I get ready and leave the house for college.
I pass my noon time of the day at the college.
Class ends. I leave the college and start walking towards the bus station.

I reach the bus station and wait for the bus. It's so hot and sunny... that too it's afternoon time. Oh god.
A bus comes after 5-7 minutes of waiting.

I get on the bus. Oh god... so crowded! And of course, no seat...

I get a seat after about 5 minutes.
I look outside of the widow of the bus, enjoying the breeze. From the window, I see a couple on the side of the road, eating ice cream and chuckling. They look happy together. I feel strange looking at them... like a lonely feeling.

A memory suddenly pops up into my mind...

 

 

--FLASHBACK--

 

My phone rings.

I check and It's Roshan, my boyfriend. We met at an institute where I go for computer training. It's been 3 months now we are in a relationship. He's really cute and attractive and he's really sweet. I love him.
I pick up the call.

"Hey Priya"

"I was missing you" I say with a smile.

"Aww I miss you too. What are you doing now?"

"Just sitting. Done teaching the kids. You?"

"Oh... I'm watching some videos on YouTube. By The way, I was wondering... Does Riya watch romance movies?"
I get a slight shock with that question. Why is he curious about Riya watching romance movies?

"I don't know... but why are you asking suddenly?"

"Just like that. Do you chat with her everyday?"

"No... Why?"

"Oh just asking."

"And does she tell anything about me to you?"
Suspicion rings my mind. Why is he asking like that? Why is he asking so much about her?

"No... but why??"

"I'm just asking as she's our friend."

"oh..." I say, with the suspicion reduced by half.

"Okay, I will go have dinner now. I'll call you again tomorrow. I love you." He says.

"I love you too, Roshan."

"bye"

"bye" I say and I hang up.

That half suspicion that still remained revolves around my mind... I've noticed a lot of changes in him lately. He did not ask about Riya before, but now he often asks about her. 
Could it be that he's developing interest towards her?
Also that he talks y stuff these days...
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe he's just ed...

I go to the computer training institute next day. I enter the class and I see Riya.
I go and sit next to her.

Me and her study in the same class at same timings. She's older than me... she's married, with a 4 year old daughter. She's like my older sister. 
There are about 5 students in the class including us.

Sir starts to teach after few minutes. He's gonna teach MS Word today.

"Okay now you all know how to work in Word. So I want you all to type a paragraph now and show me."

I start typing.
I turn towards Riya's screen after few seconds.

*I Love you, Ron.* 
I see on her screen.
...Ron? Ron is Roshan's nickname! Is she- 
no no no, I maybe wrong.

"Who's Ron, unnie?" I ask her.

"He's... someone, you know... or you don't know" She says while looking at me from side with a smirk.

WHAT THE ....! So my suspicion was right! These two have been secretly conspiring me like this?!

"Oh..." I say and I turn back to the computer. Hurtful and painful emotions rushes inside me... as if my head and heart... no, as if my entire body is being hammered.

"Ooooh someone is jealous~" she says with a teasing tone.

"What...?" I say to her giving her a 'eww' kind of look and then I resume working.

I leave the room after I finish my work, without saying anything to her.

I reach home. I go to my room and sit in a corner of my bed and start to be in the hurt all by myself. 
Roshan... I loved him so much... honestly and loyally. And he betrayed me like this. 
How can he do this?! That woman is an ajumma with a 4 year old daughter! What a characterless !! And that ... I thought of her as my older sister, who cares for me... and someone whom I can trust and lean on to and someone's who's got my back... How could I have been so wrong and delusional?
My eyes start to get teary.
I see mom coming inside my room to give me tea and some biscuits. 
I try to suppress my tears in.
Mom keeps the plate on my table and walks towards my room's door.

"Ma...?" My voice shivers.
Mom stops and turns back.
"Priya? Why are are you crying???" She says as she looks at me.
I had told her about Roshan and my feelings towards him. I tell her everything that happened today, as I cry a river out.

The next day I enter the classroom but I don't look at Riya. I see her from the corner of my eye and she looking at my face. I pass by her and sit in front of a computer which is three to four computers away from her. She doesn't say anything.

Roshan seems to be on leave today.
I leave the room after I finish my work and I start walking down the stairs and I see Riya standing there.

"Hey why are you trying to avoid me since yesterday?" she asks.

"I just thought you were like an older sister to me. A sister to whom I can lean my shoulder on... A sister who has got my back. But I was so wrong." I say and I pass by her, walking down the stairs.

I go to the class next day as usual... and I don't look at Riya or talk to her. I sit in front of a computer that's far away from her.
3 days pass the same way.
 

(5 days later)

It's already been 5 days, I don't see Roahan in the class anymore. He didn't contact me either... ever since I came to know about the affair.
I privately ask sir about him while leaving.
"He has left the institute." He replies.
He left the class. 
What??!! That  left the institute?! So he ran away like this after what happened??!
It's good that I don't have to see his face anymore but such a coward he is that he escaped like this.

I go to the class next day and I see that Riya is absent. I don't bother.

 

( 8 days later)

I come to know from sir that she left the institute too. Wow, what a relief. I don't have to deal with her anymore.... I don't have to bear ignoring her anymore. She is out of my life.
But as for Roshan, I'm sure he's gonna contact me after few months. Let's wait. I want to bash him as !
 

-- --

 

 

I get down from the bus and start walking towards my home.

I feel like I'm still dwelling in the flashback... and then I remember another incident with another guy.


 

 

 

--FLASHBACK--

 

[ I don't love you. You are ugly.] He texts.

Anger gushes inside me. I type a text, venting out my anger on him but when I press the enter key, I find out that he blocked me.

 

-- --

 

 

I reach my home and I think as I remove my shoes to get in...

I am surely over these incidents now, but it feels like my love... is wounded. It's wounded to be given to anyone. Even though I love Hobie oppa... I don't feel like I am ready to have a relationship with him at this point. I just have feelings for him... in my heart.