Hello, J

It was your brother's birthday. You told me I should go and meet your family. It was really awkward because I was never good with introductions and meeting new people. I was a bit hesitant because I don't know how to act around strangers. I also don't know what I should do when I meet your family. You said everyone will be there including your child. I didn't know what to do. It was nerve-wracking. You got older brothers and I didn't know what should I call them. I was just really excited to meet your child, our child. I got through the first meeting. I had fun being with your child. Your mom was asking me if I can do something about the setup. That was the time when it hit me. You constantly go home to your child's father every rest day that you have. I don't know how to react. Seriously, by now you should know that. I don't know but this is the second time I felt I should run. The thought of you being with him every week pains me. Am I being stupid? Maybe I am. I love you and your child why can't I just have you both? That's what I asked myself. I never really talk about anything I discover and I have a habit of keeping it all to myself. How can I leave you, Krys? How can I leave when I love you so much that it hurts me knowing I will never be that person you need?

Yours always and forever,

A