Sweat trickles down my face and my breaths are troubled ragged things that send ripples throughout my body. I had run here, slipping through the oblivious, ignorant people, desperate to see him. To tell him. Because, honestly, the thought of holding it back any longer, of being apart from him any longer, was too painful to even fathom.

We had all been together when Jjong had received the call. Key had been pleased to see me, his face brightening as I had joined him and Jjong in the main room, my hair slick with sweat. I hadn't bothered showering after my run (who knows how miles I had sprinted?) and had collapsed on my bed three hours after leaving the dorm. I know he had been worried, and I suppose he had thought I was better now that I was gracing the two of them with my presence. I hadn't been much company, even I knew that. But I knew that I had to face them at one point, and if I was going to make things right with Taemin, I knew I couldn't anger anyone else. Except Onew. He could go burn in hell for I all cared. 

"Minho!" He had said, his arms outstretched as he saw me stalk around the corner. Jonghyun had looked up from the TV screen, only slightly interested, before turning back to the game. I didn't say anything, just fell into the seat on the opposite side of the room. But I knew that it was enough for them both, it was a step in the right direction.

I had simply watched the two of them play together, laugh together, flirt with one another. Reminded of all of the times Taemin and I had done just that-- the soft punches to the arm, the tossing of the hair, the sweet smiles. All of it.

And so when Jonghyun's phone rang I immediately tensed, drawing myself out of the chair and leaning forward. From what I could piece together from half of the conversation, Onew had dragged Taemin to a bar. A ing bar. And now he was too drunk to even walk. And Taemin had called Jjong to come and fetch him.

As he hung up the phone our eyes met. He probably knew what I was going to do before I even had fully formulated a plan. "Minho--" he started. I knew Key had told him everything; they never could keep secrets from one another. He knew that Onew had left me here to protect the maknae. But he didn't know why.

I had jumped up from the chair as quickly as I could, leaping aside when Jonghyun launched himself across the room. He landed on his knees with a grunt and I remember hearing Key shout in surprise.

"I need to do this, Jonghyun!" I shout behind me, feeling guilty for possibly hurting him. But then again, it was his fault.

This is my chance​, I had thought. I can see him.

So, I had run. Shoving aside anyone who got in my way, awfully aware that the two would soon be chasing after me, trying to stop me from seeing him. Seeing Taemin. And part of me wondered what made them so set on preventing me from doing this. What had Onew told Key, exactly? That I could possibly harm him for doing this? Despite the flares of anger I had felt before and the thoughts of smashing his face in the wall, I know I could never do it. No, not to him-- and if not for my own admiration for our leader, for Tae's. Because I am all too aware of the way he looks up to him, the way he admires his clumsiness, his always present smile, his willingness to help, to protect. And so I, because of his love for his hyung, I would never be able to raise a hand against him. It would hurt Taemin, and in turn, hurt me more than I could possibly say.

But now, standing here, seeing someone else's fingers his brown hair, seeing someone else's mouth pressed up against his soft lips, I-- I don't know what to think. What to do. So, I just stare.

And I know that my mouth is open, and I know what I'm obstructing the door into the restaurant, and I know that the waitress is coming over to ask me to move because there are people who want to come in. But none of that matters, does it? Not when someone else is kissing my Taemin, and especially not when that someone else is Lee Jinki.

I can see the fear in Onew's eyes as he slowly draws back from the maknae's face, bright and real. And honestly, it scares me-- that I can be so frightening to someone. To someone that Tae loves, because I know he does. Just... not in the way, not in the way we had, that we do. And then I look at him, really look at Taemin, and​ I can see it there too. Reflected in those wide brown orbs, those very eyes that had once told me that I had the world in my hands, that I was the most amazing human being to grace the planet, that I was loved. But now, there's a fear there, a genuine fear.

And it scares me. It terrifies me: that I could frighten someone that means ​so ​much​ to me.

I find my body moving forward, propelled by the instinct to allay that terror from Tae's eyes. I watch as Onew immediately retreats backwards, away from the maknae's body, as if he could deny that the moment just occurred. As if he could erase the fact that he just stole that which I have longed to take from those crimson lips for as long as I can remember.

And as I cross the room my eyes automatically meet with Taemin's and that fear slowly begins to become more evident, more clear. But, as I near, I begin to realize that the emotion had evolved into something more, something greater. A fear that had sprung from the deepest caverns of his heart, his body. A fear of not the physical pain, but of the emotional pain, a fear of the scarring anguish that no human being ever wants to experience. A fear of the very pain that we both had felt that day. And are still currently feeling, even now.

The fear that everything that we share, everything that we feel, will fall to pieces. That it has fallen to pieces.

And as the distance between us slowly shrinks, with every step I make, this becomes evidently clear to me. The yearning for what was, and for what we can be, we both can feel it. We both desire it with all of our beings. And now, with that kiss, we are both terrified that it will all disappear, that it will all be for nothing. That we will be forever entangled in this web of sorrow.

But no, I will not let that happen.

And as I stride towards him, the distance shrinking to only a few mere inches, I watch as his hand stretches outwards, his fingers slowly extending towards me, an unconscious movement that stirs something deep in my heart. His desire for this pain, this anguish, to disappear is clear in his gaze. And his impulsive motion illustrates his deepest desires-- he longs to assuage this pain in his body, this emotional agony. His eyes are filled with the broken promises, the worry and desolate fear that it will be forgotten, everything will be in vain. All of this, said in a simple stretching of the arm and those unspoken words conveyed through his gaze. And with this one motion, it all becomes clear. Everything. He is reaching towards the very thing that can heal this wound. 

Me.

I stand, inches from the maknae's fingers, and watch as one tear slowly slips out of his wide eyes, listlessly crawling down his round cheeks. And, without a second thought, I move to catch it, leaning forward to graze my finger across his face, wiping it away. My thumb remains there, gingerly lingering on his face and he simply stares, vulnerable and afraid. I feel my breath catch in my throat as we stare at one another, caught in this moment.

And then Taemin's eyes close and he collapses into me, as if all of this pain has finally taken its toll, the burden of the last few days leaving him weak and frail. He presses his head into my chest, his fingers clinging to my shirt, his nails digging into my chest. My breath escapes in a gasp of relief and I let my own head fall onto his shoulder, drawing him into me as he begins to cry, whispering apology after apology into my shirt. I feel tears of my own begin to fall as I place a hand on his head, his hair as his body shakes with sorrow. I sink into his embrace, and breathe into his shoulder the words I have been longing to say.

"I'm sorry, Taemin. I'm so sorry."

I'm not sure how long we stayed there, clinging to one another while the tears streamed down our cheeks. I slowly raise my gaze when I hear Onew grumble, the leader's head resting on his splayed out arms, drool seeping out of his mouth. Taemin, his eyes red from crying, follows my lead, witnessing the same spectacle I am. I turn to look at him and a small smile flirts on his lips, follow by the hint of a laugh bubbling out of his parted mouth. I feel my own lips curling into a grin, tempted by Tae's contagious chuckle, before releasing the maknae from my arms.

"We need to take him home," I say as I start towards Onew, hands reaching out to wake the leader. But, before I reach him, I find myself turning back to look at Tae. His eyes are full and warm and the smile I have dreamt of seeing on his face is displayed there for all to see. I find myself staring, speechless, at his pure beauty, his pure happiness, his pure love.

"Thank you, Minho," he whispers. "Thank you for everything."

{{I think there will be one more chapter after this-- where you will see the reason why Minho and Tae fought. But yes, the angst was getting too much hehe; I just want my Tae and Minho to be happy! :) But I shall keep writing fanfics so if you want to read more of my writing, please feel free to subscribe! I really enjoyed writing this for you guys and I hope you enjoyed reading it! One more chapter and then Left Behind will be completed! :) Saranghae!}}

Haha just kidding-- after discussing it with some of my friends I am going to continue the story! Get ready for some angst and drama! Left Behind will be continued even further than I first thought- yay!