Chapter 9 - Our Messed up Families

-Allison’s POV-

Don’t bash your head in to the wall, don’t bash her head into the wall, try not to commit murder, the last thing you need is to be thrown into prison. I keep repeating these sentences in my head, saying them over and over like a mantra, hoping that it will calm my nerves.

“Oh my goodness Allie, will you look at this dress; doesn’t it look gorgeous?!” My mother is all big smiles, but her glaring eyes warn me that I better agree with her or else…

God dammit, I need a drink! Who am I kidding? I can’t keep calm, even an angel would easily swear after meeting my mother.

“Allie darling the dress, go and try it on.” I’d like nothing more than to wipe that silly smile of her face; honestly that smile could give little kids nightmares. Too bad I’m not a little kid anymore and have no excuse as to why I’m so scared of her.

Because it is kind of weird isn’t it? That I’m scared of my own mother. The woman who is from my flesh and blood, the very woman who carried me around in her womb for nine months and looked after me for the nineteen years that I’ve been alive. Too bad that she only did it so she could sell me off at the right time.

Just when I’d promised myself that I had been through moping, that I had finally come to terms with my messed up life, that I had decided to start a fresh; the wicked witch of the west shows up and ruins everything. Any girl would probably dream of having her mother at her wedding, but not me. Na-ah, I did definitely not sign up for this. In fact I’ve been trying to listen to calm music and practice yoga ever since my mother called me two days ago to inform me that she was boarding the airplane as we spoke, and that she expected me to pick her and Dave up at the airport in exactly eleven hours.

“Allison!”

Yes, I had been trying to meditate in the last two days, too bad that not even a personal meditation session with Gandhi could have cleansed my soul enough to be able to go through this ‘wedding’ dress shopping with my mum and Mrs Do, and still manage to keep my sanity by the end of it.

I rub my temples as I eye the dress in my mother’s hand, “does it really need to be so frilly and puffy?”

My mother tries her hardest to not role her eyes in front of my future mother in law. “What are you talking about? It’s a wedding dress! It’s meant to look like this!”

“If I may Mina-ssi, maybe Allie would prefer something more elegant and less on the girly side.” Mrs Do asks.

My mother gives a resigned sigh, not wanting to show a bad face in front her peer, “I guess we could look at some more dresses Hyerim-ssi.”

The owner of the shop and her assistants run out to bring yet another pile of new dresses as I throw Mrs Do a grateful look. This whole dreaded dress shopping was just something I could not delay any longer. The first thing my mother did once she stepped on her countries soil after fourteen years, was to call Kyungsoo’s mother and talk to her about the wedding plans.

“There’s so much to be done! We must get to it at once, after all this wedding needs to be perfect, no less is accepted from our families.”

I glared at her, but Dave managed to step in and stop me from grabbing her stupid phone and throwing it into the Han River. Damn you international phone services!

Dave brought me into a big bear hug and ruffled my hair. “Hey kiddo, how are you holding up?”

I look into his kind eyes and decided to maintain my cool face. “I’m fine Dave.”

My phone call with Dave a few days before their flight had been quiet memorable. My mother hadn’t even bothered to tell him any of this whole arrangement until a few days before their trip. The poor guy didn’t even know that they were going to go on a trip to Korea in the first place, let alone that he would be making the trip to attend my wedding.

“What do you mean you’re getting married?!” He shouted over the phone. “Is that what you’re doing over there? Planning a wedding?! Why didn’t you tell me?! Who is this boy and when did you fall in love with him?!”

His throng of questions made my head dizzy, but I learnt that my mother had not told her husband the whole story. Apparently Dave didn’t know that I was being forced into this marriage and he naively thought that Kyungsoo and I had some how fallen in love in this short amount of time and decided to get married with our own free will.

“You’re just nineteen! A mere baby! Don’t you think you should think this out a little more Allie? Why don’t you come back home and we can talk about it?”

Now Dave has always been a pillar in my life. I don’t want to call him a father figure, because I already have a father and just one of him is already too much thank you very much. I like to think of Dave as more of my friend. An old friend who has always watched out for me and genuinely cares for me. So in that moment I decide to lie to Dave too. What use would it be if I told him the truth about this marriage? He’ll probably demand the whole thing to be canceled and that will start of a fight between him and my father. And as much as I love and depend on Dave; I know that he can never win against someone like my father. I don’t want any more people to be hurt by this marriage.

“Everything’s been already planned Dave,” I say with a heavy heart. “I can’t back out now, and besides I…” I took a deep breath, “I love him,” I finally managed to say.  

“Fine, if you’re happy, then so am I.”

“Ok, how about this one?” my mother asks, holding up a dress equally hideous as the last one she picked. I sigh as I wish that I had brought Dave with me to this dress shoping. But my mother demanded that he stay in their hotel room.

“No men allowed! This is bonding time between you and your two mothers.”

God I want to brake something.

 -Kyungsoo’s POV-

“Ow! Watch where you put that needle!” I shout as our family seamstress cowers a little as he adjusts the needles with more care. I sigh, I didn’t mean to snap at him but this whole situation has made me cranky. Getting fitted for a my wedding suit at the age of nineteen, soon to be married to a girl I’ve only seen once…well who would have ever seen that coming? Definitely not me.

“I think I have your measures now sir, you just need to have a final fitting a few days from now.” The seamstress says in a small voice.

I just nod my head and rush of to change my clothes. The quicker I get out of these retched things, the better.

I’ve changed into normal clothes and am heading out to my car when one of the maids stops me.

“I’m sorry sir, but your father has asked to talk to you.” Says she.

I grit my teeth but nod anyway. Of course the old man wants something. He’s been surprising quiet these last few days. Ever since that ‘family dinner’ he has hardly talked to me, and I must say that I couldn’t have been happier…but I guess that all good things must come to an end.

I reluctantly throw my car keys in my pocket and change my route to my father’s office. EXO will just have to wait a little longer for me, first I need to take care of this big problem.

I knock at my father’s door and enter apprehensively when his firm voice tells me to.

“Sit,” he says.

“No thank you,” I reply with a cold voice. “I’m in a hurry.”

“Fine,” he says, getting up to pour himself a drink. “Did you get your suit fitted?”

 “Yes,” I decide to stick to one word answers; this way there’s a less chance of me losing my temper. I don’t need a fight right now.

“You know your mother’s with Allison, picking a wedding dress. Her family have just flown over from England.” He announces as he takes a sip from his drink.

I just nod my head as I clench my fists. Where is he going with this exactly?

“I presume that you’ve broken things off with that girl already?” he asks, an impassive look on his face.

I can literally feel my jaw drop. How can he ask me such a question without even a hint of guilt or remorse? I still try to keep my calm. I don’t want to fall into his trap and give him the satisfaction of winding me up. “Yes,” I all put spit out.

“Good. Because I want to make something very clear to you Kyungsoo, so listen well. Whatever funny business you were planning before, you can forget about it right now.”

I look at my father with wide eyes. What is he talking about?

“The marriage is fast approaching and none of your stupid plans will get you out of it. Don’t think I didn’t notice the glares you were throwing at Jee’s daughter. What did you think with yourself? That you’d marry her for a moth or two, treat her badly, get a divorce and then elope with that girl?”

My jaw drops again and this time I don’t even bother to try to close it. Because I am shocked. Shocked at how he can read me so well. Shocked and slightly ashamed when he phrases my master plan like that. Sure my plan may seem heartless, but this situation asks for heartless acts. I don’t even know my future wife, I don’t owe her anything! And I sure as hell am not going to spend the rest of my life with her.

“I must say Kyungsoo that you are a fool,” my father says as he looks at me. “Did you really think that I wouldn’t think about this part? You think that I would let you divorce the heir of the Jee Company to be with a nobody?! You think I would let you disgrace our family name like that?!”

“Why do you care about money so much?!” I finally shout, my cold exterior melting. “You already have bank accounts fall of it… so why does it mean so much to you?!”

“This isn’t about money Kyungsoo,” my father says, shaking his head. “It’s about the order of the world. It’s about you knowing your place and that so called love of yours learning hers.”

I’m about to retort, when my father holds up a hand to stop me, “I don’t want to here anymore,” he says. “In time you will come to understand what I mean, but for now I need you to sign this.”

I look at the paper he is presenting me with. “What is this?” I ask confused.

“An agreement,” he says finally finishing his drink. “I’ve had my lawyer make a contract that you will forfeit your right to asking for a divorce and all divorce rights will be handed to your wife.”

“What?!” I scream. Has this man finally lost his mind?!

“That’s right. You will not be allowed to file a divorce after your marriage. That right will only belong to your wife. But you needn’t worry. No one else will know about this contract except you and me and my lawyer. I don’t want you to be embarrassed. I don’t want people to know that I don’t trust you enough to make the right decisions.”

“Embarrassed? Embarrassed?! You think that’s the reason why I won’t sign it?!” I’m close to hysterics now, but I no longer care. “I’m not signing that, you’re mad if you think I am!”

“Tell me Kyungsoo, what will your dear ex-girlfriend’s family do if her dad was to lose his job?” my father glares at me, daring me to fight him. My breath catches a little as I look into his unforgiving eyes. “I know they barely make the ends meet with the amount of money he makes at his current job. But what would happen, if god forbid, he was suddenly fired? Tell me, will you be able to live knowing that you’re the reason her family are on the streets? Because I can make that nightmare happen Kyungsoo, so don’t test my patience.”

I suddenly understand the feeling a caged bird has when it looks into the eyes of the predator cat and recoils in a corner because it can’t fly away. It’s trapped. I’m trapped. Trapped and locking eyes with the monster sitting in front of me. He has cornered me into a cage and the final key he needs to forever trap me is waiting on his desk, in the form of a paper that will forever ruin my life.

I can through that key away, cut the paper into little shreds and fly away from the cage before it’s too late… but what will I be leaving in my wake. Can I stand by as Soobin and her family, people who I’ve come to think as my family, get hurt in my place? Will I ever be able to look in her eyes and tell her that I hurt her when I promised that I never would? When I promised that I would protect her no matter what?

No, I can’t. Because the key has already been thrown in the lock and I’ve already been trapped. My father has me exactly where he wants, and judging by his victorious smirk he knows it. I’m not cold hearted like him. I can’t hurt the people that I’m supposed to be protecting for my own gain. I can’t be like him… I won’t be like him.

I reach down for the pen and quickly sign the paper before I can back out of it. My father takes the paper clearly satisfied, but my heart is sinking… I may as well have just signed the agreement to my death.     

✾Author's Note✾

I'll try to update a few chapters before my exams start ^^