Title: Doctor, Doctor!
Length: 3245w.
Author's Note/s: gay, fluff, rainbow sprinkles, glitter, and curly fries. this is my attempt at crack so idk how it'll turn out hahaha. enjoy!

 

 

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“Oh, it’s you!” Seokjin exclaims. He swears he saw this guy walk in just last week. “Didn’t think I’d see you so soon. What seems to be the problem this time?” He just looks at the guy sitting on the bed, waiting for an answer. He didn’t have a chart or records of the patient to look at since this guy went to the clinic instead of the emergency room in the hospital. He wouldn’t have anything too bad, right?

 

 

 

“Oh, well, um…” the patient starts, fidgeting with his fingers. “I-I, uh… I actually can’t, um… breathe…” he lifts his head and looks at Seokjin. “…properly. Oh yes that’s it! Yeah, I can’t breathe properly.”

 

 

Seokjin eyes the man warily, but continues with the examination. “Well, when did that start?” he asks, disregarding the fact that it looked like the man forgot what he was in there for and reassured himself a while ago. It was a bit disturbing, bit Seokjin could handle it.

 

 

“About last week, actually…”

 

 

“But weren’t you here last week?” The patient freezes for a second but nods in response. “Why didn’t you tell me then?”

 

 

“I, uh…” the man nervously and quite visibly gulps. “Um… because it happened after I went here?”

 

 

Oh. “Well, okay then. What kind of difficulty is it? Do you hear wheezing when you breathe in deeply or do you have shortness of breath…?”

 

 

“Shortness of breath, yeah, that’s it.” Seokjin notices the patient getting more responsive. Or getting faster at responding, at least. This is good, he thinks. We might be able to get something out of this.

 

 

“Okay.” He stands up. “Can you please face this way? I’m going to have to examine your breathing. I’ll be quick.” He walks over to the bed his patient was sitting on. “Straighten your back, please.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Ugh, you’re so stupid,” Namjoon says to himself as he walks out of the clinic. After hearing Seokjin tell him that he did seem like he had difficulty breathing, with the shallow breaths he was taking, he was prescribed medicine for it and was told to rest more. When Seokjin told him to visit the clinic again the following week if he still had difficulty breathing, his eyes widened and he zoomed out of the clinic, almost forgetting to thank the doctor and the receptionist.

 

 

The truth was, his difficulty in breathing was caused by the very man he went to to have it checked out: Kim Seokjin. He was walking around one night, looking for things that could inspire him to make his music for him to be able to get back to redoing his mixtape, when he spots the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. The doctor walks out of the clinic, accompanying an old woman to a taxi they flagged down. He closes the door for her and when he smiled, oh man that smile, the air was knocked out of Namjoon’s lungs. His heart raced, his palms were sweaty, and oh my god is this love at first sight? he thinks as he takes a step back to create more distance between him and the stunning doctor.

 

 

 

 

Unfortunately, Kim Namjoon was known as sort of a god among his friends.

The god of awkwardness, clumsiness, and bad luck.

 

 

 

 

One event that could prove that assumption true was when he took that one step back, his heel got caught on the small crack on the pavement and he began to see everything in slow motion.

 

 

 

He doesn’t know when he started to scream or make any sort of noise, but he sees the doctor turning to look at him. His heart stops when their eyes meet and his arms stop flailing. He’s so beautiful and I think I’m falling in love were the only things to enter his mind at that moment. He starts to get lost in the others’ eyes when, all of a sudden, he falls on his and his 5 seconds on cloud nine was over. I guess on my rump, then. He winces at the impact but looks up just in time to see the doctor walking hurriedly towards him.

 

 

 

 

Suddenly feeling nervous about meeting the newfound love-of-his-life, Namjoon quickly shuffles to his feet, ignoring the pain on his backside, and scurries off into the night, the drumming of his pulse in his ears effectively blocking out whatever concerned shouts the doctor was throwing at him. He turns the corner and makes his way back to his apartment in a record-breaking 15 minute sprint.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I don’t think he saw me, though,” Namjoon tries to explain to his friend over the phone. “When I went back there the first time to have my, uh…” he clears his throat, “back checked out,” he mentally self-fives himself for remembering, “he didn’t say anything.”

 

 

Namjoon could hear his friend hitting something on the other line. Something like skin. Maybe it was a face. Maybe it was his face. Oh god. “Namjoooon,” his friend lets out a frustrated whine. “Would you have said something if you were him? Like, “Oh hi. Weren’t you the person I saw who fell over on the pavement like a few nights ago, falling on your rear end and running away like a little girl when all I wanted to do was help you?” Or something like that?”

 

 

Namjoon sighs. “I know. You’re right.” He brings a hand up and combs it through his hair. “But what do I do?”

 

 

“Um, I don’t think I’m the one you should talk to about thi— Yah!! What are you—“ he hears shuffling on the other line. “Hello, hyung?”

 

 

“Jimin! Of course,” Namjoon beams. “You can help me, right?”

 

 

Jimin chuckles. “Of course I can, hyung. Some of us here aren’t useless at giving advice (Hey!) when it comes to things like this.” Namjoon imagines Jimin struggling with his boyfriend because of what he just said. He laughs. “So, what seems to be the problem?”

 

 

Namjoon explains everything again to Jimin, while the latter patiently and understandingly listened, responding whenever he knew Namjoon needed a cue to continue his story. After having relayed the events that transpired to Jimin, Namjoon was starting to believe how stupid he was for running away. He thinks about retracting that mental self-five when Jimin speaks up.

 

 

“Wait, why’d you go back there anyway? If I were the receptionist, I wouldn’t buy that lame excuse of a backache.” Jimin cracks up on the other line.

 

 

“Ha ha. Thanks for that.” If only Jimin could see Namjoon’s face now. “Anyway, I wanted to see him again. I just didn’t know how. So I figured that if I go back to the clinic, I’d be able to see him again. Then again, the clinic had different schedules for the doctors so I had to check who was on duty that night and well…” he mumbles.

 

 

 

 

“You basically stalked him?!”

 

 

“You heard that?!”

 

 

“You can’t actually whisper, you know, hyung.”

 

 

Namjoon rolls his eyes and sighs again. This was getting hopeless. “So what do you think I should do now? Since you’re so good at this.”

 

 

 

“Well, since you only told us about this now, after you’ve gone for the second time already, some damage has already been done, I think.” Namjoon deflates. “But, luckily for you, it can still be fixed!” And Namjoon comes back to life. “All you have to do is…”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Once Jimin finishes giving instructions to Namjoon, which Namjoon didn’t take careful, handwritten notes of in his precious song-making notebook that he lets absolutely no one see, Namjoon picks up the notebook and looks at the rules. “So… this is it, huh?”

 

“Yep.”

 

“And you’re sure that if I do these,” he shakes the notebook he’s holding up, “it’ll get him to like me, too?”

 

“Yep.”

 

“I hope I’m not being an idiot for believing you.” He squints his eyes, wanting Jimin to telepathically feel whatever threat he was trying to pass off. “You better know what you’re talking about, Park Jimin.”

 

Jimin gasps. “How dare you belittle my knowledge? I’ll have you know that…” Jimin ends up snickering. “Yeah, you’ll be fine, hyung. Just stick to my instructions and he’s sure to fall for you, too. Hopefully not on his , unlike you.”

 

Namjoon shakes his head but smiles nevertheless. “Okay, thanks. Tell Yoongi I said thanks, too!”

 

“We say you’re welcome! Go get ‘im, hyung!” and Jimin hangs up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A week passed by and here he was, in the clinic once again, ready to confess his everlasting, undying love for the doctor. He had a week to think about his strategy, using the instructions Jimin gave him. He gathered all the courage he could in the past week, practicing in front of the mirror what he wanted to say to the doctor. He may or may not have used shades to distort his vision because he could not confess to himself, but he was ready. When he hears his number getting called, he stands up and walks coolly to the receptionist. Completely forgetting about the untied shoelaces on his left shoe, he almost trips but catches himself just in time, causing the receptionist to eye him suspiciously. So much for being smooth. She tells him that the doctor is ready for him now and he thanks her before walking in.

 

He enters the room and sees the doctor on his seat, back him. Perfect! He inhales deeply, ready to greet the doctor with more heart and energy than he ever did before, when—

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Who are you?”

 

“Um, excuse me?”

 

“Oh, pardon my manners.” Namjoon fixes his tone. “Where’s Doctor Kim?”

 

“I’m Doctor…” the man’s face suddenly lit up with realization. “Oh! You mean Seokjin? Yeah, he suddenly took a day off today. I’m his cousin, Junmyeon. Did you have a specific appointment with him? Would you like to reschedule the appointment?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dejectedly, Junmyeon’s shoulders sag as he turns around and walks out of the room, ignoring the calls of the doctor inside. He murmurs a thank you to the receptionist and makes his way outside. Such a perfect day, he thinks as he hears birds chirping in the trees next to the clinic. The sky was blue, the clouds were white, and it wasn’t even hot at all. What a perrrrfect day, he thinks as he drops his head, puts his hands in his pockets, and starts walking to his favorite café. He knows nothing could make him feel better today than his usual dose of caffeine.

 

 

 

 

He steps inside and the smell of freshly brewed coffee instantly wafts his nostrils, his mood lightening up almost instantly. He strides to the counter, orders his usual café latte, and makes his way to his usual table by the window. Customers were starting to flood in by the time he got his drink but he didn’t mind it at all. Not like he had anything to do all day, anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A few moments later, out of the corner of his eye, he sees someone heading straight towards his table. He wouldn’t mind anyone sitting across him, though; it was getting a little crowded in the café and his table had an extra chair. Besides, he didn’t mind talking to a complete stranger today. He would love to be able to get the load off of his chest by talking to someone who didn’t know him well enough to judge.

 

 

He gets his face ready for his hi-I-wanna-be-friends smile when the stranger stops behind the chair in front of him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Hi, mind if I sit here?”

 

 

 

Namjoon freezes. His eyes, still trained on his café latte, widen. He looks up to see the smiling man, and whimpers a little internally.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There he was, that guy that made Namjoon’s insides feel like freezing up and bursting in flames at the same time. His heart starts to race and he finds himself at a loss for words so he chooses to shake his head in response instead, thinking that his godliness might be proven once again if he says something stupid. The doctor, now in his casual wear, looked even more stunning than he did in his lab coat. After he’s seated, Namjoon completely avoids looking at him.

 

 

 

Unfortunately, he makes it a tad bit obvious.

 

 

 

First off, he stares into the distance through the store window on his right. He looks down and sees insects crawling aimlessly on the window sill but pays no attention to them. Shifting his gaze, he turns to his left and pretends to look interested at the menu on the blackboard that was hanging over the cashier. He proceeds to feign interest in his arm, his shoes (Seokjin’s shoes, really; they looked plenty interesting), back to his cup, and finally look at his watch.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Time elapsed: 3 minutes.

 

 

 

 

Ohhhh shiiiiit this is awkwaaaard, Namjoon thinks to himself as he shifts in his seat. He contemplates on his love-hate relationship with the gods because while he did get to meet the love-of-his-life, he had already lost all the courage he tried to muster up in the past week. Besides, seeing the doctor in his favorite coffee shop not dressed in his doctor uniform caught him totally off-guard so he now had to gather up courage to a new and higher level to be able to talk to the guy.

 

 

But this could be an opportunity to redeem myself! He gets excited and starts re-strategizing. Jimin’s plans could also work here. I could just strike up a conversation with him out of the blue because this is a coffee shop. You come here to drink coffee and have a good time, right? Besides, I don’t think he even remembers me. He would have said something if h—

 

 

 

 

“Um… Namjoon?”

 

 

Crap.

 

 

Snapping out of his reverie, Namjoon realizes he had been glaring at the back of his cup for a little while know. Embarrassed, Namjoon nervously looks up only to see the doctor leaning forward on the table, eyes trying to search his. He feels his face flush and his heartbeat picks up speed again at how close they were to each other and he hopes his somehow darker complexion would cover up all of that. “Um… h-how… w-w-what are y-you—?“

 

 

Seokjin, still concentrated on looking for something on Namjoon’s face, scrunches up his eyebrows in the process and inches his way closer to Namjoon. When he hears the latter pipe up, however, he snaps back to his chair, sitting properly, like how a doctor would. “Oh. Well, I, uh… saw your name on that,” he points to the café latte Namjoon was holding. “You looked like you were having some sort of panic attack earlier and then you started glaring at your drink. I wanted to check if you were alright.”

 

 

Namjoon’s face blanks as his mind fills with internal screaming, keyboard smashes, replays of Seokjin’s “I wanted to check if you were alright”, and images of himself frolicking in meadows infested with flowers and hills that are alive. Namjoon, surprisingly, was a person who could keep a straight face while imagining those sort of things.

 

 

Waving his hands in front of Namjoon’s face in an attempt to break him out of his apparently imprisoned mind, Seokjin decides to snap his fingers instead and it works. Namjoon’s body shakes as he reverts back to the real world, eyes widening in the process. “Are you sure you’re okay? Do you want me to take you to a hospital or something?” Seokjin asks worriedly.

 

 

“No, I-I’m good,” Namjoon chokes out. He recalled his plan and it seemed like it was now or never for him. “I’m just really, uh, you know… deep in thought… I guess.” “Be casual”: nailed it!

 

“Oh,” Seokjin sits back on his chair. “Okay then. Why, though? Are you going through something?”

 

“Hm? Oh! No, no, not going through anything. At all. Hehehe…” Namjoon scratches his nape.

 

Seokjin tilts his head in confusion but continues. “Okay, that’s… good. What do you do for a living?”

 

“I’m a DJ at this studio I work at. We sometimes go on air and I sometimes… you know… DJ… and stuff like that.” What. The. Hell. Is. Wrong. With. You.

 

But it seemed to pique Seokjin’s interest. “Ooh, that’s cool! Do you play music when you DJ too?” he excitedly asks.

 

 

“Uh, yeah,” Namjoon answers, finally easing into the flow of the conversation, seeing as Seokjin didn’t know a thing about being a DJ and he seemed pretty interested in what Namjoon was saying. “I make mixtapes, too. I play them on the show sometimes, when I feel like I did a pretty good job.” “Talk about your job to not make yourself look like a hobo”: well, this would have worked better in the clinic but I guess I did alright.

 

 

“What about you?” Namjoon asks casually as he casually sips on his casual café latte. Sticking to the guidelines. “What do you do for a living?”

 

 

 

“I work in a clinic, don’t you remember?” Seokjin takes a sip of his drink as well. “I saw you for at least two times already in there.”

 

 

 

 

Namjoon nearly literally chokes this time because how could you be so stupid Namjoon, causing Seokjin to stand up from his seat and rush over to Namjoon’s side with worry etched on his face. Namjoon gets flustered all over again and starts coughing, at the same time signaling Seokjin to go back to his own seat. “I’m fine /cough/ and yeah I /cough/ do remember /cough/ going /cough/ to the /clears throat/ clinic.” Namjoon wipes his eyes because tears were starting to form due to all the coughing and misses Seokjin’s subtle giggling.

 

 

While Namjoon straightens himself, Seokjin asks, “So I guess I don’t have to ask you how you’re breathing’s going, huh.”

 

 

“Yeah,” Namjoon answers. He rubs his arms and shamefully laughs at himself. “I’m doing a lot better now, thank you.” And for the first time that afternoon, Namjoon smiles at Seokjin. Full-on eye contact, no more shyness, just boldness and a heap of wishful thinking.

 

 

And Seokjin, thank all that is heavenly, smiles back. “That’s too bad though,” he states as he takes another sip of his coffee. “Won’t get to see you anymore.”

 

 

 

 

Namjoon’s smile widens, making his eyes crinkle at the sides, and letting his perfect teeth show. He lowers his head and shakes it because I didn’t need your help, Jimin. bOOYAH and was still smiling when he lifts it back up, looking Seokjin straight in the eye. “We can do something about that.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

They talk the rest of the afternoon off, learning more things about each other than one could ever learn on a proper first date. The twinkle in their eyes as they talk to one another signify something that could turn into more, and they both think they want that. They exchange contact details as they get up to leave, and Namjoon’s words to himself earlier would be forever instilled in his mind: coffee shops are for coffee and having a great time. The sun was setting when they headed out of the café and Namjoon thinks that it really is a perfect day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Hey, before I forget… you fell on your behind the first time we met, right?”

 

 

 

 

 

Aw, man.

 

 

 

 

 

 

/end.

--okay, sorry for using different words for b/utt because aff kept taking them out when i used b/utt or a/ss