Why? I don’t know. It seems fun, I think. Or I was just bored, I think. It’s because they don’t let me take care of anything in the farm. I don’t know why they won’t let me...

It’s fun, yes I have to say it’s been fun. I love it here. At least it’s something different than from what I always see back home.

To be honest, it’s been so long since the last time I feel this… this kind of anticipation. I just want to enter the arena. And end everything with a quick bang. Yes. That doesn’t sound all that bad, does it?

_ _ _ _ _
 

“Eat.”

The little girl was quivering under her intimidating gaze, her body furled in a defensive position and head hung low, afraid that everything will just go from bad to worse if she ever caught the sight of her sister’s eyes.

“What’s wrong Hana? That’s your lunch. Eat!”

Haneul’s tone went from almost sounding as if she was concerned, to mocking, to dripping with venom with little to no warning. And it only terrify Hana all the more so. Which was a good thing. Her unpredictability means that Hana will never know if in the next second she would be served a faux kindness or feel her back hitting the dirty floor.

The best tactic in playing people around her like a fiddle.

“Don’t you want to eat it?”

When she didn’t hear any response back from her little victim of the day, Haneul swooped in for her final attack and reveled in the rush of satisfaction when she saw Hana cowering away in fear.

She was too easy it was almost boring.

“You… you know I can’t.” Of course she can’t. She couldn’t even look at the steaming bowl of beef stew without flinching. What a disgrace.

“Well then, can I have it?”

Haneul didn’t wait to see the confirmation coming from her little sister, swooping off the bowl from the table and confidently walked away from her sister’s table to the one adjacent of it. Where her ‘ducklings’ were waiting, their tails wagging and eyes wide with genuine sense of aspiration when Haneul plopped down on the bench without much care.

“Well, that’s how you can get yourself second servings for free.”

From the corners of her eyes, Haneul saw her sister walking back to her classroom with empty stomach. She gingerly tried to avoid the scattered pieces of steamed vegetables, inedible as they’ve spent the last few minutes basking in the dust covered floor.

But she was too busy absorbing the admiration of her ducklings to care all that much. ‘It’s her own fault for being a vegetarian in a freakin meat producing district.’

“Is it true?” She heard Yeojin’s mousy voice from the other end of the long table. Haneul sometimes contemplated on kicking her out of her group just because she resembled Hana too much, but her blind obedience over whatever order that came out of Haneul’s mouth always stopped her from doing so. “You’re going to volunteer for the game?”

“That’ll be so cool,” right beside her, the gangly Hansol chirped, “we’ve never had a volunteer for as long as I remembered.”

“Yes.” Her answer came without any hesitation. And she lives for all the ‘ooh’s and ‘aah’s of her ducklings after they heard her confirmation. It even caused her to genuinely smiled. The first for that day. So it surely did mean a lot to her.

“Aren’t you afraid?” Yeojin once again asked after the commotion died down.

That. That constant tinge of fear in her voice was the reason for why it seemed to grate her ears so much. At 15, Yeojin only had 3 ballots of her name entered to the pool, while Haneul had almost three times the amount even when she was a year younger than her.

She has no spot for cowards in her group. Maybe she will kick her out. Later, though. Yeojin promised that she’ll let her try some of her silver jewelries after school.

“No, of course not. I know I’m going to win.”
 

_ _ _ _ _

 

Yoonjae never intended to surprise people by his appearance, but it was the fifth time in a row that the owner of a house visibly jumped in shock when they opened their door and saw him standing there. Quietly. With a weirdly placed smile on his face.

“Good morning Mrs. Park.”

Even his voice sounded weird. As if it was the first time that his lips were ever being stretched upward instead of put in their neutral position.

“Good… good morning Yoonjae, how can I help you?” She seemed to be in a hurry, as before she pulled her bathrobe together to shield her from the chilly morning wind, Yoonjae caught a glimpse of her tie-less official uniform. White, crisply ironed. Very fancy.

“Our youngest cattle has just given birth, so we’re celebrating it by… giving out free eggs.” Without pausing and waiting for the lady to process his words, Yoonjae ed the small basket of eggs to her hands, only betting on pure luck that she managed to catch it and not let the precious fresh product splatter all over her doorsteps.

“T… thankyou…”

She looked up from the tiny bump in her day and saw little Yoonjae had dashed off from her lawn and were heading to the next house in the government officials lodging area.

“Who is it mom?” Mrs. Park youngest daughter paused from eating her wheat pancakes and just absentmindedly ask her the mandatory question for situations such as this one. She completely missed the look of pure confusion on her mother’s face as she noticed the scribblings on the surface Yoonjae’s gifts.

‘Vote. Me. Please’

And underneath, written very small and within brackets,

(I want to die)

Mrs. Park looked at her daughter, 12 years old this year, and the tiny seed of fear for the government that she’d try so hard to kill began to sprout.

The elders had decided to still do a randomised choice, pulling names after names from a hat until one came out that will make it seem as if the choice was not made in courtesy of chance.

‘To keep it fair,’ the mayor said. But Mrs. Park knew he did so because he could not live with the guilt of deliberately choosing a child to go and fight for sole entertainment purposes. Nobody could.

But now she looked at this gift given to her by the sole surviving member of the Vanels and she wondered whether the mayor’s decision would be swayed.

He does love his eggs fresh after all.