Her eyes fluttered open at the sound of someone knocking on her door. She looked behind her and saw that Taehyun was still in her bed so she knew that it couldn’t have been him waiting for her. Her mind went through a short list of people who knew where she lived and she stiffened when she remembered that Mino was one of them. She quickly gathered herself and stood in front of the door, mentally preparing herself. Her hand shook as she reached for the door knob. When the door swung open, Hyewon came face-to-face with Mino. Her heart stopped beating as it grew heavier and heavier. The way he looked at her made her want to crawl into a dark hole and stay there until she died. She bit her bottom lip as Mino stared at her with a crestfallen expression, “What are you doing here so early?” Mino didn’t bother to answer her, “Can I come in?” Hyewon was reluctant but she stepped to the side, praying that he wouldn’t go into her bedroom. She prayed that Taehyun wouldn’t wake up and come out into the living room. Mino looked down at the floor and tried to hold back his tears, “Is Taehyun here?”

Hyewon could have sworn that she had died and come back to life in that one silent minute, “No, why-” Mino spun around and looked at her with his stubborn tears rolling down his face, “I went to his place and he wasn’t there. I figured he would be here like he was a few weeks ago. I just needed to talk to him. Is he in your bedroom? Is he still sleeping?” Hyewon couldn’t breathe. All she could do was think about the how they had been caught, how they had hurt Mino in a way that they could only imagine. She watched him walk to her bedroom, lifeless and tired. She followed him and tried to hold him back but he was stronger than her. Mino froze at the sight of his best friend in his girlfriend’s bed, the bed itself messy. He could ear Hyewon calling his name but he didn’t respond. He was unsure of what he was supposed to say, unsure of how he was supposed to react.

He turned around and stared at Hyewon who just stood nervously in the doorway, “Do you love him? Do you want to end whatever it was that we had? I don’t know what to call it. Was it love? Was it just a game?” Hyewon fiddled with her fingers as she tried to think of something to tell him. Mino approached her and took her hands in his, “I loved you so much. I still do. I don’t get it. You and Taehyun hurt me so much that I can’t even describe the pain and yet I still love you. I wouldn’t have hurt as much if you had just ended things with me first. I wouldn’t have minded that you chose Taehyun. I would have let you go because just thinking about how happy you would be would make things so much better. It isn’t too late, just tell me what you want and I’ll do as you say.” Hyewon didn’t understand why she was crying until she heard the last sentence. She was crying because she was sorry, because she felt sorry for him.

“I’m sorry, Mino. I love you, I do. I just don’t know. I don’t know.” Mino nodded as he let go of her hands. He walked back to the door but stopped. Without looking back, he revealed why he was more hurt than he should have been, “My mom passed away a few days ago and my little sister ran away from home. I would have liked to have one thing going right for me.” Hyewon’s legs gave out and she collapsed to the floor. Black waves of guilt and shame crashed over her over and over again. She couldn’t breathe as the cold and harsh waves crushed her ribs and pushed on her lungs.

III

After that day, Hyewon cut off ties with Taehyun and Mino. She stayed home when she wasn’t at school. She fell into a dark place and no one could bring her out. It was a rainy day and her home was cold. Her large sweater kept her a little warm and her hot coffee grew cold. She sat in her little black fort, thinking about Taehyun. She sat there, her arms hugging her legs. And then, she thought about Mino. How sweet he was. How gentle and kind. She remembered how selfless and innocent he was. And healing scars were opened once more. She couldn’t forgive herself for hurting such a great man. She thought that Taehyun had moved on. She didn’t know that he was still thinking of her and how he still wanted a better future with her. She thought Mino had forgotten about her. She didn’t know that he still thought about her every single day and how he still saw her as the best thing he ever had. She didn’t know that she was not the only one hurting.

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The End. 

Thank you for reading.