Message: This is a SHORT STORY (ABOUT 10 chapters).

She sat in the dark little fort. She was much too large for it but it didn’t matter to her. With her knees drawn to her chest, her arms hugging them as if they would save her, her chin rested on her bare knees. She stared out of the opening of the grey colored fort and at the window of her flat. Rain stained the pure glass as her own tears stained her rosy cheeks. She closed her eyes and floated away to a world of fantasy and perfection. The grass was green and the sky was blue. There were no buildings and no people. It was untainted and she was standing in the center of it all. Fearful of ruining just one blade of grass, she just stood still and stared straight ahead. On the other side of the world was the one thing that kept her sane and whole.

It felt as though the world was growing, expanding, suddenly. The other side of the world seemed to stretch out into infinity and she couldn’t move forward because she would end up tarnishing her place of peace. She just closed her eyes and opened them in hopes of returning things back to how they once were. But instead, she found her window being showered with rain. She was in the real world which was nothing but a place of flaws. The grass was dull and the sky was dark. There was nothing but buildings and people. It was tainted with truth and bitterness. And she was sitting in the center of it all.

She had never felt so empty before. She hadn’t realized just how much she needed him. If she had known that life without him would be nothing but tears and living life without a soul, she would have held his hand tighter. She would have showed him just how much she loved him. She would have kissed him with every ounce of her heart pouring. She would have loved him much more. If she had known, she would be smiling. She would wear astonishing outfits. She wouldn’t be drinking a cup of black coffee that was once hot. She wouldn’t be wiping away her tears with the sleeves of her oversized sweater. She wouldn’t be sitting in a dark little fort, watching the rain fall.

My heart is struggling, the night is torture, I miss you so much, do you even remember?
I can’t fall asleep, I want to believe just for a second, don’t forget me yet, I’m sorry
I miss you so much, I can’t fall asleep tonight.  I thought it’d be easy back then but how am I crying? You still flicker before me when I close my eyes. But I’ll feel less and less as time goes by. I don’t regret it, I’m just a bit sad. I don’t miss you, I just long for you. (Tonight and Empty – WINNER)

Nam Taehyun, do you long for me as well?

III

His hot breath became visible in amidst the cold rain. The rain caused his dark black hair to plaster his face and his clothes to weigh him down. He didn’t know why he was standing there, looking up at her flat. He hadn’t meant to remember where she lived. He hadn’t meant to cry as he stood in rain. He hadn’t meant to remember how much he loved her. Or how much he still loved her. He just wanted to wake up that morning and act like his heart was still intact. He meant to grab the blue brush sitting next to the pink one. He meant to drink his black coffee from the black cup that stood next to the white one. He meant to wear his light blue dress shirt with khaki pants that she had gifted him on his birthday. He meant to go to work and make songs about being happy and in love. He meant to go back home with no umbrella. But he was standing in front of her building as if he were waiting for her to come down.

He was the one who ended it. He was the one to utter the two words that ended their relationship. He was the one who said, “It’s over”. But standing in the rain, looking up at her flat, he regretted it. He wanted her back in his arms. He just wanted it to be the way it was long ago. He should have fought for her harder. He should have loved her harder. If he had, maybe she would have stayed with him. Maybe she would still be living at her flat and his apartment. Maybe she would still be in love with him.

He took one step forward and just stopped. He wanted to go up to her place. He wanted to knock on her door and wait for her to open the light brown, wooden door. He wanted to pull her into his embrace and ask for her to come back. But he couldn’t. He wasn’t supposed to because he knew that her arms wouldn’t come up to wrap themselves around his waist. She would be in love with another man. She would be in love with his best friend. She would still choose his friend over him. She would still choose Nam Taehyun.

Mino his heels and looked down at the wet pavement. His tears dripped from his eyes like the rain dripped from the heavy clouds. His shoulders shook as he sobbed just as the sky shook with sadness. He walked away like he did when he found out. He let her go and it was the biggest mistake of his life. He gave her up to Taehyun and Taehyun gave her up Mino.

III

His sat on his sofa with whiskey on the rocks in one hand and a burning cigarette in the other. His black tie was loose around his neck and the top few buttons of his nice, white dress shirt were undone. A few strands of his hair fell in front of his face. His eyes were glued to the silver rings on his coffee table. One was thinner and had a gorgeous white diamond settled in it while the other was just a simple silver band.

He leaned over and set his whiskey down on the cold glass and he put out his short cigarette in the black ashtray. He grabbed the rings and placed them in his palms. He just stared at them and slowly, he grew saddened and angry. The diamond ring was supposed to be on her pretty little finger and the band was supposed to be on his finger. But they weren’t. They were sitting in his palm.

She was supposed to be with, lying down on his sofa, her head on his lap and a book in her hands. He was supposed to be working on a new project and getting distracted by her. He was supposed to be whispering that he loved her every other minute. They were supposed to be eating takeout together and watching a movie. They were supposed to be cuddling in bed, eyes closed and listening to the rain pitter and patter on his window. They were supposed to be holding hands and falling asleep. But they weren’t.

He looked up and stared at the white ceiling. He wondered what she was doing in her flat. He wondered if she was missing him or his friend. He wondered if she was eating or napping. He wondered if he ever crossed her mind at all yet. He wondered if she was happy or sad. He wondered if she was smiling or crying. He wondered and that was it. He couldn’t go up and knock on her door and hold her. He couldn’t go up to her flat and tell her that he was still in love with her or that he shouldn’t have let go.

But he knew that he had to tell her that he was sorry. He was sorry for taking her away from Mino. He was sorry for kissing her. He was sorry for holding her. He was sorry for making love to her. He was sorry for taking her heart and breaking it. He was sorry for loving her.

Taehyun looked back at the rings and grabbed the simple silver band. He looked through the hole before slipping it onto his finger. He held the diamond ring between his thumb and forefinger before slipping it into the small, open box. 

***

A/N: 

Different Updating System

I will only update if there is one new comment

(in total NOT from each reader) after each new chapter post

(I don't mean every day).

The comment can be any comment (examples: ".", "I liked it.", "I hated it.", etc.).

I am only doing this to know that there is at least ONE reader that is truly interested in this story.

Thank you.