Reality and Fantasy

Take Your Time

When the four oldest members of the group were up they quietly discussed what had occured, showing Hoseok and Yoongi the articles.  They were both livid as well.  

"What are we going to do?" Hoseok asked.

Yoongi just shook his head.

"I'm not sure what we can do," Namjoon said honestly.  "I can understand where some of this is coming from.  I personally do not approve of the hate but...I can understand it.  Another huge part of it is jealousy.  Some of our fans expect us to stay single.  That obviously isn't possible.  Somangah was right.  Something had to be said."

"What?" Jin asked, looking at Namjoon.

"I don't think a social media post will be strong enough," Hoseok said. 

"We need a verbal statement," Yoongi said.  "But it needs to be thought out.  Not automatic retaliation."

"We need to let our fans know that while they will always hold a special place in our hearts, we are coming to an age when our souls long for companionship that friends, and family, and fans, cannot provide.  Our hearts long for love.  The kind of love that burns within us and connects us to another.  And that the kind of love that fills my soul will inevitably not be the same kind of love that fills Yoongi hyungs, or Jin hyungs, or anyone else except for the one my heart sings for."

"I agree," Hoseok said.  "And I think that you should be the one to give it.  As our leader and...as someone who has found that love you would be one of the most qualified members to speak on it."

"We need to take the pressure off of our dongsaengs," Yoongi said.

"How?" Namjoon asked.

"The fans may think Tae-Taeah and Kookie will cave to pressure, or that this is just a publicity stunt, or...maybe we can pass it off as a misunderstanding but...we would all know that that is a lie and when the truth finally does come out it will make things even worse for everyone involved," Yoongi said.  "In the meantime I have no intentions of giving in.  If the fans don't like it, then I'm sorry.  I'm just not someone who can be alone any longer.  I'm not that strong.  I will apologize for being lacking, but I will not apologize for finding love.  And...if I have offended you..."

"You haven't," Namjoon said immediately.  "So don't yield.  Zephyr noona is amazing."

"We're all really happy you have her," Hoseok agreed.

"I think I'll go to the office with you Joonah," Yoongi said.  "Bang PD-nim should probably be told.  And...he'll probably want to meet..."

The three men just nodded.

"What about Somang-ssi?" Jin asked.

"What about her?" Namjoon asked in confusion.

"Are you really that serious about her?" Jin asked.

"I am," Namjoon said, showing his own couples ring.

"You might want to bring her too," Yoongi said.  "Bang PD-nim will do his very best to protect us. but he needs to know all the facts."

"Leave in half an hour?" Namjoon asked.

"Meet you at my car?" Yoongi asked.

"JIn hyung and I will take care of the maknae-deul," Hoseok said.

With a knowing look shared between them all the four got up and set their plan in motion, Yoongi going to get Zephyr up and Namjoon going to find Somang.

_________________________________________________

"Hey, Babygirl," he said softly as he walked into his room.

"Is everything okay?" she asked, sounding and looking concerned.

Namjoon just shook his head as he sat down.

"Things have gotten out of hand," he said, taking her hand in his and rubbing the back of it lightly with his thumb.  "Yoongi hyung and I are going in early to talk with our staffs about this morning.  This kind of attitude isn't something we can tolerate.  Not towards anyone, and it needs to be stopped.  The hyungs think we need to release some kind of verbal statement about it and...I think Yoongi hyung is going to announce his relationship so..."

"Is there anything I can do?" Somang asked, looking at the man before her.

"Love me," Joon said sounding sad.  "When I am hateful, and say things I probably shouldn't..love me.  And when I am lacking as a person, or a companion, or a leader...love me.  When I am at my weakest, or most vunerable...love me.  And I will do the same for you.  And...promise me when things get hard as I know they will...that you will love me harder, because in times like that I will fight for you above all.  You're a part of this family now, and we protect our own.  Just remember that.  No matter when or where, you can depend on me, and you can depend on the others.  Their love for me will spread to love for you."

"Joonah?" Somang asked, worry blossoming in her chest.

Joon just smiled and let out a soft laugh.

"A leader must make concessions and filter the blame to them when these things happen.  I have been wreckless, and lacking.  I was focused on too many things at once and didn't pay attention to the right details, and now I must admit my weaknesses and my faults.  But in order to say the things I am about to say I must first be able to prove that I am worthy to have such opinions.  To defend the love of another I must first know love myself.  But if you are not ready to tell the world that you are my person..."

Somang held her breath as she processed his words and began to understand the implications of it all.

"You..."

Somang shook her head.

"You aren't afraid?"

"Terrified," Namjoon said.  "But it is a leap of faith I am willing to take, if you will take it with me.  The hyungs and I already know the risks of this blowing up in our faces and we think it is a risk we need to take for our team.  We are prepared for the outcome and we know the others will agree with us once they know what it going on but...Taehyungah and Kookie don't deserve this.  As their hyung I will do everything in my power to lessen the blow.  As will Yoongi hyung, and Seokjin hyung and Hoseok hyung.  I just...don't want you to feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do..."

"If...if you tell people...about...us..."

"I don't know if it will help or not, but in the long run it can not hurt.  Hopefully it will show the world that as our songs mature, and as our image matures, so do we.  And finding someone to spend your life with is a part of growing up.  A right of passage if you will.  For most of us it is time to try.  Some of us will have trials and errors.  Some of us fell in love when we were very young.  Some of us may stay single for a while.  Some of us already know who we want to spend the rest of our lives with.  And as responsible idols we should encourage our fans to find that same kind of real love in their own lives, and to make themselves happy as they grow older with us.  Hopefully then we can all be happy together."

"Ok," Somang said.  "What do I need to do?" 

"Get dressed," Namjoon said.  "Yoongi hyung and Zephyr noona are probably already waiting for us."

"I'll be ready in 5," she said as Namjoon left to give her privacy.

Thirty minutes later they were pulling into the underground garage at BigHit and parking close to the elevators, getting out and grouping for a moment before Yoongi took Zephyrs hand and Namjoon took Somang.

"No one here bites," Joon said, trying to ease Somangs nerves.

As soon as they walked in however they were bombarded by managers and various other staffs firing off one question after another about the articles, and the truth behind it, and the girls.  Ignoring it all they went straight to their mentors office and knocked, immediately being instructed to enter.  Taking a deep breath and looking at eachother Yoongi and Joon gave their partners reassuring looks before opening the door and walking in.

Bang PD-nim looked friendly enough but he looked tired.

"I'm sorry, PD-nim," Namjoon said, bowing his head and sounding deeply regretful.  "I will do whatever you tell me to to fix this."

"I'm sorry too, PD-nim," Yoogi said, bowing his head and sounding unusually meek.  "I should have been more considerate of what was happening."

Bang PD was silent for several long minutes.

"Sit," he said finally, gesturing towards the two chairs and bench in his office.

The girls immediately took the bench while the boys took the chairs, their heads still bowed.

"How do you plan on fixing this?" he asked.  "Joonah?  Yoongiah?"

The two boys looked at eachother, not entirely sure on how to answer.

"I..." Joon started.

"I already know about Taehyungah," Bang PD said.  "He has already spoken to me about it.  As has Jungkookah.  I warned them both last year that this would happen eventually and advised them against their...plans.  There is nothing anyone can say to change the publics opinion.  Those kinds of relationships are still frowned upon everywhere."

"But the fact that they have both found love should not be," Yoongi said.  "We can't stay single forever."

"Then what do you suggest?" Bang PD asked, sitting back and steepling his fingers.

"Admit our faults," Namjoon said.  "That underneath it all we are just seven men looking for acceptance and love for the people we really are.  And that maybe...some of us have already found that?"

"And what do you think that will solve?" 

"We don't know," Yoongi said.  "Perhaps it will help those fans with false hopes to move on with their lives and to grow with us as human beings so that one day we might all be happy together?"

"And if it backfires even worse?"

"Then we will find out who our true fans are," Namjoon said.

"And if your popularity suffers?" Bang PD-nim asked.

"Then we will reflect on how we were lacking and work harder to be more admirable idols in the future," Namjoon said with confidence.

"Sir," Yoongi said softly.  "I'm 25.  I know I have less than five years before I must fulfill my duty to my country.  I'll be almost 33 if I wait til the very last moment.  I don't want to wait that long to start my life.  I know I am lacking.  I apologize.  But...I've found someone now who accepts me despite my flaws and...I don't think I can let her walk away but...I cannot in good conscious ask her to wait for me forever, because she would."

"Namjoon?" Bang PD asked.

"Yes, Sir?" 

"What are your thoughts?" he asked.

"On?"

"This," Bang PD said opening his arms wide.

"Taehyungah and Jungkookah make eachother happy.  They have accepted eachother and as their family, we should accept them as well.  Zephyr noona and Yoongi hyung have walked through the darkest things life can bring upon us and survived.  A love like that is exceptionally rare.  And I know that their love for one another is pure.  It predates us," he said, referring to the group.  "It is only right that he is allowed a small piece of happiness after all of the happiness and hope he has brought to the world.  He has given so much of himself and asked for so little in return."

"And you?" Bang PD asked.

"If I am worthy of love then...I hope that I am afforded the opportunity to nuture it and watch it grow.  I think it will only make me a better person and a stronger leader and I hope that our fans can accept the fact that my heart has found a home in the love of another.  I know that such an announcement could be considered burdensome but we have kept silent in fear for so long now it is better to rip all of the bandaids off at once, quickly, than it is to do so one at a time over several weeks."

Their mentor nodded as he considered everything he had been told.

"We had already started damage control before you came, but I am glad that you two decided to stand up and do the right thing.  I assume no one else knows?"

"Hoseok hyung and Jin hyung stayed with the maknae-deul," Namjoon said.  "I asked them to hide the phones and unplug the internet until we get this sorted."

"Wise decision," Bang PD said as his eyes traveled to the girls.  "I see we need to have dinner together sometime?"

The two boys just nodded.

"Go to the conference room and I will have the staffs gather to coordinate some press."

The two boys stood and bowed deeply before signaling to Zephyr and Somang who bowed as well and then departing for the conference room.

________________________________________________________

An hour later the staffs had prepared a statement on 'TaeKook', and had prepared an annoucement on Yoogi's engagement to his girlfriend of 7 years in which he apologized for keeping his relationship from his fans citing worries of hurting his fans, s, and his company, and asking for forgiveness and understanding as he began a new chapter in his life, finally expressing his hope that his fans find happiness and love for themselves so that BTS and ARMY could continue to be a family filled with love.  

Once those were loaded into their various social media accounts and prepped for release Namjoon sat in front of a white screen, the camera soley on him as a staffmember stood to the side, a list of prepared questions in her hand.  All BTS accounts went live as Namjoon took a breath, and the fallout (or lack thereof) began.

Introducing himself as Kim Namjoon, he went on to explain his role in the group of BTS, what the group was about, and what they had been through in the past year.  He thanked fans for their continued support and understanding for all of the years they had been active and wished their fans well in life, and love before moving on to more serious topics.  Becoming solemn he expressed his disappointment in netizens for so eagerly attacking such young and beautiful souls without having any solid facts and only speculation.  He went on to say that regardless of what their relationship status was he would respect whatever decision they made and would neither confirm nor deny anything until the two of them came forward together, at which time he would support them whatever their decision may be and encouraged those listening to do the same if they could find it in their hearts to do so.  He also explained that while he was in no position to discuss their personal lives without their permission, as their leader and their friend he had had the priviledge of watching the both of them grow into amazing young men while never forgetting their humble beginnings.  He thanked Taehyung for his determination and uncanny ability to brighten everyones day while thanking Jungkook for coming to BigHit and for having an unending amount of faith in him as a rapper, a person, and a leader.  

He then thanked Jimin for the role that he had played all these years in the group while thanking his hyungs for always listening to him and guiding him well.

He briefly addressed Yoongi's recent engagement, congratulating his hyung on finally finding something to make him happy, and for finding something to inspire more amazing music.  He assured fans that Yoongis fiancee was truly an amazing person, and that he had never seen this side of Suga before but that seeing him like he was now made everyones heart happy.  

He finally took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he gathered his thoughts.  It seemed to him like he would not need the questions after all.

"Being a member of an idol band is lonelier than you could ever imagine.  The only people who can even begin to understand what you are going through are the people in your group with you.  That is why it is so imperative for everyone to get along and why such strong bonds are often formed.  Skinships and ships become a thing because it isn't that hard to imagine those people being together as more than friends.  No one in Bangtan Sonyeondan is just friends.  We are brothers.  Through our experiences we have been bonded for life.  When one of us is hurting, we are all hurting.  While some of us are closer with one member than we are another, it doesn't mean we love anyone any less.  TaeTaeah and Kookie are thick as thieves but Suga hyung loves his youngest hyungs in his own way and they love him just the same.  Hoseok hyung and Yoogi hyung are literally soulmates, but no one understands me better I think than Min Yoongi.  So our relationships in the group run.  They were formed out of necessity to survive.  Because in the dead of night when the schedules are over, all we have is eachother.  I cannot even imagine being an idol without a group.  Those are probably the loneliest people of all, especially when our fans unrealistically expectations for us to stay single.  It just isn't possible.  And so when we do find someone we push them away for fear of getting hurt, wether it be us, them, or our fans, we are so terrified of letting someone down that we shut ourselves down and become miserable human beings."

"We come on tv, or go on stage, and put on a mask and ask our fans to stay happy, and healthy, and whole, and it is a burdensome double standard to ask because we ourselves cannot do the same, because no matter how hard we try, we can never seem to get our hearts full.  We are very lacking people when we come to you for support and you our fans are so selfless in giving it to us without question.."

Namjoon stopped again to breathe, looking at his hands before a small smile came to his face and he looked back up.

"A very wise person once said to me that our true fans would understand when the time came for us to fall in love and that they would remain by our sides no matter what.  To those fans I will never be able to express the full extent of my appreciation and love.  Thank you."

"That same wise person also told me that we cannot be alone for the rest of our lives, and that is true.  We can not sit here in an effort to outwait eachother in finding happiness.  It is not fair of us to ask our fans to belong only to us, and it is equally not fair of our fans to do the same.  Selfishness is human nature, but we as human beings must continue to push past that desire so that we grow in to better people.  Let us not lose out on a lifetime because we are fighting to preserve one fleeting moment.  There will come a day when we will all have to move on from where we are now.  When an idol will have to choose between placating every last fan they have, and finding happiness, true happiness, for themselves, and it is sad that such a choice causes so much turmoil and pain for everyone involved.  This is, however, unavoidable.  The fans who truly love us for all of the reasons that they should will be happy for us and will accept whomever it is we choose to love, as long as they are good to us and love us as we deserve.  And each and every one of us should live happily in all aspects and...search diligently for the one who will love us when the ocean before us goes black, because one day it will.  And when we find that person...we should never let them go.  It is said we each have one soulmate in life, and once you have found them, if you do let that person go...you might not ever find them again.  When you realize what you had and lost...then your life will be one filled with regret, and for what?  That is not the life to have."

"We, Bangtan Sonyeondan, know, that we owe our incredible ARMY, our life.  Through you, our beautiful and amazing fans, we have realized dreams we never knew we had until you made them possible.  You all work endlessly for us so that we can live without regret...  So that our families can live with honor.  I could never bear hurting you or disrespecting your opinions and efforts.  But I have decided to live happily in all aspects of my life, and to stop denying myself the one thing I want the most.  Fame and money is nice but...it isn't what my heart desires.  I know what it is and...I hope that I am lucky enough to have found it.  More than anything I want someone by my side.  Someone who can love the man behind this mask that I wear.  Someone who can accept me, flaws and all.  Someone who understands my heart and mind...who will be there for me when I stand in front of a beautiful sea of lights, and someone who will love me when that sea goes dark and all I have to offer is myself.  And...in return for their affection, I swear to them that I will never let them go.  Not until they tell me to.  I think that, like Yoongi hyung, I have found that person to give my heart to, and while I have not decided if this is my happily ever after, I sincerely hope that my fans, our fans, will continue to support us and love us, while we branch out into new projects and grow in both our professional and personal lives.  And to you, our ARMY, I promise that we will continue to grow, and to show you a better us, in the hopes that years from now we are still on this beautiful journey together."

Taking another breath, Namjoon stood and bowed deeply to the camera before it shut off and the world went wild.  

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