Lay’s POV

I play with the knife in my room and just stare at it.

“Maybe I should see if I can heal flesh wounds then maybe I can try to heal her a bit more.”

I take the knife but stop myself realizing that I have no bandages in my room. I get up and walk to the first aid kit that we keep in the house and pull out a thing of bandages.

When I get back to my room I stare at the blade shocked that I’m thinking this.

“I can’t do this,” I say more to myself then if anyone was here, “What if I mess up? What if I can’t heal myself?”

I stare at the flowers in my windowsill that I’ve stopped from dying for the last six or eight years.

“If I can keep those alive for this long maybe I can heal her. I want to stop her pain. I want to be with her so she’s smiling.

I take the blade and cut the top part of my forearm careful of any veins. I wince as the blade pierces my skin. I stare at myself and feel the pain. Stop being a chicken Yixing she’s going through far more pain if we can’t figure out if we can truly help her.

I take the blade and go down a bit harder.

I start to heal the ash that I made. I feel the every bit of it slowly stitching itself back together until the front door opens and my mom calls out my name.

I grab the bandages, wrap up my arm, and slip on a long sleeved black shirt. I throw the leftover bandages onto my nightstand.

“Yixing are you hungry?” my mother asks as she opens up the door to my room.

“No mom I’m tired so I think I’ll just sleep for a bit.”

“Alright if you say so,” she answers as she heads down stairs.

I sigh as I slip the knife into my nightstand.

I lie down and close my eyes kind of tired for some reason.

I’m lying on my bed and I shoot up when I hear the sound that means that Kai had just teleported into my house.

I groan and dig my head into my pillow.  

“Hey open this door,” Kai shouts into my room.

I simply try to disappear into my pillow even more.

I hear my door knob start moving and sigh, “Great he brought Luhan with him.”

I simply roll over and pull myself into a sitting position and watch as my door opens and in storms in an angry Luhan and a smirking Kai.

“What gives me the honor of you two practically breaking and entering into my home?”

Kai shrugs and points at Luhan, “I don’t he called me and asked me to get him here.”

Luhan nods and sits down on one of my desks, “I think you already know but Mei is sick again.”

I roll my eyes, “Yes I do.”

Luhan looks more towards me and sees some bandages and such sitting next to my bed.

“Yixing what where you doing before we got here?”

“Nothing,” I state glad that my tone is even, “I was trying to get some rest if you need to know.”

Lair. Luhan grabs a hold of my arms and I don’t wince. Still it takes all my strength not to.

He goes to pull up my sleeves when Kai grabs a hold of him and pulls him back, “Luhan stop it.”

Luhan goes to pull up my sleeves but stops when my mother calls upstairs to see if I was alright.

He lets me go and glares at me.

Luhan’s POV

The way the bandages were rolled up I can tell that there’s blood on them. Lay must be cutting himself to see if he can heal it.

I don’t want to be right. I don’t want my friend to be hurting himself to see he can at least heal flesh wounds.

It scares me to think that he would be.