[CONTENTID1]32.[/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2]Seoul, 2018[/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID3]

You were everything 

I ever wanted

And everything

I knew I could not have.

-s.l. gray-

[/CONTENTID3]

[CONTENTID4]

Playlist:

Taeyeon - Can’t Control Myself

 Taeyeon - Fine

Taeyeon - 11:11

***

Kim Taeyeon doesn’t have many things she wants in her life.

But once she wants something, it never comes easy to her. Taeyeon always works so hard to achieve everything she has in her life now. She was okay with it. Until a girl named Lee Jihye entered her life. 

Lee Jihye was a really cute and lovable girl. She was ten when Taeyeon first met her.  Jihye was so talented that Lee Sooman himself became interested in her talent. Taeyeon trained with her a few times and Jihye never failed to amaze her. Her movements were fluid and sharp, her voice was very clear and strong; a perfect candidate for a future star. They were very close like sisters to the point where Jihye always stuck with her everywhere she went in the building. 

As a top trainee, Jihye had many people who wanted to be close to her. She smiled a lot and was very bubbly. Everywhere she went, Jihye was always the one who shined the most. A true star. Taeyeon once dreamt of being on one stage with Jihye. A beautiful dream she once had.

But everything changed not long after that.

Taeyeon's dream of being a solois even greater than her idol, Boa, was shattered when SM announced that she was going to debut as the leader of SM’s new girl group, SNSD. Her dream was easily handed out to the one and only Lee Jihye. 

It’s fine.

She thought. 

But she accidentally heard the higher up said that Samsung Group was willing to invest in SM in large amounts if their daughter debuted as a soloist instead in a group. SM wasn’t willing to debut many soloists because it was a risky move. People prefer idol groups rather than soloists. So in short, her position was easily taken from her by a girl from a rich family.

Her hard work for years was easily taken by paying some sum of money.

It was unfair.

She didn’t want to see her but then that girl appeared in front of Taeyeon with a bright innocent smile. Taeyeon was going to go to the building’s rooftop through the emergency stairs when she met the very girl who just robbed her dream and hard work. With a bright smile, Jihye congratulated her. She said that Taeyeon would be a great leader. 

She felt mocked by her. 

And it happened so fast. 

When she was blinded by anger. She pushed Jihye’s small body away from her. The little girl easily fell hard through the stairs.

What was she thinking back then? Did she really wish that Jihye would die?  Or she just didn’t want her to be near her? 

Taeyeon can’t remember. 

What she clearly remembered was that her anger turned to fear in an instant as she fled from the scene. And for the whole night, she repeated in her head that Jihye deserved it. Taeyeon did nothing wrong. Lee Jihye deserved it. 

Days soon turned into months and months to year. She forgot about her and enjoyed her time as a part of SNSD. She was happy. And that happiness increased when she met a new trainee named Byun Baekhyun. Taeyeon trained him, and she liked him. She was sure that he liked her back. Baekhyun was literally the man of her dreams. Then, once again, her dream was snatched by the one and only Lee Jihye. 

After so much hardship, Taeyeon managed to get rid of her once again. Lee Jihye disappeared from her life again. She believed that love would grow after time. 

A month,

A year.

He never looks at her.

우리 마지막 / I keep thinking

그 순간이 자꾸 떠올라 / About our last moment

잘 지내란 말이 전부였던 담담한 이별 / The words “take care” was it for our pla