung raises her eyebrows then."Splendid?"

 

"You know that's not what I meant."

 

"Then? What do you mean? What do you want me to say about her?" The subtle rise in Hyunjung's tells her to slow down with the question, but Sojung knows better, so she keeps on going.

 

"How are you and her?" Hyunjung is staring at her with an indescribable expression that Sojung almost, almost , regrets asking the question. But then she sighs, a deep, tired sigh as she leans back on the leather couch, the almost finished cup of coffee in her hands. 

 

In a small voice, she speaks. "How are we? I don't really know, Sojung." 

 

At that moment, Hyunjung’s guard is let down, and the movement of her lips are small, as she shuts her eyes languidly. “I really don’t know. It seems that we’re fine. It seems that we’re okay with how we’re living right now, but next thing we know--” 

 

“Next thing you know,” 

 

“--next thing I know, I’m thinking of being with her again. God, it feels so wrong, Sojung. I really shouldn’t be feeling this way at all.” 

 

“Yeah well, you tell me.” The barista blurts out bluntly, and she pretends to be scared when Hyunjung glares at her. Yet Hyunjung doesn’t seem like she’s truly bothered by what she said. 

 

“I mean, I’m not judging or anything, but you practically broke her heart.”

 

“You don’t have to tell me, I know that already.” The older woman hisses uncomfortably. 

 

“No, you need to truly realize that you broke her, Hyunjung.”

 

“I told you, I know, Sojung.” 

 

“You made her cry her heart out because of you.” The subtle tone change in Sojung’s voice is noticed by the both of them, and yet Hyunjung doesn’t say anything about it. Something about this topic is riling the younger one up and the way Hyunjung's reacting to every one of her questions isn't helping to calm her at all.  “You forced her to lie to Yeoreum because she doesn't want Yeoreum to wonder why you guys broke up, doesn't want Yeoreum to be sad. She has nightmares and breakdowns because of you--”

 

“I know! You don’t have to ing slap those words on my face directly!” Without herself realizing, Hyunjung’s standing upright, frown visible on her face,voice cutting off Sojung’s accusing words. Hyunjung looks down on her, the veins on her forehead not hiding the fact that she’s annoyed by where this topic is going, and Sojung, without really wanting to admit it, feels satisfied that she’s managed to piss the older woman off. But then to her surprise, Hyunjung exhales deeply, sitting back down and slumps on the couch.

 

“I know, Sojung. We’ve had this conversation so many times before, I’m getting tired of it, and I know you are too.” She utters quietly, as if she’s whispering. 

 

“I know how hurt she is because of my doings, my actions, my decisions. I saw it, okay? She’s self-conscious of being around me, being with me. At least I think she is. She’s not really subtle about it.  I’m stupid I know. To be letting go of someone like her, someone who cares so much about me. And I miss her so much, Sojung.” 

 

"I really do miss her. I hate myself so much." Sojung hears, the frustration in Hyunjung’s voice is clear enough to show that she absolutely hates harboring these kinds of feelings for Jiyeon. Sojung sympathizes, despite sounding like she was ready to fight Hyunjung a few moments ago, it’s a relief to her and probably to Hyunjung that she manages to quickly pull herself together. 

 

"It's fine, it's normal to feel that way." She attempts to sound soothing, to invite Hyunjung into the comfort that’s always been offered to her silently. Sojung may not show it, but she cares for Hyunjung almost as much as she cares for her dear girlfriend, Soobin. It’s just that Hyunjung may or may not be aware of it. 

 

"Suddenly you're fine with this?" 

 

"I'm sorry for making you feel guilty. It's just," And Sojung doesn't know what to say. She had let her emotions get the best of her, when she's supposed to be neutral in this situation. When she’s obligated to not side with any of them because both of them are equally special to her. When Hyunjung and Jiyeon depend on her to be the middle person, to avoid their relationship from becoming worse with each other. 

 

"It's fine, I ruined my own relationship, I think I deserved that." 

 

“Hey, I’m sorry for being so harsh on you all of a sudden, I don't know what’s gotten into me. It’s fine, take your time.” Another heavy sigh escapes Hyunjung’s lips. From the corner of her eyes she notices Soobin sweeping the floor while humming to a tune, ignoring the tension that hung in the air a few seconds ago. She makes a mental note to annoy her later for leaving her to struggle alone listening to Hyunjung’s not-so-favorable confession.

 

“God, I just feel so pathetic. I love her, Sojung. I still do.”

 

While she knows Hyunjung still loves Jiyeon,  she is against the idea of them getting back together. Even as both of their best friends, Sojung is pretty much aware she doesn’t have a say in whatever mess the two are juggling themselves in. Despite meeting Jiyeon through Hyunjung, and Jiyeon joining their group of friends a little bit later in their last few years in university, she still cares for the woman as much as she cares for Hyunjung, because they were once the bestest of friends, who were never separated, along with the loud and cheery Park Soobin.

 

Now Hyunjung may be weak, but Jiyeon is fragile. Her tough, strong-willed image is just a façade to hide the fact that despite her teasing about Hyunjung being an emotional mess, she herself is one too. The image of Jiyeon knocking on her apartment door a few hours after she had a fight with Hyunjung, with tears in her eyes and  her body shaking from the cold rain would appear in her mind from time to time whenever she took a glance at Hyunjung. She remembers how dreary that night was, with her comforting Jiyeon in her arms, and Soobin beside them ringing up Hyunjung nonstop, trying to talk some sense into the older woman. 

 

But Hyunjung never picked up. 

 

It was heartbreaking to watch just how much Jiyeon loves Hyunjung. It was painful for both Sojung and Soobin to watch their relationship unfold, how unbothered and uncaring Hyunjung was towards Jiyeon’s feelings at that moment. And Sojung was so mad. Mad that she had been the only one beside Jiyeon to trust Hyunjung the most, and yet the older woman had betrayed her, betrayed Jiyeon. 

 

“I know.” And Jiyeon loves Hyunjung. Sojung could never understand how she still does, and maybe she now understands what the saying ‘love does things to people’ refers to. But then again, that’s probably just how Jiyeon is as a person. Too considerate and too forgiving that here she is for the second time, becoming attached to Hyunjung yet again. It scares Sojung, how relationships and love work. Well sure, she has had her fair share of bickering with Soobin regarding trivial things, whether it’s about not wiping the countertop, or forgetting to do the laundry, or even just Sojung’s passion for annoying Soobin getting a little too out of hand, but it really is never that serious. Sojung makes sure that it would never go that far.

 

“But it’s just going to stay that way forever, don’t you think?”

 

"Right. You're right. There's no way I'm letting her go through that again."