Love is tricky; at some point you accept. I don't want to say settle. But in a way you do. You are accepting this imperfect human being. Who will irritate you sometimes. Disappoint you. Who you won't like every damn day. But who you love. Who you choose over and over again.

-- Jeremiah Brent

It had officially been three months since the night they broke-up. In that time, they had reshuffled room assignments so that he and Jinwoo could be spared from seeing each other all the time. Seungyoon had sat down with them separately to check in on them and dish out some sage love advice. But more importantly, their ever reliable leader made sure that this would not impact the band nor the work.

He was suprised and embarassed to know from Seunghoon that he was there that fateful evening. There was just so much emotions and tension that night that he had not noticed the dancer entering their apartment. His hyung, to his relief and surprise, did not probe his feelings nor asked him to explain himself. He was usually one to impart some words of wisdom. But this time around, he had only asked him to do one thing.

"Take note of what you miss about him. Like type it or write it down" he instructed.

"Hyung, how is that suppose to help me move on?" Mino questioned.

"Just do it for the first few months especially when you start dating again" he continued. "Just trust me"

"Is this some scheme to get us back together?" he asked suspiciously.

"No, it's bigger and more important than that. You'll figure it out - trust me"

--

And so he did. After fulfilling the 3-month rule, he had begun casually dating a string of people friends had introduced or he met through clubs. And found himself writing the most mundane and suprising things.

Date #1: Cafe with that dancer

Didn't laugh at my jokes AT ALL. Jinwoo always thought I was funny.

Date #2: Stylist at the art exhibit

Kept talking non-stop. Wouldn't let me enjoy the damn exhibit. Hyung wouldn't have been interested either but would have given me the time and space to look around. He probably would have waited for me without complains while playing games on his phone.

Date #3: Private club with kpop idol

Tried to touch my thigh and I flinched. I realized you were the only person I allowed to do that.

And laughed like a hyena. You always had a high pitch laugh but it was adorable. 

Date #4: Yi-soo at this resto

Well well well. I like this one.

Date #5: Yi-soo in Itaewon

We talked non-stop on the phone. Seeing each other again tomorrow.

Date #7: Yi-soo where we had our first date

Been dating for a month. This is it! Those feelings I missed are back!

Date #11: Yi-soo at the park

I wonder hyung. What if these feelings disappear just like it did with you?

Date #12: Y @ Amusement Park

Yi-soo kept knitpicking everything today from my clothes to the way I chew. Why won't you just date someone else for crying out loud? Or just make yourself that imaginary boyfriend of yours? Damn it.

Date #16: At Y's apartment

I couldn't relax with Y.

I miss doing absolutely nothing with you. I miss the days on our couch not having to talk or entertain one another. Just being together in one room. Not worrying about what the other thought. Just being ourselves.

Date #17: At Y's apartment

Y tried to kiss me and I couldn't.

I kept thinking of you.

Date #18: At Y's apartment

If love requried this much effort, I'd rather work at it with you.

--

Mino looked at the last log he had written on his phone for the past months. He had just parted ways with Yi-soo, saying as kindly as he could that he didn't want to continue dating anymore. It wasn't fair to string the person along when he was clearly missing and thinking of someone else. And as bad as it may sound, Yi-soo's tears did not move him as much as Jinwoo's cold face the night they broke up. That had personally crushed him.

Back then, he thought love had waned because he had chosen the wrong person. In the movies, the romance never seemed to fade. That's what you get when you base love on fiction. Now, he realized that it had ended because he expected love to be easy. That he would always feel like being with and doing things for Jinwoo.

But the truth was, whoever said that "True love feels easy. It flows and everything comes naturally" was an ignorant fool who probably never had a real relationship. Nothing important is ever created without effort. Intention. 

Talent. A career. A house. Wealth. A well-defined body. Everything important always required constant hard work. It was a deliberate choice. Why did he even think a relationship was an exception?

Jinwoo certainly had flaws that irked him. And his hyung really needed to develop emotional resilience. Almost six months after, he still didn't regret telling him so that night. But he did regret not speaking the truth sooner and handling things better.

There were definitely no formulas or singular way of going about relationships to guarantee its success. Each story unfolds differently, imperfectly. But what he knew for certain was if he had to go through the intricacies, pitfalls and complications of love, he wanted no one else but Jinwoo by his side.

Author's note: intentionally used a uni Korean name (Yi-soo) and made Yi-soo's gender open for the reader's interpreation