I'm eternally grateful for the moment I met you. You finally spared a second to listen to me rapping the hell I went through. Just so you know, I never regret looking up to you.
You're one of the reasons I got multiple piercings. Heck, when most males looked scary with piercings on their cartilages, how could you stay classy? As a female, I was offended. So I went to the tattoo parlor and got needles through my ears. That was the first time you laughed at me. But when people drifted away because they couldn't bear my madness, you chose to stay. You were sitting there, selflessly, listening to my rants when I had a fight with my mom because I dyed my hair gold and purple. The next day, you showed up with a bright pink hair and a bright smile turning your eyes into cute crescents.
You saved me from myself. I never regret falling for you.
You listen to my mixtapes and help me find the right flow to put in. You're the blood running through my veins. You're the rhyme of my last dime.
Whenever I try to be cheesy, you'll sass me off like the diva you are. "You call yourself a rapper but that's how limited your vocabularies are?" you snort. I'll get annoyed and I'll catch you in a headlock. I'll try to cut off your breath but to no avail, you're the one keeping me breathless whenever I see you smile and giggle to my tickles. Despite your badass façade, you whisper those typical sweet nothings to my ear. I'll be embarrassed, burying my face in the crook of your neck to hide the crimson on my cheeks, and you'll hold my hand, keeping me around you like a wrapper. I don't mind being a wrapper to a gift called you. You're my favorite rapper and forever the beat of my heart.
It's kinda heartfelt when you often slip into my typical 'Dear God' tagline and you use that 'Sweat Pea' back at me. Sweat Pea, that's the pet name I reserved for you.
I wish we'd grow together like peas in a pod -sticking together- and once we're old, we'd reminiscence our youth. How I wasted my college breaks, how you unconventionally collected so many beanies and snapbacks, and how you let me wear your earrings because I thought I looked better with them.
You'll forever be my sugar. You've erased my bitter past and you've accepted my sour personality traits. You never look down on me because you've been in the industry way longer than I have, but kiss me and back me up instead. When the society judge me, you look at me with so much admiration in your eyes. How does such an imperfectly perfect guy exist in my world?
I promise to myself I'll keep writing lyrics as meaningful as I can. I'll learn to compose on my own. I'll dedicate a track for you. Maybe I'll even meet Drake in the future and maybe pester him to work on a track with me or for better, I'll get Usher to sing the song you produced. I promise someday when people get to listen to my songs, when they listen to me rapping out my feelings, I'll make you proud calling me your wife. I'm grateful to be blessed with a beautiful, wonderful, carefree, supportive lover like you. They think you're harsh because you never sugarcoat things even to me, but I love you just like that.
You're forever my sugar, Sweet Pea.
*The raw feeling is very personal bcs I'm a female rapper myself and the society is judging me a lot for that. For cursing out of honesty, for having many ear piercings, for being my bold self. I had an ex who was so into music and he unconditionally accepted me for who I was. Even though we didn't make it, I'm forever grateful I had him.
Btw I blame BTS' Suga for the fiction guy. He's one of the rappers I look up to the most. He's this blunt yet witty guy who rocks any hair color, caps, beanies, and piercings. Heck, he's a hard worker and his raps are awesome as . Not that I wanna marry or own or date Suga (not at all!), but he reminds me of that certain someone a lot. So, well, I'll leave it to you guys to visualize him as the guy.