LOG 20
The Classified Accounts of Ami HwangA/N: I've updated a few times these past few days so go back at least 2-3 chapters!!
“Alright, I’m here to save the day,” Annabelle announces as she barges into my room, carrying 4 boxes of pizza in her arms. “Dig in, everyone. Wait, you didn’t start the movie without me, right?”
“It’s just the opening sequence,” I shrug, grabbing a piece of cheese pizza from her. “Oh my god, this is divine. I haven’t had pizza in ages.”
“Have some Coke, Anna,” Lina says, passing her a red Solo cup.
Annabelle wrinkles her nose. “Coke? How juvenile.”
“You’re so pretentious,” Preet snorts. “Shut up and drink your soda.”
“Yes, dad,” Annabelle mocks, making a face at Preet.
“Alright, you guys!” I announce. “It’s starting!”
“I’ve already watched Legally Blonde,” Preet grumbles. “Mariana- my girlfriend- forced me to watch it about a million times.”
“You don’t like Legally Blonde?!”
“I liked it the first 5 times! And then we kept watching it over and over and over and I pretty much know the entire script-,”
“Shut up, Preet,” Annabelle snaps, her eyes glued to the TV. “I can’t hear what Reese Witherspoon is saying.”
“She’s talking about her boyfriend to her sorority sisters- which I know, because I’ve watched this a trillion times!”
Lina bursts into laughter, and soon, I follow suit. Annabelle snickers as Preet rolls his eyes good-naturedly and flings a pillow at her.
“You guys are crazy,” he mutters. “Wharton didn’t have idiots like you three.”
“Neither did Columbia,” I pipe up. “If you want to break out the Ivy League names, be my guest.”
Annabelle flips her hair. “If we want to break out the important names, Ralph Lauren, Giorgio Armani, Kate Moss, Adriana Lima-,”
“Well, I don’t mean to brag, but I was stuck here for 4 years and got to watch nearly every single member of X.E. and the Seven Stars have a nervous breakdown at some point,” Lina butts in, and the four of us smirk.
“Look at us,” Anna exhales, flinging her arms around me and Preet. “When I was 16, I never would’ve dreamed I was going to end up like this.”
“You were an angel when you were 16,” Lina says. “I didn’t know you would turn into a stuck-up fashion .”
“A stuck-up fashion that you love,” Annabelle says, making kissy faces at Lina, who launches a pillow at her face.
“Hey, I didn’t know Preet was going to end up hot.” Lina throws Preet an exaggerated wink. “You can hit me up at any time.”
“Oh, please,” Preet scoffs. “I’ve always been hot.”
“Really? Because I have yearbook pictures from the 9th grade that say otherwise-,”
“Okay, okay, fine.” He crosses his arms. “I think that- and I can’t believe I’m saying this- Ami is the most mature out of all of us.”
“Nice,” I chuckle as Lina and Annabelle nod in agreement.
“Second, I miss the old, innocent Anna, who tried to get us to shower once a week in order to stop global warming-,”
“I was a stupid kid, okay?” Annabelle mutters.
“-but I think she’s a lot more badass now.” He grins, and Annabelle grudgingly gives him a smile.
“And finally.” Preet turns to Lina, and we all lean forward in anticipation. “I am so happy Lina lost her tendencies of putting together ridiculous, maniacal plans. Actually, that goes for Ami and Lina, but mostly Lina.”
“Wha- my plans weren’t ridiculous or maniacal!” Lina protests.
I shake my head. “You . You were the one who had the brilliant idea of asking me to join the Anime Club so I could hack into the 4 Flames website.”
She flushes. “Okay, I’m really sorry about that. But that was the only stupid idea I had!”
Annabelle, Preet, and I exchange a look- and then all start giggling when we see the crestfallen look on Lina’s face.
“We’re kidding, calm down!” Anna exclaims, squeezing Lina in a tight hug. “We love you, Lina. I missed you so much in Paris.”
“Same,” Preet and I echo, and Lina laughs.
“Can you believe we’re all together again?” she says, affectionately looking around at us. “We’re the originals. We started together, and we’re ending together.”
Preet smiles sadly. “I wonder what Marcus would say if he saw us.”
The four of us are quiet for a moment.
And then Anna says, “He would be proud of us. Really, really proud.”
“He would hug us all and tell us that we’re amazing and we’re the best,” I continue. “And he would say sorry again, just because.”
“And then he go and make some of his hot chocolate.” Preet buries his face in his hands. “His stupid, perfect hot chocolate, with the marshmallows and the cinnamon, and he would give me a tin of sugar because he knew I’ve liked my hot chocolate extra sweet since I was 12.”
Lina sniffs. Tears are rolling down her cheeks.
“I promised myself I wouldn’t cry tonight,” she whispers.
“Too late,” Preet says, rubbing his eyes.
“All of this was for him,” I murmur in a thick voice. “The four of us worked to infiltrate Yohan, partner with X.E. and the Seven Stars, put ourselves through hell so that we could discover why his brother died. And now the 4 Flames is dead and he isn’t even here to see it.”
“I- I’m sure he knows,” Annabelle whispers, her shoulders shaking. “Marcus has been watching us this whole time. He’s proud of us.”
“Oh, god,” I moan, and dissolve into sobs.
Preet, Lina, and Annabelle come to comfort me, and we sit huddled up next to each other, forming a wall, a protective barrier.
For years, the four of us have suppressed the torture we have been through, the full extent of the horror we have experienced.
And we finally let it all out.
Memories flash through my mind. The night Lina, Preet, Annabelle, Marcus, and I boarded that bus, our bodies quivering with fear, after we plotted how to get rid of Preet’s laptop. The day Jungkook, Namjoon, Hoseok, Taehyung, Yoongi, Jimin, and Jin confronted me in the girls’ bathroom, guns at my head, as Preet and Annabelle blew up the chemistry storage room.
The time when Jungkook barged in on my interrogation with the police, Mrs. Wringer, and Principal Stucker to announce that I was his girlfriend. When he swore in his car that he wouldn’t kill me, and I could trust him. My first time meeting Marge on Floor 21. The day when Emma Stucker confronted me about not putting out to Jungkook, and I laughed so, so hard about how ridiculous my life had become.
The meetings at Lina’s house, where Marcus, Annabelle, Lina, Preet, and I would plan out our next moves at Yohan with the air of clever, sneaky detectives who were capable of outsmarting everyone. The night Jungkook staggered onto Floor 21, death in his eyes, and I tucked him in bed. When I erased my first family. When the Anime Club and I ran for our lives from 4 Flames agents after we revealed too much to Jaemi Kim. Floundering around during Training with Chanyeol as Jungkook snickered at me.
The anger Jungkook felt as I watched BTS’ first mission. The horror I felt when Chanyeol showed me Jungkook’s true nature. Watching Yohan scientists carve up human bodies to sell their organs. The day Hoseok and Namjoon dragged me to Floor 21 from school just so I could rest. Jungkook explaining everything to me in the coat closet at the Winter Ball. His kiss at the clearing, on that chilly December night.
His furious, anguished expression when he discovered that I was lying to him the entire time.
And then my mind trails off to the aftermath.
The night Kyungsoo and Joshua found me leaning over the roof of our apartment building, one moment away from jumping; the criss-crossed scars etched into my wrists, thin and straight and white; the days I stayed locked up in my room, too tired to eat, too tired to sleep, too weary to do anything but stare blankly at the wall in front of me. The days I would scream at Joshua and Kyungsoo that I didn’t want them, I wanted Jungkook, I wanted Marcus, I wanted Lina or Preet or Anna but not them, anyone but them! The 2 years I spent at university silently going through classes, too afraid to speak to anyone else, too afraid to make friends, too afraid to look at anyone.
And now I look around the room at the Anime Club. The people who I started with, the people who I will end with.
“Preet, Lina, Annabelle...,” I swallow. “I love you. Stay strong.”
A/N: omg this story is almost over :( lol i have an art history test tomorrow and i haven't studied at all wtf am i doing
low-key wanna get featured sldkfadsjfk
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