III. Doubting Dreams
I Don't Want to Wake Up and Know a Love That is Not YouWinter was walking along the halls of the building, still talking to Ningning. She's thankful that classes are still on going or she's going to embarrass herself in front of everyone. She was rounding a corner when she bumped with Giselle.
"Hey, hey! Winter, are you alright?"
"Hey, calm down. Where's Ningning?"
Winter didn't know she was crying until Giselle handed her a handkerchief. The girl took her phone from her and talked with Ningning while ushering her outside the building. She just let herself get carried, her energy depleted.
"I already told Ningning. I'm talking you to your apartment. She'll be meeting us there."
Giselle stayed quiet during the entirety of the drive to the apartment. She just occasionally steal glances from the rear mirror, opening only to close it again. Winter was thankful the girl didn't pry. She'd definitely tell her best friend not to let this girl go. When they arrived at the front door of their shared apartment Winter tried to punch the password with her shaking hands, the lock beeped a few times after missing the right number.
"Here, let me." Giselle offered, managed to get it in one go.
Ningning came shortly after. She quickly came to Winter's side and just listened while the other cried, her words being carried out with her tears. To ease the tension, Giselle volunteered to order something to eat. When she was able to calm down, she told Ningning about what happened, letting Giselle listen as she spill her secrets. It's the only thank you she can offer to the girl for taking care of her.
"All this time, I thought it was her. All those dreams, those..."
"Were those just my imagination?" Winter said in between hiccups.
"How many of it was real and how many did I just made up?"
Ningning was holding Winter's hand while Giselle caresses her back to keep her calm, occasionally nodding their heads and giving her some tissues.
"I don't now, Win. We don't know if any of it is real. Maybe you thought she lost but she managed to redeem herself, you know?"
"I saw her drying, protecting me. I haven't told you this yet, but in my other dreams she died in my arms, Ning."
And there, she told Ningning the real reason why she's so attached to this Jimin. Why she is so desperate to find the other girl. It was her eighteen birthday when she dreamed of it, it was around that time when she was so determined in finding more about her dreams. They were in the middle of the battlefield, Jimin in her arms, blood all over her, the line between life and death nearly non-existent. She was crying, they both were. Jimin was dying, and she can't do anything. The noise around them was loud but she can't hear any of it, she focused on the fading sound of Jimin's heartbeat.
"She has to be my First Knight, she swore to stay by my side."
"or did I just made that up, too?"
"Win, I think it's best if you take a rest first. You've been crying for three hours. She's you First Knight if you believe enough that she is."
"You don't understand, Ning! It's what's in my dream, I can't just change it."
Winter was losing her calm again. Ningning's words made it seem like everything was just a made up story she made in her head. A product of her wild imagination that she happens to believe that it is real ㅡ was real.
"Winter, I think what Ning's trying to say is, you haven't finished the dream yet. It's not final without an announcement, right? How about you try to rest and have some sleep. Maybe you can dream of the rest," Giselle chimed in, guiding her to stand up. Repeatedly caressing Winter's back to help her calm down.
Giselle guided Winter to her room and tucked her to bed. There's something with Giselle's calmness that makes her follow whatever the girl says. Her eyes began to close, mainly because of exhaustion, but also because she thinks Giselle is right, there's no announcement, Jimin ca
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