{Sorry for taking so long on the updates, everyone. I've been super busy with school coming up and all. But I'm hoping I'll still have time to update more frequently and stuff-- Senior Year shouldn't be too hard, I don't think. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Please comment and tell me what you think!}

Night blankets the Seoul skyline, pinpoints of light piercing the ebony sky. It is late-- Taemin, Jonghyun, and Key are already tucked into bed while I'm here, outside the dorm waiting for our leader. I lean my head back to press against the door's frame, washing my body in shadow as I do so. It is at least 1 am and Onew is still out. He said that he had a party to attend to but he felt the rest of us were too tired to accompany him, and like any good leader, he advised us to stay and get some rest; sacrificing his own well being for the sake of the group's reputation and public image. There was truth in his words-- my entire body sags with fatigue and my muscles are currently aching from the nonstop performances. So, perhaps he had been right in telling his to stay at home. But, why should he stay out so late?

I blink the weariness away from my eyes as I gaze over the busy Seoul streets. At least waiting for him has given me an opportunity to think. Despite the fact that Onew had claimed he had forgotten everything that had happened that night, I can't help but still feel cautious towards him. I mean, there had to be some motivation behind that kiss (even the mere thought of what had happened sends a shiver up my spine). I had been aware of his fondness for the maknae, but I had never really considered the thought that he had real feelings for Taemin. I mean, feelings besides a fatherly protection.

Yet, fathers don't kiss their sons.

I feel my fingers dig into my palm as I replay the moment in my mind: the way his hands grasped onto Tae's hair, pulling him closer, his lips pressed hungrily into the younger's mouth. Yes, there was clearly some emotion and passion there. And I can't, despite what Taemin has decided to do, just let it pass.

I look up at the sound of footsteps and sigh with relief as I see him coming up the steps towards the dorm, his hands in his pockets and his head low. At least he doesn't seem drunk, I observe thankfully. In this conversation he needs to be as sober as possible.

"Onew," I say as he nears me. He looks up, eyes wide as I startle him from his thoughts. A small smile presses on his lips as he realizes who it is and he seems to relax, that always present humor sneaking into his facade.

"You look awfully sketchy, Minho. Standing there in the dark, I mean." He fumbles with his keys as he talks, trying, in vain, to locate the proper one. "Were you waiting up for me?"

"Yah." I reach out and place a hand on the leader's own, halting his action. Confusion is clear in his gaze as he meets my own. "We need to talk."

"And we can't talk inside...?"

"I'd rather not wake the others," I say quietly, suddenly unsure how to go about this. Perhaps I had it all wrong, perhaps it was the alcohol that tainted his judgment. Perhaps he had mistaken Taemin for a girl, perhaps this was all a big misunderstanding.

But, what if it's all true?

"Onew... do you remember when you went out with Taemin two nights ago? After the showcase?"

His eyes seem to harden at the mention of that day, but I figure it has more to do with the circumstances I was left in that morning than anything else. He nods in response, rubbing a hand through his hair as he does so.

"Do you-- do you remember what you did at the bar?"

"Did I embarrass myself or something? I don't really remember much, to be honest. But why must we do this out here, Minho? And why now? I'm exhausted, and I know you must be too. Can't we do this some other time?"

"No." I say this firmly, and perhaps with a little too much vigor behind my words; in response, surprise flashes across my hyung's face. I go and stand in front of him, my fingers curling into fists as I attempt to stifle the anger that had begun to build inside of me. There is no way I will let him leave without getting a straight answer out of him. No, not after waiting out here for more than three ing hours.

"Minho...?" Onew asks, looking at me with a twinge of concern in his voice. I step back from him, creating distance between us as I attempt to regain some composure. I keep my eyes focused on the floor, awfully aware of my leader's stare piercing my through my body.

Even with all the anticipation, all the pain and fear I had experienced up until this moment, I am still at a loss of words. There is just so much I can ​say about it, so much I can demand a reason for. Why did it have to be Taemin? Why did you kiss him in the first place? Why did you seperate us that morning?

Do you have feelings for him?

I suppose that's the underlying question to it all; my deepest fear. For I am awfully aware of the way he gazes at the maknae, the pride clearly evident in his eyes when he sings a correct note or shines on stage. But, I had always told myself it was because he is the leader and thinks of Tae as someone who looks up to him-- a thought which as been proven true more than enough times. But not as anything more than that.

Not like... us.

And, then again, there's the fact that I shouldn't even care that much. It's not like Taemin and I are officially together, it's not like I have a claim to him. At least, not publicly. Realistically, anyone can kiss the maknae, and I should have no say over it happening. But the mere thought of someone's lips brushing against Tae's sends a shiver of disgust and rage through my body-- only suppressed by my fingers digging into my palm.

I can hear Onew open his mouth to speak, probably in an attempt to persuade me to go inside, but I cut him off.

"You kissed him." I look up as I say this, hating the pain that seeps into my voice as I do. "Did you know that?"

Shock flashes across my leader's facade as he stares at me, attempting to comprehend what I am saying. "Wha--?"

"You ing kissed Taemin, hyung." My voice is now almost a whisper, a hiss.

Onew shakes his head, disbelief clear in his eyes. "No, no I didn't do that. I wouldn't have..."

"Well you did." I say, too impatient for to let the information sick in. "And you don't remember any of it. But, he deserves an apology, or at least an explanation and... so do I."

He looks up then, bewildered by my last words. I meet his gaze, staring as I say these next few words.

"Why did you do it, Onew? Why did you kiss him?"

He looks away, clearly flustered. "Minho, I was clearly not in my right mind. I can't even remember what happened that night--"

"There has to be a reason, Onew. There's always a reason." 

"I was intoxicated, Minho! That's the reason!" He nearly shouts, throwing his hands up in exasperation.

My anger and impatience take over as I rush forward, my hands slamming into the wall on either side of the leader, pinning him there. Shock and a twinge of fear shine his eyes as he gazes up at me. My face, inches from my hyung's, is now flushed with frustration-- I can feel its heat curl down my neck.

"Do you love him, Onew? Do you love Taemin?" My words slowly slide out of my lips, hanging in the air as his eyes widen. Silence curls around us as the moments pass. I watch his mouth open and close, as if he is willing the words to come forth, but none can.

Because to deny it, it would be a lie.

My hands drop to my sides and I step away from him, head down and eyes lowered. "Right," I say as I create more distance between us-- not just physically but emotionally as well. Because as I walk away from Onew I know our relationship will never be the same, that this has created a fissure between us that will never be filled. He can no longer be a friend, but my competition.

I leave him the shadows as I retreat back into the dorm, burdened by the fact that I had already known.

Onew loves him.

But, so do I.