Youngjae couldn't sleep, he woke up, and he went out,leaving a note for his friend saying he was just going out for while.It was 3 am, he went out, feeling the cold morning air. He walked, and he was surprised to see people walking around, at this late hour. But that wasn't important to him, he was thinking about Daehyun.He laughed at the fact he still worries about him, but he knew, there was no way he wouldn't care for the guy.He smiled, but tears were flowing, as if they are telling him to go back, but he couldn't.He remembered he had to take his luggage from the apartment, and he was heading to his house unwillingly.

 

 

 

 

He knew he couldn't take back what he said, and hoped he would lived a happier life in the states.He looked up at the dark sky, as if wishing his feelings for Daehyun would be gone, be forgotten. But what he was truly wishing for Daehyun to love him back.

 

 

 

 

Youngjae walked, and he saw Daehyun, wondering why he was outside.He sighed as he went to carry Daehyun on his back, and went inside his house.He put Daehyun down at his bed, and smiled at the sleeping man.

 

 

 

 

"Still so peaceful, so beautiful"Youngjae whispered, as he smiled at him.

 

 

 

 

He then went to take his luggage, but then suddenly,Daehyun sleeptalk, he was still fast asleep.

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae~"

 

 

 

 

 

Youngjae turned, as he saw a smile on Daehyun's face, wondering what was wrong with Daehyun. Then, Daehyun's face changed, it looked like he was going to cry, like he was under a lot of pain.Youngjae blinked, as Daehyun turned over, holding on to his blanket tightly.

 

 

 

 

 

"Daehyun..."Youngjae was worried, yes he was always worried about him. He then looked at the watch, it was 5 am and he cooked breakfast, wrapping Daehyun's and placed it on the table. He then wrote a note, and went off. 

 

 

 

 

He shook his head, not believing what he just did. It was like they are still a couple, but they aren't.He didn't mind, he was going away soon anyway.

 

 

 

As he went to his friends' house, and they got ready to go to the airport.

 

 

 

 

They both went there together, and sees their boss waiting for them.Their boss smiled,as he started to tell them some news. Youngjae was listening attentively, and he raised his hand,volunteering himself.The boss nodded,and they all went inside the plane.Youngjae, was silently dying inside, hoping he would go back to Korea soon.

 

 

 

 

Daehyun woke up, feeling he was on his bed. He sat up straight, rubbing his eyes. He was in his room, was this a dream? He went out of his bed, and saw a familiar plate, wrapped with food. He went to the table, smiling. He knew Youngjae had cook for him again, maybe for the last time. He then saw a note, knowing it was Youngjae's handwriting.

 

 

 

 

'Why are you sleeping outside?

 

 

You were so cold when I carry you in.

 

 

Take care of yourself.

 

 

I am going.

 

 

Bye."

 

 

 

 

Daehyun's faded as he realised something.

 

 

 

Youngjae and him had broke up, Youngjae was already in the states now.

 

 

 

Youngjae had left him.

 

 

 

Daehyun slumped down at his chair as he stared at the food Youngjae had cook for him. Unknowingly, tears were flowing down, Daehyun was thinking of Youngjae.He then unwrapped the plate, tasting the food.

 

 

 

 

It was delicious, Youngjae was a good cook,Daehyun remembered the other food Youngjae would make for him, and now, he was trying to cherish Youngjae's last dish.The food was gone, Daehyun smiled, as he savored the taste of Youngjae's food.

 

 

 

 

"We are breaking up"

 

 

 

 

Youngjae voice repeated in his head, he couldn't accept the fact Youngjae was still smiling, that stupid loving and bright smile of his that Daehyun loved so much as he told him this. His voice, so sweet to hear and listen, and Daehyun was imagining Youngjae was here, staring at him with his sparkling eyes, and was smiling to him. He stared at the illusion, reaching out to touch it, but soon it faded.Daehyun shook his head violently, trying to not think of Youngjae anymore.

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae.."Daehyun cried, as he tried to think properly.

 

 

 

 

Daehyun knew he was the type to fool around with girls, he loved Youngjae a lot more than those girls.Those girls would be all over him, he didn't want anything to do with them.

 

 

 

He loved Youngjae,and Daehyun knew he wanted to be love by Youngjae.

 

 

 

He didn't get any love from him as Youngjae was working hard, and Daehyun was selfish, he went around, looking for girls to love him like Youngjae. Daehyun didn't have a heart, he didn't consider Youngjae having feelings for him anymore, and he consistently look around for people to love him.

 

 

 

 

He knew there were none, none of them were like Youngjae. None, there was only one Youngjae that loved him. But Daehyun was greedy, he still went on, and he didn't feel any good. He started to drink, he was stressed that he feels Youngjae wasn't there for him, Youngjae wasn't there to love him.

 

 

 

 

 

All Daehyun wanted was to be love by Youngjae, he wanted to feel loved, but Youngjae was working.Daehyun could have work too, but he was a lazy bum, a slacker.

 

 

 

 

Daehyun went on drinking, and he would go all giddy. He was able to come home,knowing Youngjae would get worried about him.Youngjae was sleeping in the couch, Daehyun was too tired to notice.

 

 

 

 

Daehyun didn't know Youngjae caught him cheating on him. Daehyun wasn't feeling that he was loved enough, that's all.

 

 

 

 

 

But he felt guilty doing all these, knowing he just wanted Youngjae, to be with him now. He was home, drunk and he looked over to Youngjae.

 

 

 

 

He was sleeping, his face was pretty, his cheeks are squishy and kissable, his lips were red, and Youngjae was hugging his favourite pillow.

 

 

 

 

 

He smiled and peck his cheek. He went to bed, smiling as he felt so happy kissing Youngjae.

 

 

 

 

He had a date, and he was spacing out, thinking what Youngjae was doing. He was annoyed, truly, with the girl chattering and babbling about something.He then turned to his left and saw Youngjae walking past him. His eyes were special, it help Daehyun to identify Youngjae.

 

 

 

 

He stood up,wanting to ask Youngjae why he wasn't at work, but Youngjae didn't turned back. He stood staring at his back, wanting Youngjae to hug him badly.

 

 

 

 

He then went to the club at night, drinking and drinking like the usual, and that was when Youngjae appeared, being cheerful and adorable.

 

 

 

Daehyun knew it was too late to meet Youngjae at the airport, it was noon now, and Daehyun was already starting to change since Youngjae absence.He noticed Youngjae left his pillow, and he went to hugged it tightly.

 

 

 

 

 

He was always at the night club at night, sitting alone with his drink, drinking like it was no one's business. He was feeling so dazed, even if he wasn't drinking.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He was in the apartment, alone, in the day, staying at the couch where Youngjae used to sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He  would be hugging the yellow pillow tightly, as he tried to sleep on the couch.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He wasn't happy, heck, he was suffering, as he tried desperately to get the feelings that he bottled up inside out. He couldn't, but could only wait, as he cried his heart out, still clinging on to Youngjae's pillow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae..."Daehyun whispered, as he looked at the television screen blankly, imagining that there was Youngjae there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"You... leave me, and I tried hard, so hard to forget you, but I couldn't."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Why is that? Why am I missing you, why am I reminded of you?!"Daehyun threw the pillow away, crying out more.He then picked   the pillow back, hugging it tightly as he closed his eye,trying to sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Why do you leave me, when I am loving you?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Daehyun was losing weight, he wasn't eating properly, his friends were worried, and when ask why he wasn't eating, Daehyun would glared at them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I want only Youngjae's cooking"He spoke harshly and leave them alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

His friend would noticed Daehyun would bring around this yellow pillow everywhere, even in the night club. It was weird and sad to see him like this, Daehyun was clinging onto the pillow like his life depended on it, he wasn't meeting anyone anymore, he was alone, even when concerned girls wanted to help him, he shooed them away saying it wasn't necessary.He told him he was waiting for someone when some girls wanted to go out with him.He wouldn't be laughing in the club with his friends like he used to, he totally changed.Girls found him cute for holding the pillow by him, everywhere he go.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I am waiting for you, Youngjae"Daehyun would say to the pillow in whispers, making his friends pity him more.Daehyun had lost his mind perhaps, but Daehyun already knew he could erase Youngjae form his heart, and he was missing him badly.He was waiting for Youngjae to come back, even he knew Youngjae would stay there, that he would never come back to him, but he waited, just for Youngjae.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This when on for two weeks, Daehyun was really in bad condition, he was at the night club, drinking. He then went out, he was drunk.He hugged the pillow tightly, and suddenly some guy went up to him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Nice pillow you have there"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"What do you want?"The guy then snatched the pillow away from Daehyun, making Daehyun angry. Daehyun fought with the guy punching him in the face, before taking the pillow away from him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"What the!?"The guy shouted to Daehyun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"You try to take this pillow away from me again, you die."Daehyun spoke coldly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"That pillow is important to you? It is dirty-"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Shut up! It belonged to someone special to me!"Daehyun glared at the guy, the guy nodded, apologising to him.The guy went away, clearly scared of Daehyun,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"D-Daehyun?"Daehyun turned at the familiar voice, Youngjae was looking at him, now, with his luggage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Youngjae was shocked to see Daehyun, he was thinner, he wasn't in good shape, he was holding a pillow and he just punched the hell out of the guy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Y-Youngjae? I thought you were in the states?"Daehyun was happy Youngjae was back here in Korea, happy seeing him healthy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Are you crazy?I told you to take care of yourself! You just punched the guy, you are thinner! Jung Daehyun, what's wrong?" Youngjae asked, he was really angry, why was Daehyun in a bad condition like this? He would beat up the person who made him like this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"We...broke up right?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Yeah, we did"Youngjae spoke and Daehyun threw the pillow at him, and would glared at people who was looking at him. He would then pick a fight with one of them, and Youngjae pulled Daehyun away to an empty alley nearby.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Are you crazy!?Why are you like this?"Youngjae was crying, Daehyun was never like this, so thin, so weak, but to Youngjae, Daehyun was still beautiful, but he wanted to know what happened to him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Are you drunk?"Youngjae asked, as he held onto the pillow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Daehyun?Youngjae!"One of Daehyun's friend appeared, happy to see Youngjae.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae, you better help Daehyun. He was upset about the breakup, he was clinging onto that pillow,he muttered about waiting for you and he said that he would only eat your food..."Youngjae looked at the friend, Daehyun was like this because of him.Daehyun was drunk.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae"Daehyun said happily as he took the pillow from Youngjae and hugged it tightly. He then looked into Youngjae's eyes, Daehyun was tearing up.

 

 

 

 

 

"I fly into a rage at your words of leaving me

 

Get drunk, hit the wall, knock shoulders with innocent people

 

I curse, I fight, what are you looking at

 

The world hates me, I hate it right back"

 

 

 

 

 

Daehyun rapped, and Youngjae was already crying at these point. Daehyun then hold out his hand to Youngjae,Youngjae holding his hand tightly making Daehyun smile.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"You look at me, you are disappointed in me

But I’m serious, I’ll go crazy without you

Do you think I’m doing this for no reason, you’re crying too

Because I still love you, I go to my knees

Because I’m sorry, I hold on to you

I won’t make promises or excuses, just please don’t go"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Daehyun, but we already-"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Oh~ my ever-forgiving love

Although I gave you nothing but tears

But I still only think of you

I can live only when you’re next to me, you know

Come back to me Oh, I’m perfect only with you by my side

You know it, come back to me Oh"

 

 

 

 

 

Daehyun hugged Youngjae, with the pillow.Youngjae then noticed the pillow was his, and undertsood what Daehyun meant when he was talking to the guy he punched earlier.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Y-Youngjae.....I am sorry..."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Daehyun-"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I am sorry but I love you, come back to me.Please"Youngjae was also crying, he was happy to know Daehyun still love him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"D-Daehyun"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"An 80-year-old marriage also has a fight once every week

But they still keep loving each other, you mean the same to me

Every day is filled with excuses and tempers and egos

But you’re my dream, my love, a love without an answer

You’re the answer to me, that how I really feel inside"

 

 

 

 

 

Daehyun rapped again, this time to Youngjae's ear and he noticed his friend was gone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Daehyun, I came back as the boss said he needed someone to manage his business in Korea as he had to work in the states permanently, I agreed, and I just came back, and was hoping to find you here"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Youngjae, I miss you,I love you,please come back."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I am back"

 

 

 

 

Song used- You're the answer for a guy like me by Leessang