Green: Yesung                          Blue: Kangin

I didn't sleep a wink. I kept musing on the words I'd say to her. What should I say? How should I act? What should I do? That was the first all-night contemplation on something since debut. And by dawn I realised that that woman was really the Muse I waited for all these years. Not only the Muse, but the woman I waited for. The moment the sun rose, I put on some casual clothes. I didn't want to overdo it. I put my cap and sunglasses on, carried my bag and walked out. Every cell in my body screamed; yes!!

- Hyung where are you going this early?

I heard Sungmin asking. I raised my head to find Yesung hyung ready to go; and with a bag.

- 야, 너 어디 가? Ya!! Where are you going?

Teuk hyung was getting worried. Yesung hyung was definitely acting weird lately.

- An undercover operation

Yesung hyung declared as he walked out. We all stared at the blank behind him. His ailment was serious!!

Well Chohwa, you only have little work to do; finish it and you're free. I have to put the last touches on my book-review before submitting it today. At four I'll meet my buddies. We'll have lunch, go take the photos then I'll go submit the book review. Aja aja fighting!!

I don't know the floor number. I don't know the apartment number. But she said she's a journalist so she'll surely go out. Yesung-ah; fighting!!

Assa!! Mission Accomplished. I finished my task and reviewed it. It was ready to be submitted. It's 3:30. The guys are on the way. I'm so excited for today oh my god!! And SeungRi would be there also; YES!!

It's 4. I've been waiting for 9 hours. It's ok man. You waited for her for a lifetime. What are 9 hours compared to a lifetime? She'll definitely come out.

I opened my wardrobe and stared. Mmm, since it's a planned date with my buddies I got to be casual AND pretty. I skimmed through the dresses and picked a white dress with blue patches. That would be perfect!! I bobbed down the stairs excitedly.

I was outside the building waiting for Bum oppa's car when I heard someone calling me:

- Chohwa-ssi

I turned around and caught Yesung oppa standing right there. He was wearing a white shirt, a cap with FBI on it, WHY-STYLE sunglasses, black jeans and a bag. He looked exhausted.

- Oppa, what brings you here?

No matter how corny it sounds, she looked like Cinderella coming down those stairs. I was standing by my car in front of the building when she capered down. Hair brown curls jumped as she jumped. She looked quite chirpy and it was adorable. With every step she took, my heart beat faster. I could hear my heart beat. I felt it was about to burst out. I had to put my hand on it to keep it in place. I called to her and she looked at me with those alluring brown eyes then said: oppa. Time stopped that minute. She shouldn't call me that, not that way, not with those lips, not with those eyes, not with that voice. I wanted to look cool. I planned to look indifferent. Even after 9 hours of waiting I intended to act carefree. But when she gaped at me, her head on one side, pouting and waiting for an answer I was dumbstruck and could say nothing. I only stared at her beauty when someone called:

- Hyung!!

Donghae? Kibum? And Lee SeungRi? What were these guys doing there?

They walked to where I was standing with Chohwa-ssi. When she heard Donghae's voice she turned swiftly. I thought she'd be glad to meet other SuJu members since she confessed being a fan. But what happened then left me really flabbergasted. Chohwa-ssi beamed at them then high-fived all. They circled around her admiring the dress. They asked about the book review. How did they know she was writing a book review? They all looked; close. Ani, too close. They looked really close. The way they all acted brought a lump to my throat.

With his arm around Chohwa-ssi's shoulder; Kibum asked:

- 형, 우리 조화 어떻게 알아? How do you know our Chohwa?

우리 조화?!! Our Chohwa?

I felt the sting of being the outsider there. Looked like everyone ELSE was close. Everyone ELSE was happy.

I heard Chohwa-ssi replying:

- We met once in Mouse Rabbit and we promised to meet again

- 형 설마!!! Hyung! no way!!

Donghae covered his mouth as he saw my expression. Donghae realised it that moment but the others were clueless. He wouldn't mention it to her I believed!!

- But; I ventured to ask, how do you all know each other?

- Ah!! Donghae replied sounding really pleased, you remember the buddies for life thing Kibum and I told you about? This is it; Kibum, SeungRi, Chohwa and I.

He dragged SeungRi and they evolved around Chohwa.

-Don't we look great together?

You look great and it's breaking my heart

- Sure; I uttered

- Hyung

SeungRi hailed:

- Do you want to join in?

They all stared at me and I looked back at Chohwa who waited for an answer as eagerly as a child for his candy.

I summoned all the courage I had, looked her in the eye and said:

- Ani; I'd rather be someone special

I saw her smile fading. The way she looked at me then wasn't that of an oh-my-god-Super-Junior's-Yesung-is-talking-to-me look. She gazed with eyes full of curiosity then managed a careful smile. I felt my heart throbbing; at least she didn't disregard me.

Kibum broke the awkward atmosphere:

- Hyung, we're going to eat, feel like joining?

- No thanks. I'd rather have a meal with Chohwa-ssi alone. Chohwa-ssi, will you give me your phone number?

While she was still thinking about an answer Donghae jumped in:

- I'll give it to you hyung

- You have it?

The three raised their mobile phones. I hate you all!!

- I'll call you

I was about to get into the car when I heard her voice:

- 종운 오빠, 잘가요. JongWoon oppa; bye bye.

I stared at the empty space in front of me and felt nothing.

I was shaking. I tried to compose myself in front of the guys but I couldn't help it. ''I'd rather be someone special'' kept ringing in my ears. At the beginning it was the shock. Super Junior's Yesung wants to be someone special to me –let's not think what that could be-. Then it was the dread of it –can I handle that?-. But ultimately the sweetness of it ruled and deep-down I wanted him to be someone special.

We had lunch and I tried my best to heed what they were saying. My nerves didn't calm but I was mentally present after some time. We picked the photos and made jokes about them. Oppadeul picked on SeungRi all the time, poor friend. But oddly enough he seemed to enjoy teasing; if it wasn't coming from me that is. As we were sitting in what we came to call ''our park'' we played a game and the loser was going to sing and dance. I lost.

- Now you'll sing a SuJu song; Hae oppa ordered

- Why? She'd sing a Big Bang song of course; objected SeungRi

- I will sing neither.

They threw a look at me. I pretended to hold a microphone and started my show:

- Hello ladies and gentlemen. Today I'll sing and dance Kim Jun's great song; Jun Be Ok.

- Mwo???

They all bowled

- Honestly guys it's been getting on my nerves for years. Every time I talk of Kim Jun, people exclaim who that guy might be.

- Chohwa-ya; SeungRi interrupted.

- Be quiet and listen; I instructed.

I'd say T-Max and they'd stare. I'd mention his shows; they'd stare at me. I'd mention his dramas; they'd also stare at me but when I'd mention Boys over Flowers they'd be like: who? Ah!! The Casanova!! I mean for God's sake!! That was great and that was where I saw him for the first time but that wasn't his only work and that doesn't mean not to even remember his name

I burst out

- Chohwa-ya; Bum oppa called but I ignored him. I was so into the mood I had to sing and dance Jun Be Ok right then and there. I started singing but Donghae oppa hailed:

- Ya Park Chohwa!!

- Mwo mwo mwo?

They all pointed at something behind me. I turned and beheld Kim Jun standing there grinning from ear to ear. I stepped back and wished the Earth would open and swallow me. I bowed and turned to the guys mouthing:

- Since when?

- Since the very beginning

Damn it!! So embarrassing!!

After the introduction Kim Jun smiled at me and said:

- Honestly I had an argument with my agency today over the same topic that you mentioned Chohwa-ssi. I felt so helpless I was trying to find some escape. I wanted to forget all about me. As I walking aimlessly I heard some voices. I looked up and glimpsed you. I turned around to walk away. I didn't want to talk to anyone I knew when I heard you saying you'd sing my song. I froze in my place then heard your defence. I'm so thankful; you actually saved me. I was about to fall into depression. What can I do to pay you back?

- Mmm actually we're a gang and we need a leader. Can you be that leader?

Kim Jun looked around and the guys joined in. Kim Jun agreed to be our leader. I had another oppa in no time. Blissfully I had four buddies for life. Jun oppa excused himself to leave first on the promise that he'd join us when we meet the next time. We drove to the office where I dropped the book review. I found my new task on my desk. Waa!! That Edward never skips anything!! There was a book fair held the coming week and I was to attend it daily to write a detailed report on it. Kangta seonbae would be with me for photographing. The guys dropped me off.

I lay in my bed and stared at Kangin's poster. Kangin has always been my diary. I've always told him everything:

- Oppa, I have four buddies now, and for life. I'm so happy to have them. I forget the whole world when they're around. They just... They just make everything shine.

Keurigo oppa, if Yesung oppa calls on me; I'll gladly go to him.

I love you oppa. Sleep tight.