Irene liked being a mother.

Even with the lack of sleep, headaches caused by the lack of sleep and all her worries which Wendy was partly responsible for with her overthinking, it was all worth it. Especially when she sees how her daughter was growing with each week that passed. Weeks that turned to a month and before she knew it, her daughter was already 2 months old.

But Irene also liked being Wendy's girlfriend.

When you're in the early stages of a relationship and the first stage of motherhood at the same time, it's a rare exhilarating feeling that she's lucky enough to have experienced. But as much as Wendy assured her that she was content, that she was happy, Irene knew something was long overdue.

Irene admitted she was rusty. It had been so long since she last went out with someone and she may have even forgotten how to act. The other women she dated in the past never really cared much where they went and Wendy doesn’t seem like the type that would either.

But Wendy was different and if she didn’t care, Irene did.

She wanted it to be perfect, so she spent hours researching, thinking of the perfect location and the perfect schedule for a perfect day.

So naturally, she ended up with a cliché and found herself at an amusement park on a warm Monday morning with her girlfriend.

 

"When you said we would have a 'fun' day, I thought you meant Irene Bae’s idea of 'fun' and not actual, well, fun." Wendy laughed, admiring the massive park with all of its attractions after Irene paid for their passes.

It had been a while since Irene went to one and even just smelling the amusement park food was making her feel queasy. Or maybe it was seeing close to a hundred terrifying rides on the map (which was expected from the largest amusement park in the city) and even those she could see for herself from afar. The mascots scattered around the fountain at the entrance who greeted them did nothing to convince her she didn't make the wrong choice.

"What are you talking about? This is definitely fun for me," she said with a ‘pft’. "Being 230 feet above the ground then falling to your death or the 230 feet plus the high speed, the loops and turns then your death? Why wouldn’t it be fun?"

"I believe they have one that’s at least 70 feet taller than that," said Wendy with a mischievous glint in her eye that nearly made Irene run. Her expression probably gave it away and Wendy just laughed. "We won’t try that, of course. The whole point of meeting me was so Hyemi won't grow up with only one parent. But I do want to ride at least one," she added before Irene could sigh in relief. "If that’s okay with you."

"I'll be fine," she said determinedly and grabbed Wendy’s hand. "Now which one of these other monstrosities do you want to ride first?” She held the map up for Wendy.

"Are you really sure?" Wendy still asked even though she took the map from her.  "We can just spend the day sitting on a bench and eating junk or go on all the rides in the kids section. Do you know that teacup ride?"

"I actually drove here so I won't let that go to waste. All you need to worry about is the height requirement."

"You talk as if you don’t need a stool or a Joy to reach the top shelf."

"But I’m not the one who still needed a rolling pin even with the stool."

"You know, that 300-foot tall roller coaster doesn't sound so bad after all."

"I'm sorry."

 

 ⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

"So that's 3 rides I've wanted to try," she thought she heard Wendy say, though she wasn't quite sure since she was still shaking and her ears were still ringing from all the screams (Which were probably mostly hers). "What do you want to do?"

What does she want to do? She wanted to go home. Especially after she accidentally punched a father who tapped her on the shoulder after a particularly scary ride that made her, well, a little jumpy. After apologizing to him for her profusely, Wendy laughed all the way to the next attraction.

Although she refused to give up, she still needed a break so Irene tried to look around the theme park, looking for something tame. Preferably something that won't send an old person to an early grave. Surely one this big has a carousel?

Something caught Irene's eye and she started dragging Wendy through the crowd.

"Really?" Wendy snickered, staring at the brightly painted sign on the large booth they stopped in front of.

"Why? Too childish for you?" Irene smirked.

"No, it's just— I didn't have you pegged as the type to waste money."

"You're confident I'll lose?" She raised a brow.

"Oh I'm not saying you're the problem, but these things are fixed. The rings are small and are made of plastic so they bounce right off the bottles and it has to stay horizontal so you won't reduce your chances at getting it to land on the mouth.

"You've given this a lot of thought."

"Just simple observation." Wendy shrugged.

While seeming indifferent, she noticed that the other girl kept eyeing one particular stuffed animal hanging right over the bored booth worker's head.

Wendy had her arms crossed and was smiling at her when she was handed the rings. She didn't rush and just watched as one kid finished her turn with a disappointed groan as the ring slid between the bottles. Wendy gestured for her to begin and Irene moved to the other end of the booth.

Irene aimed for the bottle in the corner, but even when the ring missed the one she was aiming for, it slipped right over the one after it with a resounding clink.

She jumped up and down with a gleeful laugh while Wendy and the young girl next to her gaped at her.

"Must be beginner's luck." She grinned at Wendy after pointing at the prize she chose.

Wendy continued to gape at her while holding her oversized white bear as Irene won another prize and smiled at the stuffed koala in her arms.

"Hyemi can play with you when she's a little older and I can tell her a fun story about how mommy was wrong."

"This is absurd." Wendy pouted.

"Oh lighten up. You can get us a locker for these near the entrance and I'll get us some snacks. Then I'll go on more death-defying rides with you." Irene held out the stuffed koala for Wendy to take.

"Fine," Wendy grabbed it from her hands with an annoyed huff, but Irene knew the other girl was smiling when she walked away.

 

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

Irene watched the people down below grow smaller and smaller as their capsule continued its ascent. As much as she hated heights, it was a welcome reprieve to finally be so far away from the crowds of people of all ages in the amusement park. She realized it was pointless going on a weekday to avoid people in such a popular location.

Wendy didn't seem to mind. In fact, she had probably been smiling the whole day except for her five minute call with Joy to check up on Hyemi at home. But Wendy was never calm when it came to their daughter, so to Irene, it didn't count.

What was important to her is that right in front her, completely immersed in the view and the setting sun casting an orange glow over her face, Wendy was the most relaxed Irene had seen her in a while. The view was indeed incredible, but Irene was more interested in watching Wendy take it all in. Hours could have gone by and Irene wouldn't even have noticed. She was so beautiful.

Wendy caught her staring when she turned her head, but Irene didn't even flinch. She kept her eyes on her and continued to beam at her. Wendy tried to maintain eye contact but eventually broke it when she let out a laugh and looked at her feet.

"What’s so amusing?" Irene tilted her head.

"Well out of more than a hundred attractions this park has, this is one of the few I can get you to ride without you praying for your life while waiting in line so I'm just wondering why we're here and not, say, a nice restaurant after watching a romantic drama." An apology was on the tip of her tongue but Wendy had already waved it off. "Don't. I just find it funny."

Irene could tell her she was looking for more excitement in her life, but no one who knew Irene would ever believe that and they both promised to try and be more honest with each other.

"Seulgi told me you've always wanted to go and you just never had enough motivation to." She admitted, which, from her expression, definitely surprised Wendy. "I know I'm the wrong person to enjoy a day in a place like this with, but I kind of selfishly wanted to experience that with you."

Wendy’s face slowly broke into a soft grin and Irene swore the sun made it seem as though the other girl’s eyes were sparkling.

"Dummy." She chuckled. "Why wouldn’t my girlfriend be the perfect person to share this day with?" Irene's mouth had started to form into a grin of her own until Wendy added "And even if you weren't, I suppose your shrieks of pure terror would be entertaining enough to enjoy your company."

"Sadist."

Wendy laughed. "You’re the one who planned this. Does that make you a masochist?"

"An idiot's more like it." Irene replied, eliciting another laugh from Wendy.

"But still," Wendy began after a few moments. "This is weird for you too, isn't it?"

"What is?" She asked curiously.

"This." Wendy gestured to everything down below with a hand and clarified further "Today."

"Do you mean going on a real first date with my girlfriend while I'm worrying about my 2-month-old daughter with her? A little bit, yes." She smiled.

"So we both agree that this—not this particular day, mind you— is stupid? Cause really, I see any time spent with you as just that. Time spent with you."

"I agree with you on the last part, but still, I like it. It's new for us. I haven't really been alone with you in a while and even when we were alone, Hyemi was technically still with us."

Wendy nodded in defeat. "I see what you mean, I guess. And you're right, it is kinda nice." She finished with a tender smile. "Thank you."

"You don't have to," she shook her head with a giggle. "I would have planned this in a heartbeat if I knew you wanted it. Which is what I did. And you know…it's okay to worry. I mean you can't really erase the fact that we're parents now. To a 2-month-old, at that."

"Personally, I find it amazing that I'm handling this better than you." Wendy shrugged.

"Really?" Irene quirked a brow. "So if I check your phone I won't see 50 messages that you sent to Joy?”

Wendy poked the insides of her cheek with her tongue, refusing to speak. Irene smirked and leaned over to grab Wendy's phone from her coat. The brunette resisted, but Irene held both of her wrists and managed to get it before Wendy could shield her body with her knees.

She entered the security code which she had long figured out because Wendy loved their daughter too much to be practical. Irene smirked as she clicked on the first item in Wendy's inbox, ignoring the puppy dog pouts the other girl was surely sending her way.

"23. That is amazing. I expected at least 40." She said as she scrolled down and read some of them. Irene almost laughed at Joy's angry reply after the 15th message.

"Oh give me a break, our daughter's only 2 months old, okay?"

Wendy huffed out and crossed her arms in front of her.

"I know," Irene giggled. "But you'd have to learn to not be by her side 24/7. I mean it's not like you're gonna be a housewi— stay-at-home mom forever."

Irene wanted to slap herself at her slip of the tongue that could have brought up their friends' nagging questions they've worked so hard to ignore but thankfully only the first sentence registered in Wendy's brain.

"Yeah, but I just want to be there for her as much as I can. I mean growing up, it was hard for me. With my parents working and traveling all the time, I just—" Irene heard her sigh. "I don't want her to go through that."

She reached for Wendy’s hand which had been resting on her lap and took it in hers. "Nothing will go wrong if you let her out of your sight for an hour or two. It's been hours, and she's doing fine. Besides, you have me too, don't you?"

"I know that." Wendy rubbed the back of her hand with a thumb.

"Good. Don’t worry about Hyemi. Kids are just fine with working parents. And you’re not exactly working full time anyway." She laughed.

"Yeah, I suppose." Irene noticed Wendy biting her lip. "Irene, I've been meaning to ask, but are you sure about going back to work so soon?"

There it was. She knew the other girl had been itching to ask the question for weeks so Irene was already prepared.

"I don't think four more months is 'soon', Wendy." She smiled.

"I know but— I just thought you may have wanted to wait until Hyemi's at least a year old."

"I know it's advisable that I be around for that long, but I have to go back to work. She won't be alone and I'll always be home at night. She also has me on the weekends. We'll be fine.” She chuckled.

"Okay, okay," Wendy groaned and buried her face in her hands. "God, I'm sorry I'm such a worrywart."

"I told you I’m used to it." Irene grinned. She took one of her hands in hers once more and kissed her knuckles. "But you want to go home, don’t you?"

"Yes." Was Wendy’s immediate response, making Irene laugh.

 

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

"I'll drive," Wendy announced when they reached the parking lot. "It's the least I can do after everything you've been through for me today."

"You make it sound like I almost died for you." Irene snorted.

"I do seem to recall you chanting 'We're gonna die' 'This is it, we're gonna die' over and over earlier."

Irene glared at Wendy for the high-pitched tone she used for her impression of her voice before entering the car.

"Maybe I should ask Seulgi about places you hate and we can go there for our second date," Irene wondered out loud when they reached the main road.

"Now that’s not fair. You enjoyed yourself today, admit it. There’s proof sitting in the backseat. Both of them."

Irene took a quick peek at the stuffed animals she won and smirked. "Maybe a little."

"And you enjoyed the rides too." Wendy added with a smile. "Even though I’ve gone deaf."

Irene sighed. "Fine, that too."

Wendy let out a chuckle before focusing on the road once more.

They were already halfway back to the house when she noticed Wendy begin to contemplate something.

"Something wrong?"

"Maybe we can make a quick stop.”

Wendy drove in silence for five minutes even after she asked. She took a turn and drove down a familiar street Irene had regretfully not been to in half a year.

Wendy parked in front of the building, went out, and walked over to the passenger's side, waiting for Irene. She sat still and inhaled deeply as she stared at the entrance.

Irene wondered why it had taken so long for her to come back, but reminded herself that if she didn't have time to, she was simply unable to, being pregnant and all.

Wendy held out a hand with a raised brow. "We could go another day if you want. It's kind of weird going today anyway, but I just thought—"

"No, no, it's not. And I know this is our only chance to in a while." Irene nodded her head before stepping out of the car. "Okay, I’m ready."

Each step she had to take on their way inside was a struggle. Unwanted flashbacks started pouring in. Thoughts she believed she had moved on from. She remembered everything from the grey skies that day, to the phone call, and the woman who handed her the envelope that forced her to make a terrifying decision.

But she could barely remember where they were supposed to go and Wendy had to lead her.

She finally recognized one hallway with its immaculate white tiles and walls. They approached slowly, thankful that the only other person there had just finished their visit and left them alone. It didn’t take long for them to find what they were looking for.

"It's been a while," she said softly in Korean as soon as her palm made contact with the glass case that contained two frames.

It didn't escape her notice that Wendy knew exactly where to go since she herself lead her to them.

"Have you ever visited them?"

"This would be my first. Your mom told me when she visited last year." Wendy replied with a smile. "I thought about going but it didn't actually feel right visiting them without you, even if I wanted to."

"I'd probably do the same." She smiled back. "I still feel guilty about not visiting them sooner."

"Don't," said Wendy, wrapping a comforting arm around her waist. "They would understand that what you’ve been doing all this time is for them. I'm sure they're grateful for that."

Irene leaned her head on Wendy’s shoulder and sighed. "I miss them so much."

It felt good to finally admit that to herself. It had been a while since she allowed herself to think of the past. There was no point in denying the real reason she hasn’t visited them in months. It was simply too painful for her.

"Can I talk to them?" Wendy asked softly, surprising Irene. She recovered quickly and answered,

"Of course you can. You don't even have to ask me that."

 Wendy nodded gratefully. She let go of her waist and took a deep breath.

"Hi, Kevin. Hi, Daewon. It's Wendy." She chuckled nervously, and Irene had to smile at how she had her hands clasped in front of her like a kid as she spoke. "It's been so long since our last meeting. A lot of things have changed. I don't know how things work in the afterlife but I do hope they gave you an update."

Irene laughed at the other girl’s silliness and reached down so she could take Wendy’s hand in hers, letting their fingers interlock tightly.

"Hyemi's 2 months old now, and she's so, so beautiful. She looks so much like her mom, it's crazy." Irene wanted to interrupt like she always did and remind her that she had Wendy's eyes, but let her continue instead. "Thankfully, she's a lot calmer than most babies but I think even if she wasn’t, it wouldn't be a problem since she has so many people who adore her and would gladly take care of her.” Wendy chuckled. "She smiles a lot now, and every time she does, I feel like the luckiest person in the world."

Irene’s chest tightened at Wendy’s sincerity. She watched as the brunette fiddled with the hem of her top, trying to continue.

"I guess what I really want to say is thank you," she began. "I came to you a little over a year ago to help you start a family…but what happened was, you gave me one instead.” She smiled. "I could never repay you for that."

She tried to hold it in, but her eyes had started to water so she moved behind Wendy and wrapped her arms around her.

"Are you crying?" Wendy asked, looking over her shoulder.

"No." She lied, her voice muffled by Wendy’s back which she was leaning against.

She wiped away her tears and smiled as she felt Wendy laugh. She turned her attention back to the photos behind the glass and silently thanked her brother and brother-in-law for the girl in front of her.

 

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

It was already dark when Wendy pulled into the driveway.

"Seems like Hyemi's still awake" said Irene as she typed a reply to Joy. "They're in the living room."

"That's good I suppose. Hopefully she'll be tired enough to only wake up a few times the whole night."

"Not likely." Irene smirked. "I'm sure she missed us."

"Well I missed her too, so come on," said Wendy after unbuckling.

When they were already a few feet away from the door, Irene heard Wendy giggle.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, it's just...I've never gone home with someone on a first date."

"How scandalous." Irene let out an exaggerated gasp but her eyes remained expressionless, making Wendy laugh once more. "Well not many women had children with other women before going on a first date." She grinned.

"If this gets any more ridiculous, I may just take Seulgi up on that offer of turning our lives into a show."

"I will sue."

"Killjoy." Wendy said with a 'tsk'.

She moved towards her and started tickling her sides. Wendy desperately tried to stop her with her hands and begged for mercy and she finally let her go after a quick pinch of her that made Wendy squeak in surprise.

Irene grinned as she held Wendy close to her. The both of them breathing heavily.

"Why are we still here?" Wendy wrapped her arms around Irene’s neck and teased, "Not ready to go back to being a parent?”

"It might take a while before we get to do this again.” She said with hint of regret in her voice. "We can't keep on relying on our friends no matter how much they offer."

"I already told you." Wendy brushed a strand of hair away from her face. "Time spent with you is time spent with you."

Irene wondered how Wendy could think she was the luckiest person in the world when it was Irene who should be thanking the heavens for her own stubbornness that lead her to where she is.

The nagging questions were in her head again but looking at Wendy then, and thinking of the short amount of time she has known her, would it really be such a bad thing?

 

 

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Hello, wonderful readers. (If there are any left, that is) I understand that I've been away for god knows how long and I sincerely apologize and would also like to apologize for being unable to respond to messages. I just couldn't give a proper response while I was still so busy with everything. But I have returned from the dead and I could give you a long explanation for my absence but I wouldn't want to bore you to tears, so let's just say...life happened.

But I'm back and hopefully I won't be away for that long again. As always, I hope you enjoyed the update and I am forever grateful for all of the comments, upvotes and subscribers. I would also be grateful if you pointed out any errrors!