Chapter 1: Congratulations on the random feature! one critic, you should've used Name, "..." instead of Name: ...
it lessen the feeling you can have by reading it. You could've describe the feel better such as 'Where the hell is that stupid guy?, Yoona thought' or 'oh... he died... MWO?! He died? But... But.... Omo... No way... Yoona said multiple times in her mind'. But after all, it was great!
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