“Baby, can you please tell me what’s going on?” Donghae pleads as Hyukjae passes him and makes his way towards the bedroom. “Why are you mad at me?”

Hyukjae slams the door shut and the sound echoes in their full house. He dives into the bed, and he ignored Donghae’s voice on the other side of the door.

“Is it something I did?” Donghae continues. “Please tell me. Please, Hyukjae.”

Hyukjae takes a deep breath, and pulls the door open with force. Donghae stops, his jaw tense. Hyukjae pushes him back, and he storms toward the living room where his stuff is carelessly thrown around. He rips open his bag and produces the missing flyer and some more of Leeteuk’s files.

“What were you doing six years ago?” Hyukjae interrogates, his voice hard. He fists the papers in his hand, wrinkling them.

Donghae’s eyebrows scrunched together, utterly confused. “I finished university with a degree in music and moved up here in the city. I’ve been taking on many jobs and chasing companies and artists to become a songwriter.”

“Did you have any other car?”

“What? No, I’ve always had the red convertible. My father and I got it and repaired since it was vintage.”

“When did you learn guitar?”

“My father taught me when I was a kid,” Donghae replies patiently. “Hyukkie, please. What’s going on?”

“Did you have any pets? What’s your favorite color?”

Donghae stares at Hyukjae incredulously. “No, I never had pets. My favorite color is blue.”

Hyukjae shakes his head. Wrong, wrong. Yoona says his favorite color is black. Nothing he says lines up with her story.

“Have you been with anybody?”

“Well, other than the ex-boyfriends that I told you about...Hyuk, they don’t matter, you’re the only one I’ve been so serious with, why are you doing this?”

Hyukjae glares at Donghae. “I looked them up and they didn’t even exist!” He shouts. His eyes widen at his outburst. He's not a fan of fighting, but whenever it comes to Donghae, he couldn't help his feelings.

Donghae gapes at him. “What are you talking about?”

Hyukjae tries his best to not let his emotions get in the way, but he’s not as strong as before. Donghae made him need him, made him so dependent on him. “What am I to you?”

Donghae bites his lip, his shoulders tensing. “You’re the love of my life, Hyukjae. Will you please tell me what I did to make you angry? I promise, whatever it is, we can work through it.”

Hyukjae takes a deep breath, and he hands the flyer to Donghae. It feels like he’s ripping the bandaid off a gaping wound.

Donghae takes the flyer into his hands, staring at it, but his eyes start to boil in annoyance and disbelief. “Is this a prank? Hyukjae, I swear…”

“Just read it!” Hyukjae snaps, gesturing at the flyer violently.

Donghae studies the information, glancing at Hyukjae at the same time. “I don’t get it. Missing? I’ve never even heard of this person.”

Hyukjae watches Donghae helplessly. Those eyes were so bare that he can see that Donghae is telling the truth.

“I promise you that I don’t know her,” Donghae repeats, willing Hyukjae to believe him. “Hyukjae, I would never lie to you.”

“I know,” Hyukjae said. “God, Donghae. I know.”

Donghae treads carefully, and balls up the paper. He slowly pulls Hyukjae towards him, watching his face for any sign of his resistance. He finds none. His eyes catch the silver band on his hand, and he couldn’t help the leap of happiness his heart is making.

“You’re wearing it,” Donghae comments, trying to mask the joy in his eyes. It didn’t seem right to celebrate right at the moment.

Hyukjae blinks, and his eyes finally soften. “It’s up to you, Hae.” He meets Donghae’s sad gaze. “I’m not kidding around with that flyer, but I’m willing to stick with every decision you’ll make.”

Donghae pulls Hyukjae to him by his neck and then surrounds his arms around his slim frame. “I don’t know what to do. Please tell me,” he whispers. “Guide me.” He is growing confused by every second that passes by, but the only thing that is clear to him as daylight is the man in his arms.

Hyukjae slowly encircles his arms around Donghae’s neck and buries himself into his warmth. “Okay. Let me know where to stop, then.”

~

The three of them stared at the table in front of them awkwardly. Hyukjae seriously wanted to run out of the apartment and just breathe any air that isn’t Donghae, but he knows that the man needs him here. After briefing Donghae on what he thinks is happening with him, they both agreed to meet Yoona and get to know Donghae's past life.

He can tell that he’s really anxious and clueless by the way his eyes are widening and his forehead is wrinkling. Hyukjae is torn between fussing on him and slapping him to give him some sense.

“I see you’re doing well,” Yoona begins, her voice solemn. “I know you’re not much of a talker…so I don’t expect you to suddenly tell me everything all at once.”

Hyukjae tries hard not to exclaim in surprise. Donghae, not being talkative? The two of them had spent countless nights just talking. Donghae is a blunt person and he never cared to hide his feelings.

Donghae looks at anywhere, clearly uncomfortable. “Yoona?” Donghae tries out, the name foreign in his tongue. “I’m really sorry, but I don’t know what you expect me to do.”

Hyukjae wants to smack the rudeness off of Donghae’s demeanor. At the same time, he guiltily feels proud of him.

“That’s okay, I just want you to listen,” Yoona said.

Again, Hyukjae admires her unwavering determination. Maybe, he should take notes. She’s really fighting for him with all that she’s got.

She lays out pictures of him and their family, and it beats the photos of him and Donghae around their house. Hyukjae’s heart squeezed painfully when he saw a picture of Donghae holding a baby girl, and another one where he’s changing a baby boy’s diapers. Somehow, it fits his image.

Donghae could have had a normal life. A stable one, where society didn’t judge him for it.

“You grew up in Mokpo,” Yoona explains. “We started dating in high school, and you promised to marry me once you had enough money to buy us a future.”

Hyukjae glances at Donghae’s blank face, knowing that the man is really thinking about this seriously. Although he understands that Donghae has no clue what she’s talking about because he conjured his own memories, he feels sorry for him. This is his reality, and he wonders what went wrong so badly that he had to run away this far from his old life.

Donghae massaged his temples, a little irked. The conversation had gone on too long to the point that Yoona is insisting on him.

“I have a headache,” Donghae rudely states.

Hyukjae glares at Donghae. “Dude. Not cool.”

Yoona bites her lip and she nods. “Okay, I’ll leave.”

“Don’t come back,” Donghae says angrily as she made her way out.

Yoona gives him one disappointed look, and leaves.

Hyukjae purses his lips, watching Donghae massage his temple. “You okay?”

Donghae rubs his face. “I really have no clue what she’s talking about. She’s not trying to take me from you, right?” He asks in a paranoid way.

Hyukjae gulps. “Donghae, calm down. She’s not trying to do anything. She’s upset. She’s someone who knew you way back.”

“That makes no sense. I’ve never seen her before that other day.”

Hyukjae stares into space, and Donghae makes his way to their shared bedroom alone.

He tries not to cry, feeling like he had no right to. He’s torn between helping Donghae, and whisking him away so that he won’t have to find out more about his old life. He doesn’t know what to do.

He trudged slowly towards their bedroom, and he pauses at the door where he can hear Donghae strumming his guitar softly. Deciding to listen for a minute, he realizes that Donghae is playing one of the songs that he had written for him. His soft voice beckons Hyukjae to come closer...and that’s what he did.

Donghae pauses, his hand hovering above the strings. He looks at Hyukjae, his whole attention to him.

“Do you love me?” Hyukjae asks, his eyes on the ground. His fingers unconsciously play with the hem of his shirt. This is a question he just needed to keep asking the latter, because so many people had used those three words for the wrong reasons. 

Donghae sets his guitar aside then walks over to Hyukjae and takes his hands. “Of course, I love you. Why would you even ask me that?”

“I don’t know...I feel like you’re going to leave me.”

“I’m not.” Donghae sighs and brings Hyukjae’s hands to his lips.

“How could you say that? How can you promise me such big things when you had a whole life before me, Donghae. What if you remember all that, and forget me?”

“You’re my life now, Hyukjae. I know only you. Do you hear me? So what if I had a life before this? All I know is that this is who I am now, with you.”

I’m so ing selfish. “Hae…”

“I love you so much, Hyukjae. You have no idea how much I love you.”

Hyukjae leans forward, and places his hands on Donghae’s neck. “Show me you love me.” His lips pout temptingly. 

Donghae smirks, the events that happened earlier forgotten. “Gladly.”