Wendy could think of a couple of sounds she absolutely could not stand. 

The sound of nails scratching down a chalkboard. 

The squeaking sound a balloon makes or when rubbing styrofoam together. 

The sound of soles scraping against the pavement.

Combine all of those, multiply it by a million, is the sound of her daughter's whimpers of distress while the doctor performed the necessary procedures for her 2-month checkup.

It was horrible.

When Hyemi let out her first wail after the shot, Wendy was already squeezing her own arm, her eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets. Irene tried to remain calm and was cooing at Hyemi as she gently caressed her head to soothe her, all the while giving reassurances that it will be over soon, but from the way she was gripping Wendy's hand, it was evident that she too, wasn't handling it well.

By the time the doctor had finished, Hyemi was still sniffling softly and staring up at Irene with a pained and almost confused expression. Almost as if she were asking why she had to experience that. 

Wendy saw tears in the corner of Irene's eyes when she took Hyemi in her arms and continued to whisper comforting words.

Minutes later, they proceeded with the rest of Hyemi’s checkup.

"She's growing slower than most infants her age."

They didn't notice that both of them were already clutching at their chests in fear before the doctor told them not to worry, explaining the growth chart to them.

"It's nothing alarming at this stage, and this is actually not that uncommon. Genes could also be a factor."

"Ahh," said Wendy softly, scratching at her face sheepishly.

Irene was definitely short, but at least Kevin was a good four inches taller than her. Still, it wouldn't help much if Wendy herself was short. It was almost regrettable that Daewon who was 5'9" didn't participate in Hyemi's conception instead. 

"We can’t be sure at this point but there are still a lot of risks that come with such cases so we just have to be more careful with her food intake in the future. We have to monitor her growth more closely. Rachel is still on milk, yes?" She asked Irene who nodded her head in response.

Wendy blinked in confusion for a few moments and almost forgot her own daughter's first name since they rarely used it other than for legal documents.

"Yes. But we actually introduced her to bottles about a week ago. That's okay, right?

"As long as it's still your milk, it should be fine. At least until she's 12 months. It may affect your milk production though, so still try to let her nurse when you can. Are you pumping regularly?"

The doctor asked Irene more questions about Hyemi's feedings and the schedule of their next appointment while Wendy held Hyemi's hand with three fingers and smiled at her reassuringly.

"You'll be okay, princess. We'll make sure of it."

When it was over, Wendy was still uneasy and kept sighing in the backseat during the ride home.

"For that one shot she got you looked as if you were getting pricked 50 times," Irene glanced at her through the rearview mirror and snickered.

"I can't stand it!" She dug her fingers into the back of her neck and whimpered. "She's my little princess and I can't bear seeing her face get all red when she cries! You know what, I want a new doctor. I want that old man on YouTube who makes funny faces at the babies."

Hyemi stirred in her car seat and started to make incoherent noises. Wendy leaned closer and held her hand. "Yes, pumpkin. You did really well and mommy's so proud of you."

Though she was aware her daughter didn't understand a word she said, Hyemi smiled at her and started kicking her tiny legs, looking even more adorable in one of the animal onesies Joy got for her. Wendy couldn't help but squeal.

"How come I don't get nicknames like that?" Irene chuckled. "You rarely called me baby again after I pointed it out."

"What do you want to hear, hm? Sweetie? Pudding? Sweet cheeks?"

"If you start calling me sweet cheeks, I will break up with you."

"What about doll face?"

"I will break up with you then I will punch you."

Wendy laughed as Irene pulled up in the driveway.

 

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

Another month had passed and after some convincing from Irene, Wendy finally relented and they spent one morning out in the park for Hyemi to get some sun somewhere that’s not their garden or balcony. All of her worries and fears vanished as she watched Hyemi's reaction to the wide open space and nature around them. Wendy spent the entire night reading about articles on babies and the outdoors to make sure they'll be doing everything right and Irene certainly didn't hold back in her facial expressions to show just how ridiculous she was being.

“Would you relax, look at all the babies around us. Look, there’s even one younger than Hyemi.” Irene nodded her head towards two men cooing at their newborn while sitting on a picnic blanket they had laid out on the ground. “All that reading should have told you there’s no harm in taking infants outside even just weeks after birth.”

Wendy narrowed her eyes at her before continuing to smile at Hyemi observing her surroundings with evident curiosity. Wendy still had her concerns, so they made sure to sit somewhere that was a good distance away from other people, which was a wooden bench that used to be Wendy’s favorite spot whenever she visited the park.

She followed Hyemi’s line of sight and pretended to gasp. “Look Hyemi, it’s a puppy!” The white maltese wagged its tail and barked, causing Irene to jump and cling to her arm. “And look at how scared your mom is after all that big talk about how harmless the park is!” she continued in the same perky voice, and it was Irene’s turn to glare at her.

Hyemi tilted her head up at Irene from Wendy’s lap and Irene adjusted her hat. “Don’t judge mom, Hyemi,” she said, eliciting a laugh from Wendy.

“Oh my god, how cute!” They heard someone exclaim and saw a man and woman who seemed to be in their 30’s walking on the pavement and heading towards their direction, probably planning on sitting on the bench several feet away from them. The man was carrying their toddler who was waving at Hyemi. “Honey, didn’t Amina have that same onesie when she was little?”

“Yeah, or something similar.” He chuckled.

“Oh hi! Sorry for bothering you. Your baby’s so cute!” The woman squealed, stopping in front of them.

“Thank you!” “Thank you.” They said unison. “And your daughter’s so beautiful!” Wendy waved at the girl who muttered a shy “thank you” before burying her face in her father’s neck. 

“How old is she?” The woman asked cheerfully.

“About 3 months,” Irene replied smiling.

"Wow, I certainly miss the times when I didn't have to worry about her running off to places." The woman let out a lighthearted laugh. “Really, it’s enough to give you a heart attack.”

"Oh, right. They do that.” Wendy grinned, wild-eyed and gritting her teeth. She hoped her laugh didn’t sound like a whimper, breaking down internally at all the terrifying scenarios that played out in her head.

“But it’s fine, we’re a team. I’m sure it’s nothing you and your wife can’t handle when that time comes.”

Because of how much time they spent locked up in the house after Hyemi's birth, it had been a while since they were put in a position like this. Wendy can definitely say she didn't miss it one bit.

"We've been married for 14 years and we’ve been through a lot but I will admit nothing compares to raising a child,” she continued. “She’s our first, you see. And a miracle baby. What about you two? How long have you been together?” 

She was wary of Irene. No one would ever doubt Irene's politeness, but her girlfriend has never been good with people who overshared and had a tendency to be straightforward if she ever felt like the situation called for it.

"That is true, but we're actually just dating."

Wendy blinked. She wondered why she was mildly disappointed when Irene didn't say for now when she probably didn't even mean anything by it and was just answering their question. She blamed it on her overthinking.

"Oh, you're not married. I'm so sorry I assumed! It's just, with the baby…is she both yours or—” They nodded their heads. “So personal choice then? It's quite popular with the youth these days. Oh forgive me, I didn't mean to pry." She laughed again.

"It's fine, it's just—well, it's quite complicated. And a long story." Wendy chuckled nervously.

"Well I won't push. I think I've said enough." She sighed. "Really, you should have stopped me. You know how I get when I start babbling like this." She hit her husband lightly on the shoulder.

"Our apologies," He said with a sincere smile. "I promise she means well. Let's give them some peace and quiet before you do anything you'll regret. You remember that guy from the bookstore?"

"Oh the one in cosplay!" She laughed loudly and her husband joined in on her laughter. "I can't believe you still remember that!"

A strange emotion washed over Wendy as she watched the pair walk away. One glance at Irene told her she had the same thoughts. It was clear to anyone it was a relationship built on compatibility, commitment and a level of understanding and ease that could only come with time. She wondered if she could dare to hope that they would eventually get to that point.

She was struck by a strong sense of déjà vu from the way Irene reached for her hand, still as comforting as it was the first time she held it the day they met. She intertwined their fingers and kissed her lightly on the temple, with Hyemi gurgling happily on Wendy’s lap.

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼

 

Seulgi visited them a week later, having been away on a business trip for almost two weeks.

“You’ve ‘redecorated’,” Seulgi pointed out, noticing all the excessive safety measures Wendy had taken all over the house.

“It’s always better to be prepared.” Wendy shrugged, leading the other girl to the kitchen.

"I really can't take you seriously with that thing." Wendy looked over her shoulder and followed Seulgi's gaze to the baby monitor on her wrist.

"What? It's convenient. It just makes me appreciate being born in this era. I think I would have gone crazy had I been raising a baby in the 1800's."

“I think I would have gone crazy had I been the baby you were raising in the 1800’s,” Seulgi commented which earned her a glare from Wendy, but she was already too busy getting glasses and plates from cupboards to notice. "God, I'm starving."

Wendy rolled her eyes. “Like you weren’t stuffing yourself your entire trip. I saw your IG posts. There’s more photos of food than of your face or the ‘beautiful scenery’.”

"Heh, guess no matter what house you’re living in the fridge will always look the same. It’s packed in here. Oh, I thought infants that young aren't supposed to have formula yet," said Seulgi, taking out a bottle from the fridge. Wendy watched her squeeze a drop on her finger and tasted it. "It kinda tastes funny. Is it supposed to be like that?"

"That's Irene's." She winced.

"Irene's what?"

"Irene's..." Wendy patted her chest.

Seulgi blinked for a few seconds then started gagging.

"Hyemi has to start getting used to a bottle before Irene goes back to work. I can't exactly feed her myself. This is entirely on you, honestly. It’s like you haven’t been around Irene for the past few months. Or any other mother your entire life. Also, it’s not really good to store formula in the fridge, so we won’t be doing that." Seulgi was too busy gargling water by the sink to listen to her. "Oh come on, it's not that bad. I mean I wouldn't know, but it shouldn't be."

"It's not exactly the taste I'm concerned about, Wendy! Why didn't you label it!?"

"Because no one in this house would think to drink out of a baby's bottle in the fridge, milk or not, Seulgi." She replied with a tight-lipped smile. 

Seulgi was still shooting dirty looks at her as she was eating the meal Wendy prepared for her minutes later. Wendy simply ignored her and continued taking small sips of her tea as she was watching the baby monitor where Hyemi was sleeping soundly.

“So how is Hyemi?”

“Good. Great. At least I think so. Sometimes she gets really quiet like Irene, but she’s a very happy baby.” Wendy smiled, recalling an incident days ago when Hyemi spent minutes observing Yeri’s every move which scared the teen. She’ll definitely take after her mom and the thought of a mini Irene makes her heart swell.

“And how are you and Irene?” Seulgi asked next.

“Sleeping much better, thankfully.” She laughed. “Since Hyemi doesn’t wake up as much as she used to.” 

"I mean how’s your relationship with your girlfriend. Especially now that she’s planning on going back to work." 

"What?"

"Well I understand your schedule's incredibly flexible, but you do prefer making your rounds on Saturdays which is like one of the only two days Irene has free. And I know teachers still have work on the weekends. Like grading papers, planning lessons, not to mention you said she insisted on doing the laundry on the weekends. There's also—"

Whether or not Irene enjoyed it, she still felt bad that Wendy would be left with the household chores along with Hyemi so she insisted she’ll try to help as much as she could, after getting back from work. Wendy had thought about getting help, though she wasn't sure if a woman who refused to let a stranger carry a baby for her brother would allow one into their home to take care of her own daughter. 

They also had to bring Hyemi to her parents twice a month which Wendy thought could be negotiated and they would have understood, but it was a promise Irene intended to keep because it was a way to make up for Wendy keeping a secret from them and a way to get her mom to warm up to Irene more.

"Then I'll move it." Wendy interrupted with a sigh. "Irene can't adjust her schedule and I can so why shouldn't I? Besides, right now we’re spending a lot of time together."

“Is that the same?”

“What is?”

"All I'm saying is— Hyemi!" Seulgi squealed and practically teleported to the foyer where Irene and Hyemi were, completely forgetting about Wendy who was left standing there.

"Good talk, Wendy," she said to herself sarcastically before following Seulgi.

"Aunt Seulgi missed you so much I just want to pinch your squishy cheeks!" said Seulgi, but settled for kissing them instead. Irene stood there with a still drowsy Hyemi in her arms as Seulgi continued to shower her with affection. “Oh! Oh! I got you something from my trip. It’s in my car, hang on.” With that Seulgi dashed out of the house, leaving behind a bewildered Irene.

"Well she's acting stranger than usual," Irene noted. "She didn't even look at me. Do you know what's wrong with her?"

"Trust me when I say you do not want to know."

⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼⇼
 

“Four and a half minutes. I’d say that’s a new record for me.” Wendy started punching the air in victory.

“I was with her for over half an hour before you came to tuck her in.” Irene crossed her arms smugly as Wendy plopped down next to her and stretched back against the couch with a grunt before letting out a soft exhale.

“You wanna watch a movie?” said Wendy moments later, tilting her head up to look at Irene who was busy with her phone.

“So sudden?” Irene asked in Korean, sounding somewhat amused.

“Our friends still think we’re not spending a lot of quality time together.” Wendy sighed. 

“But what is their idea of quality time anyway?”

“I don’t know, talking, preferably not about our daughter’s diaper supply. Getting to know each other more which isn’t exactly a problem for us, and...I guess just more couple-y things.”

She has known Irene for almost a year. They talk everyday. Have spent every waking moment with each other not even that long after they met. They already know each other’s habits and quirks, and what usually occupies their thoughts. 

“What’s more couple behaviour than living in the same house, sharing a bed and raising a baby together?”

“Exactly. But I guess they just mean quality time for ordinary couples.”   

“Well my exes’ idea of quality time was going out as much as possible, but that’s not us, so...” Irene trailed off.

“Huh. You never really talk about your exes much,” Wendy commented.

There was a subtle change in Irene’s expression that Wendy couldn’t work out, but was given away by the corner of her lips pulling up into a smirk.

“You’re not jealous, are you?” 

“No?” Wendy scoffed, squashing the image of Irene’s hands on another woman in her head.

“Interesting.” Irene cupped her chin in thought. “It’s usually me who gets jealous, so this is refreshing.”

“When do you get jealous?” Wendy furrowed her brows. “And of whom?”

“Never. No one,” said Irene a little too hastily. “We’re shifting. Back to the topic at hand. So quality time?”

“Still thinking.”

Wendy had given it a bit of thought on how else she should be acting around Irene, but she wasn’t sure what would be too fast and too sudden. All she knew was that they were indeed taking it slow. Too slow, even. But as always, Irene was there to take the reins and decide for her.

Irene put on a soft, jazzy song without uttering a word and smiled at her, holding out her hand. Wendy was still eyeing her curiously but took it nonetheless and allowed Irene to pull her close and place another hand on her waist as they started to dance to the music.

“And you call me spontaneous.” Wendy grinned.

“Stop talking and just go with it.” Wendy laughed at that but did as she was told and just enjoyed Irene’s warmth, resting her head against the slightly taller girl’s shoulder.

She really could get used to this, Wendy decided, her friends’ concerns long forgotten. They’ll just do everything at their own pace. Whatever feels right.

When the song ended, it was hard not to notice the switch of genres as the first few notes of the next song played, Wendy immediately recognizing the familiar sound of R&B.

Irene slowly pulled away from her, but had a glint in her eye that had Wendy’s mind working at full speed to determine what her girlfriend was up to. Any teasing remark she was about to make died in when Irene started.

Though not on purpose, whenever she saw someone dancing, Wendy always found herself comparing them to Seulgi, who was the best dancer she knew. Her best friend could dance to just about any song, which was tested and proven by Wendy herself when she played a nursery rhyme right after some traditional korean music. It was both disturbing and amazing and they agreed never to speak of it again. 

Seulgi was sharper and had more powerful dance moves though. But Irene...Irene was different.

The girl had grace and sensuality unlike anyone Wendy has ever seen.

Her eyes continued to watch the girl's every step, completely mesmerized by how her body swayed to the music. It didn't help that she stared at her with such an intense gaze, with the intention of keeping all of her attention on her. Wendy thought it was absurd and unnecessary because she already had it in the first 5 seconds, but she wasn't about to complain.

Not when Irene was moving towards her with a look that had Wendy weak at the knees, her hands trembling at each stride she made.

Wendy didn’t know where to focus, Irene’s captivating eyes, the fluidity of her every move, or her own breathing which was proving to be very hard to control at the moment. She didn’t understand how anyone could make a simple fitted black shirt and jeans look that good, but this was Irene. Wendy was confident the girl could wear anything and make it seem like the most glamorous piece of clothing in the world.

Irene didn’t miss a beat. Even when the tempo picked up, she perfectly executed moves that had Wendy losing all ability to speak. She was hypnotizing. She could also tell Irene knew the effect she had on her, if that hint of a smile on her face wasn’t enough of an indication.

When the song was about to come to an end, Irene approached her from across the room, her steps easy and unhurried. When she finally reached her, she gently wrapped an arm around Wendy’s shoulders as she sat on her lap, crossing her legs. It was only then that Wendy realized she was no longer standing and somehow ended up sitting on the couch again during Irene’s impromptu performance.

“See now, that was the type of thing I would have liked to know about you.” Wendy congratulated herself on managing to form a full sentence with only a slight stutter and a pitch higher than her normal speaking voice. “What else are you hiding?”

“Stop. Talking.” Irene pulled her by the collar and closed the gap between them.

They've kissed plenty of times before— had let themselves get carried away in between Hyemi's strict schedule for them, but this wasn’t like any of those.

It was soft at first, gradually growing more passionate as hands started to roam each other’s backs. Irene slid her tongue across Wendy’s bottom lip to seek entrance. Gentle, but demanding. Not once did she think of feigning any control over the situation and allowed Irene to deepen the kiss, letting her take the lead.

The next minute that went by was a blur. She didn’t know when she leaned further back on the couch or when Irene had adjusted her position to straddle her thighs, too lost in the kiss and each other to notice anything else. 

Before things could escalate further, Irene pulled away, leaving Wendy breathless and confused. She kissed her on the cheek softly before standing up from her lap. She was still sporting that knowing smile when she retired to their bedroom, completely unfazed and graceful as ever in each step she took. Unbelievable.

Wendy cleared and straightened up, attempting to fix her dishevelled hair. “I’d say that was quality time, yeah.” She whispered to herself before following Irene.